125+ Beach Jokes & Puns: Seas The Day!
Get ready to laugh your shells off because you’ve stumbled upon the ultimate list of beach jokes and puns! We’ve combed the sandy shores of humor to bring you the best collection of clever and positive beach-themed wit. Did you know that more grains of sand exist on all the beaches on Earth than stars in the Milky Way? It’s true! But you know what’s even more impressive? This list of funny puns and jokes that will make you the lifeguard of laughs on your next beach trip. Dive in and get ready for some fun!
Top Beach Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks: Shorely Hilarious
- Don’t get tide down to your worries, go to the beach!
- Beach hair, don’t care. (Classic, but a classic for a reason!)
- Shell we dance on the beach?
- I’m shorely having a good time.
- Feeling fintastic at the beach.
- This beach is so lovely, it’s unreal. (Bonus points if you’re on a sandbar!)
- I’m feeling beachy keen on this view.
- Life’s a beach, and then you tan.
- Seas the day! Oh wait, I’m already at the beach.
- Keep palm and carry on… to the beach!
- Having a whale of a time at the beach.
- This is my resting beach face.
- Beach more, worry less.
- Dear Ocean, I can sea clearly now.
- Happiness comes in waves.
- High tides, good vibes.
- Let’s get nautical! (Perfect for a cheeky beach photo)
Funny Beach One-Liner Jokes for a Shore Thing Good Time
- I’m writing a song about a beach, but I can’t seem to find the right key… maybe C-shell?
- Someone told me to avoid the beach because of all the sharks. I said, “Don’t worry, I’m only going for a little while.”
- My therapist told me to embrace my mistakes…so I went back and hugged the sandcastle I tripped over.
- I tried starting a business selling sand on the beach, but it turned out to be a real…shore thing.
- I wanted to name my pet seagull “Salt”, but then I realized that would just be gull-ible.
- Life is like the ocean, it’s better with a little buoy-friend.
- I met a girl at the beach who loved volleyball; apparently, I love her net.
- My friend got hit in the face with a frisbee at the beach…it really disc-turbed his day.
- Sunscreen is like life advice: you can ignore it, but you’ll regret it later.
- Beach rules: Soak up the sun, not the drama. Seas the day!
- Sandals are the only shoes where it’s socially acceptable to have a public toe-down.
- The ocean is my therapist, and the waves are its way of saying, “Don’t worry, be-salty.”
- Don’t be shellfish, share your beach umbrella.
- I got kicked off the beach volleyball team for constantly crab-bing about the referee’s calls.
- I tried to explain to the seagull that my sandwich wasn’t a phone, but I couldn’t get through to him.
- What’s a beach party without music? It’s just…the sand and the sea.
QnA Jokes & Puns about Beach: Shorely Hilarious Quips
- Q: Why do beaches make such bad liars? A: You can easily sea right through them.
- Q: What do you call a seagull with a sunburn? A: A beached bum!
- Q: What kind of music do they play at beach weddings? A: Anything with a good beat, obviously!
- Q: What’s a surfer’s favorite college course? A: Alge-bra, of course!
- Q: How do you communicate with a fish on the beach? A: You drop them a line.
- Q: What do you call a lazy kangaroo at the beach? A: A pouch potato.
- Q: Did you hear about the crab that went to the beach party? A: He pulled a mussel!
- Q: Why did the ocean get so angry? A: It was feeling tide down.
- Q: My friend said he wanted to meet me at the beach, but then he bailed… A: Sounds like he bottled it!
- Q: Why don’t they have clocks on the beach? A: Because time and tide wait for no one!
- Q: What’s a shark’s favorite beach read? A: Anything by Jaws Steinbeck!
- Q: I tried to take a panoramic photo of the beach, but my phone died halfway… A: Don’t worry, I hear those things happen in waves!
- Q: Why do the waves of the ocean crash and roar? A: You’d be upset too if you had crabs on your bottom!
- Q: I’m looking for love, but I don’t know… should I try the beach or online dating? A: Well, at least at the beach, you can get your toes wet before diving in!
- Q: I’m not sure if I look good in this beach selfie… A: Don’t worry, you shore do!
- Q: What did the ocean say to the beach? A: Nothing, it just waved!
- Q: What’s a beach’s favorite snack? A: A sandwich!
Dad Jokes about Beach: Guaranteed to Make You Seasick
- I wanted to name my daughter Sandy after that day we met at the beach. The wife said it was too cheesy.
- I told my wife we should spend a week at the beach… She packed seven suitcases! Seems a little extra, beach or not!
- Tried to take a panoramic photo of the whole beach… Turns out, you actually need a camera for that.
- I’m not saying the beach was crowded, but the tide refused to come in! Said it couldn’t beach the traffic.
- Asked my wife if she wanted to hold my hand and stroll down the beach, but she just rolled her eyes. Guess I’ll have to find someone else to sea with me.
- I tried to make a sandcastle that looked like our beach house… But everyone said it was un- be-leave-able!
- What’s a volleyball’s favorite part of playing on the beach? Getting served!
- My wife asked me to buy her some sunscreen at the beach. I told her I could only get SPF 50. She said, “Just get that one. It’s the one less tan the store sells.”
- Why can’t basketball players ever relax on the beach? They’re always called for traveling!
- Kid came up to me on the beach and asked if I knew how to make a sandcastle jump. I said, “You can’t be sirius!”
- This one kid kept kicking sand on my beach towel. At first, it was just irritating, but then it became a real beach problem.
- I thought about going to the bank before our beach trip, you know, to get some spending money… Then I remembered, I’m already shore broke!
- The ocean is constantly salty… Guess it’s just made that way.
- Just saw a seagull trying to eat a watch. I guess it thought it was a tide bit.
- I’m friends with all the lifeguards at this beach. We really clicked!
- What’s a beach’s favorite genre of music? Anything with a good wave-length.
- My son asked me what the opposite of “beach” is. I said, “That’s easy! It’s you-niche!”
Funny Quotes and Captions about Beach: Shore to Make You Smile
- “I’m not saying I’m obsessed with the beach, but I’d probably trade my WiFi password for some WiFi-fi.”
- “Life’s a beach, and I’m just trying to avoid the sunburn…and the sand in my pants.”
- “Shell-abrate good times, come on!” (Insert embarrassing photo of friend/family covered in seaweed)
- “Beach hair, don’t care. Unless it’s full of seaweed. Then I care A LOT.”
- “Suns out, buns out…of sunscreen! Back to the car!”
- “My therapist told me to go to a place that brings me happiness. So here I am…again.” (Picture of you buried up to your neck in the sand).
- “Saltwater heals all wounds…except the sunburn I got trying to be a bronze goddess.”
- “I followed my heart, and it led me to the beach…and also to this awesome taco stand.”
- “Keep calm and beach on…unless a crab steals your drink. Then panic is acceptable.”
- “You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy a ticket to the beach, which is basically the same thing.” (Show off that slightly burnt, very happy face!)
- “The only thing I like about tan lines? Knowing I had enough fun to get them.”
- “Vacation mode: Activated. Please do not disturb, unless you have snacks.” (Picture of you lounging in a beach chair).
- “Seas the day! …or just take a nap on the beach. Both are valid options.”
- “I’m just a happy little clam…who forgot to reapply sunscreen.”
- “I’m not sure what’s more breathtaking, the ocean view or this giant pretzel I’m about to devour.”
- “Sandy toes, salty kisses, and endless sunshine. Life doesn’t get much beach-er than this.” 😉
Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Beach: Shorely You Can Relate
- A tan a day keeps the doctor at bay… or at least makes you forget about them for a while.
- You can lead a man to the ocean, but you can’t make him put down his phone and enjoy it. #BeachLifeProblems
- The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the beach umbrella without the sand on it.
- Don’t cry over spilled margaritas, there’s more where that came from. You’re at the beach!
- Life’s a beach, and then you get a sunburn. Remember sunscreen!
- Early to bed, early to rise, makes you sunburnt and everyone else gets the good beach spot.
- The couple that kayaks together, stays together… or at least ends up hilariously wet together.
- A watched pot never boils, but an unattended sandcastle rarely lasts an hour.
- Don’t count your chickens before they hatch, and don’t pack your swimsuit until you check the weather forecast.
- Too many cooks spoil the broth, and too many beach towels make it impossible to find your spot again.
- Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither is a killer sandcastle. Patience, young one.
- You can’t judge a book by its cover, and you can’t judge a beach day by the first cloud.
- Silence is golden, unless you’re on a beach listening to the waves crash. Then it’s pure magic.
- Good things come to those who wait, like the perfect wave to ride or that beach umbrella someone left behind.
- All’s well that ends with sand between your toes and a sunburn on your nose.
Beach Double Entendres Puns: Shorely You Can’t Resist These!
- “I’m feeling myself at the beach today… literally, I stepped on a jellyfish.”
- “This beach is so packed, I can’t even sandwhich myself a spot on the sand.”
- “I tried to impress a lifeguard with my beach body… turns out they’re more concerned with CPR skills.”
- “This heat wave is unbearable; even the tide seems to be panting on the beach.”
- “Heard there’s a new dating app just for beachgoers… It’s called ‘Sand-dal’ and it’s shore to be a hit.”
- “My love for you is like a seashell; I picked you out from a whole beach.”
- “I’m not sure what’s hotter today, the sun or the lifeguards… either way, I’m getting burned.”
- “Tried to build a sandcastle, but it kept collapsing… guess I’m just not that shore-ganized.”
- “Don’t be shellfish, there’s plenty of beach for everyone!”
- “This sunscreen smells suspiciously like coconut and disappointment… maybe it’s just my love life.”
- “My therapist told me to take a break and relax by the ocean… guess you could say I’m tide down right now.”
- “I’m so sunburnt, I look like a lobster who just won the lottery… and I’m about to be just as crabby.”
- “Life’s a beach, and I’m just playing in the sand… hopefully, I don’t get buried by responsibilities.”
- “I’m not saying this beach is crowded, but I accidentally sunbathed on a stranger’s back.”
- “I’m going to need a bigger towel… and maybe a whole new identity after this sunburn fades.”
- “Remember, life is like the ocean: Go with the flow, avoid the sharks, and always try to catch some rays… unless they’re stingrays, then run!”
- “I got lost on the beach today… it’s okay, I found myself again. Turns out, I was hiding in a bag of chips.”
Funny Beach Tom Swifties for a Shore-fire Good Time
- “This beach umbrella is huge!” Tom exclaimed tentacularly.
- “Someone stole my flip-flops!” Tom cried barefootly.
- “The tide seems to be going out,” Tom observed recedingly.
- “Let’s build a sandcastle that reaches the sky!” Tom declared loftily.
- “Watch out for that jellyfish!” Tom warned stingingly.
- “This sand is so hot!” Tom yelped footly.
- “I love collecting seashells,” Tom said shellfishly.
- “This sunscreen smells like coconuts,” Tom remarked oilily.
- “Be careful not to get swept away by the current,” Tom advised swimmingly.
- “This seaweed tickles!” Tom giggled kelpfully.
- “The waves are crashing quite loudly,” Tom shouted surfingly.
- “I can’t believe how many people are here,” Tom muttered beachily.
- “This piña colada is delicious!” Tom said tropically.
- “I think I got sunburned,” Tom mumbled redly.
- “I dug a really deep hole!” Tom boasted sandily.
- “This beach is so peaceful,” Tom whispered serenely.
- “I can’t wait to come back here tomorrow!” Tom exclaimed shorely.
Knock-Knock Jokes about Beach for Shore-Fire Laughs
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Beach. Beach who? Beach, please! I’m trying to relax!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, the tide is coming in!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Sandy. Sandy who? Sandy you think we could go for a swim now?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shell. Shell who? Shell we build a sandcastle together?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Water. Water who? Water you doing later? Let’s hit the beach!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Don. Don who? Don’t be shellfish, share your beach towel!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Seas. Seas who? Seas the day and catch some waves!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Clam. Clam who? Clam down! It’s just a little sand in your shoes.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ariel. Ariel who? Ariel-ly want to go snorkeling in the ocean!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Sun. Sun who? Sun’s out, buns out! Let’s get some rays!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Wave. Wave who? Wave goodbye to your worries and hello to the beach!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shore. Shore who? Shore am glad I brought my sunglasses, the sun is blinding!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tanner. Tanner who? Tanner you want to build a sandcastle, the sooner we can start!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Island. Island who? Island you a drink if you come swim with me!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Current. Current who? Current-ly craving some seafood by the beach!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Palm. Palm who? Palm you a margarita, you deserve a beach break!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Board. Board who? Board? Me too! Let’s go surfing!
