125+ Bird Jokes & Puns: You’ll Fly With Laughter!
Get ready to ruffle your feathers and flock to laughter with this hilarious list of bird jokes and puns! We’ve got the best avian humor, from clever wordplay to side-splitting punchlines that will have you chirping with glee. Did you know a group of owls is called a parliament? Well, prepare to be just as wise after reading these puns – they’re positively egg-cellent!
Top Bird Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks: For Bird Brained Fun!
- Heard about the bird concert? Tickets were cheep!
- Bird’s favorite rapper? Drake.
- Relationship status? In a tweet-heartship.
- What do you get if you cross a bird and a cow? A moos-quito!
- A bird’s favorite Shakespeare play? Tweelfth Night!
- That comedian really ruffled some feathers.
- Why do birds fly south? It’s too far to walk!
- Bird birthday party? It’s going to be lit!
- Bird’s favorite dessert? Pecan pi!
- That punchline really took me by talon.
- I’m feeling fin-tastic!
- Let’s flock to that new restaurant!
- Owl be seeing you!
- Don’t be such a chicken!
- What’s a bird’s favorite type of math? Owlgebra!
- This party is for the birds!
Funny Bird One-Liner Jokes To Make You Fly With Laughter
- I tried starting a dating app for birds, but I couldn’t figure out the algorithm for swallow-bility.
- A bird walks into a library looking for books about paranoia… the librarian whispers, “They’re right behind you!”
- I met this cool birdwatcher today, we really hit it off… I think we’re gonna flock together!
- Why did the bird get in trouble at school? He kept tweeting on his phone during class!
- My friend says owls are amazing at camouflage… I told him, “Yeah, they’re really good at it until you HOOT about it!”
- What’s a bird’s favorite type of math? Owlgebra!
- Two birds are on a perch, and one says to the other, “Can you lend me five bucks?” The other bird replies, “Get outta here, you’re always falcon my feathers!”
- The toucan tried to pay for his meal with his beak, but the cashier said, “Sorry, we don’t accept bills.”
- I wondered why the frisbee kept getting bigger, then it hit me… oh, wait, it was a bird!
- What do you get if you cross a woodpecker and a carrier pigeon? A bird that can deliver messages to your door…. knock, knock!
- Why do birds fly south for winter? Because it’s too far to walk!
- The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese!
- My friend said his parrot could talk four languages… too bad it escaped before he could ask it directions!
- What’s a bird’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good tweet, of course!
QnA Jokes & Puns about Bird: Feathery Funny Business
- Q: What birthday present did the bird give his wife? A: A cheep thrills novel.
- Q: Why did the baby bird get in trouble at school? A: He kept tweeting on his phone in class.
- Q: What did the bird lawyer specialize in? A: Owl sorts of law.
- Q: Did you hear about the bird who loved playing baseball? A: He was always flying out to catch the ball.
- Q: Why are birds so good at poker? A: They always have a bird’s-eye view.
- Q: What music genre do most birds prefer? A: Owl-ternative rock, of course.
- Q: What do you call a group of owls that love to gossip? A: A parliament of busy-bodies!
- Q: Where do birds go when they’re sick? A: The tweetment center!
- Q: What do you call a bird that’s afraid of heights? A: A chicken… duh!
- Q: What do you get if you cross a parrot with a woodpecker? A: A bird that talks your ear off… then drills a hole in it!
- Q: How do birds afford their homes? A: They have nest eggs!
- Q: Why did the lovebirds break up? A: They had too many tweet ups and downs.
- Q: Why was the bird embarrassed at his birthday party? A: Because they were playing “Happy Bird-day” instead of “Happy Birthday!”
- Q: Why did the owl say no to the marriage proposal? A: He didn’t give a hoot!
- Q: What do you call a flock of birds practicing their singing? A: A choir-up!
- Q: Why did the flamingo get in trouble in art class? A: He kept dipping his beak in the paint water!
- Q: Where do birds sleep on vacation? A: In roost-orts, of course!
Dad Jokes about Bird: They’re Truly Fowl
- Why did the bird get in trouble at school? Because he kept disrupting class with his fowl language!
- I wanted to buy a talking parrot for my wife’s birthday… but they only had ones in Mandarin. I guess you could say they were… bird-lingual.
- What kind of bird works at a construction site? A crane!
- Why do birds fly south for the winter? Because it’s too far to walk!
- A bird just flew into my window! I think he’s okay, but he really needs to get twitter his act together.
- Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they’d be called bagels!
- How do you get a bird to like you? Tweet it nicely!
- I used to date a birdwatcher… …but it didn’t work out. We had too many hawks in the relationship.
- What bird always knows the score? A score-crow!
- Did you hear about the bird who was a kleptomaniac? He was always getting into tweet trouble.
- Why did the bird cross the playground? To get to the other slide!
- My son wanted a bird for his birthday… …specifically a bird that could sing and dance. So I got him a record player.
- How did the owls escape their cage? They used a skeleton key!
- What does a bird use to build its house? Tweets – get it? Like tools?
- Why do birds sing in the morning? Because they can’t remember the words at night!
Funny Quotes and Captions about Bird Lovers
- “Just saw a bird carrying a twig… guess you could say he’s really branching out.” 🐦
- “My therapist told me to release the things I can’t control… Guess I’m going to the park with a birdcage.” 🔓🐦
- “If you’re feeling blue, try looking at a robin’s egg instead. Much more inspiring!” 💙🥚
- “What do you call a group of owls making terrible life choices? A parliament of wingnuts.”🦉🤯
- “A bird told me you were talking about me… I’m not chirping mad, just curious.” 🤫🐦
- “Love is like birdwatching: Sometimes it’s all about patience, and sometimes it’s about that unexpected flash of color.” 💖🐦
- “Don’t be a chicken! Unless we’re talking delicious, crispy fried chicken. Then, by all means…” 🍗😅
- “You know you’ve spent too much time online when you start identifying with the confused birds in ‘Wingspan’.” 🐦🎲🙄
- “Looking for the perfect pick-up line… Any suggestions? Asking for a bird of paradise.” 😉🌺
- “What do you get a bird for its birthday? Tweetments!” 🎉🐦🎂
- “Spent all day arguing with a pigeon about a French fry… Guess you could say it was a pretty heated debate.” 🍟🐦🤬
- “My spirit animal is a hummingbird… constantly caffeinated and flitting between shiny objects.” ✨🐦💨
- “Birdwatching is basically the original form of ‘people-watching,’ but with better plumage.” 🕵️♀️🐦
- “Just saw a flock of geese wearing tiny hats… guess it’s a good thing I always keep my camera handy.” 🧢🐦📸
- “Pretty sure my neighbor’s parrot knows my wifi password… Suddenly I’m seeing birdseed ads on all my social media.” 🦜💻🥥
- “Falling in love is easy. Landing safely? Now that’s the real test of a relationship… at least according to the pigeons on my fire escape.” 🕊️❤️🔥🏢
- “Life is short. Eat dessert first, take a chance, and always listen to the birds. They’ve got some chirpin’ good advice.” 🐦🌎🍰
Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Bird: With a Few Feathers Tickling Your Funny Bone
- A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush, but a bird on your head is worth a thousand bewildered looks.
- Early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese. (Because someone has to check for traps, right?)
- Don’t count your chickens before they hatch…unless you’re a very optimistic poultry farmer.
- A bird in the hand makes for a messy handshake.
- You can lead a bird to water, but you can’t make it tweet about your new product. (Influencer marketing is hard, yo.)
- Love is like a bird: let it fly free, unless it’s a flightless bird, then maybe keep an eye on it.
- One good turn deserves another…especially if you’re building a nest.
- Don’t put all your eggs in one basket…unless you’re playing bird bingo, then go for it!
- Patience is a virtue, especially when waiting for a bird to finish its business on your car.
- If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again…unless you’re a bird trying to build a nest on a weather vane.
- Never judge a bird by its feathers…unless it’s wearing a tiny tuxedo. Then you can assume it’s going to a fancy party.
- A happy bird is one who sings after a storm…or after it finally figures out how to open that tricky bird feeder.
- Celebrate every bird-day like it’s your last…because for some birds, it very well might be. (Looking at you, mayflies.)
Bird Double Entendres Puns: A Flock of Funny
- “I tried to start a bird dating app, but I couldn’t figure out the algorithm for lovebirds.” (Plays on the literal and figurative meaning of “lovebirds”)
- “This new birdseed is flying off the shelves! They must have finally cracked the code.” (Plays on the literal act of flying and “flying off the shelves” as a figure of speech)
- “A woodpecker walks into a library and asks the librarian, ‘Got any books on tree-tment?'” (Plays on “treatment” and the bird’s association with trees)
- “Did you hear about the bird who won an award for his amazing plumage? He was really ruffled.” (Plays on the double meaning of “ruffled” as both a style of feathers and a state of being flustered)
- “My parrot is going through a bit of a mid-life crisis. He keeps saying he wants to find his wings.” (Plays on the literal wings and finding one’s purpose in life)
- “Never try to out-flirt a hummingbird. They’re notorious wingmen.” (Plays on the literal wings and “wingman” as someone who helps in romantic pursuits)
- “I took my parrot to the vet because he was looking a little down. The vet said he just needed to chirp up.” (Plays on “chirp” as the bird sound and “cheer up”)
- “You know, birds have it tough. They can never really have a private conversation. It’s always tweet, tweet, tweet.” (Plays on “tweet” as the bird sound and social media posts)
- “My friend said his parrot writes poetry. I told him, ‘Don’t be ridiculous, that’s for the birds!'” (Plays on the phrase meaning “nonsense” and the association with birds)
- “Why don’t pigeons ever get lost? They always know the pecking order of directions!” (Plays on “pecking order” as a hierarchy and birds pecking for food)
- “The owl was a renowned professor. He was truly wise beyond his bird years.” (Plays on “bird years” as a humorous equivalent to “dog years”)
- “Planning a birthday party for my pet parrot is stressful! I just can’t seem to please his specific flock of friends.” (Plays on “flock” as a group of birds and a group of friends)
- “That comedian was hilarious! He had the entire audience eating out of the palm of his…wing? Oh, right.” (Plays on the common expression and birds eating from hands)
- “My girlfriend said she loves me for my ‘bird-like’ qualities. I guess she finds me charming and cheep.” (Plays on “cheep” sounding like “cheap” and birds being charming)
- “What do you call a bird that’s always winning arguments? A superior tweeter.” (Plays on “tweeter” as a bird sound and someone who posts on Twitter)
Funny Bird Tom Swifties: Feathered Friends & Feline Phrases
- “That owl looks awfully wise,” Tom said w-owl-y.
- “Did you see that hummingbird disappear?” Tom asked swiftly.
- “My parrot just told me a secret!” Tom exclaimed cheeply.
- “This birdhouse is poorly made,” Tom said wren-chfully.
- “That toucan has a big bill,” Tom remarked bill-ingly.
- “My pet finch passed away,” Tom sang sorrow-fully.
- “Look at all those birds together,” Tom chirped, flock-ingly.
- “That eagle is a majestic sight!” Tom declared baldly.
- “I love watching birds migrate south for the winter,” Tom said swallow-ly.
- “My birthday party is going to be bird-themed,” Tom announced party-cularly.
- “I’m so happy two lovebirds found each other,” Tom cooed dove-ly.
- “I just adopted a parrot who only speaks Spanish,” Tom said para-tially.
- “That ostrich buried its head in the sand really fast!” Tom said ostrich-ly.
- “I think that pigeon is winking at me,” Tom said flirt-atiously.
- “That bird just stole my sandwich!” Tom cried hawk-ishly.
- “I wonder what kind of music birds like to listen to,” Tom pondered melodi-ously.
Knock-Knock Jokes about Bird You’ll Love
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird-day greetings, hope your celebration is tweet!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird you say you weren’t coming? I’ve got plenty of seed!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird your tongue! Don’t tell anyone about this nest egg.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird-lieve it or not, I saw a cat stuck in a tree!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird-ter late than never, right? What’s a flock got to do to get some service around here?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird your own business! This worm is mine.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird-y careful, that branch looks weak!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird-haps we can catch a movie later, I heard “Free Guy” is good.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird-a-licious! This pie is amazing!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird-watching isn’t just for the birds you know, it’s quite fascinating!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird you just see that worm do a backflip?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird as a feather, light as a… oh, you know the rest.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird’s the word on the street, spring is coming early!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird up! This nest isn’t going to build itself!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird your sweet time, I’ve only been waiting here all day!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bird. Bird who? Bird of a feather flock together, want to join my crew?
