120+ Book Jokes & Puns: A Novelly Funny List

Get ready to laugh your binding off because you’ve opened up the best list of book jokes and puns this side of the library! We’ve got a novel approach to humor with a collection of clever and positive jokes that are sure to tickle your funny bone. Did you know that the world’s smallest book is only 2.4 x 2.9 millimeters? Don’t worry, this list is much easier to read, and much funnier too! Get ready to explore the lighter side of literature with these hilarious book-related puns. You’ll be “booked” for a good time!

Top Book Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks: Page-Turners You Have to Read

I’m friends with all the library books… we’re well-read.
What did the bookworm say after finishing a good meal? “That was delicious, chapter.”
Did you hear about the book thief who escaped on a boat? He was booked for a novel getaway.
I love reading books about anti-gravity… I just can’t put them down!
Did you hear about the librarian who got fired? Apparently, he was caught shelving books under “Fiction” that he didn’t think were very good.
I’m starting a band called “Booked Solid”… we’ll be fully booked in no time.
What’s a bookworm’s favorite dance move? The Bookworm Boogie!
Just finished writing a horror novel… it’s terrifyingly good.
Two books walk into a bar. One says, “Ouch, that hurt my spine!”
I’m writing a book about all the things I should be doing instead… It’s called “Procrastination Projects.”
What did the book say to the movie adaptation? “Hey, don’t judge a book by its cover… or its script.”
Just bought a book about telepathy… It’s already on the same page as me.
Always wanted to date someone who works at a library… they’d be so well-read.
My therapist told me to express my feelings more. So I wrote a strongly worded letter to a dictionary.
I tried starting a book club… but we keep getting distracted by the wine.

Funny Book Jokes With One Liner Clever Book Puns at PunnyFunny.com

Funny Book One-Liner Jokes: Guaranteed to Bookworm Your Way into Laughter

I tried to join a book club for introverts, but they told me to get published!
I saw a sign that said “Watch for flying books!” …Seems like someone needs to organize their shelves.
My bank account is like a great book these days… always short a chapter.
I wanted to name my dog “Bookmark,” but that felt too ruff.
Tried to make a reservation at a library-themed restaurant… Turns out they were fully booked!
You could say I’m addicted to buying books, but I can quit anytime I want… Just one more chapter!
What do you call a book that’s always getting into trouble? A storybook thug!
I finally finished writing a book about procrastination… Now, where did I put that motivation to get it published?
Just finished reading a book about anti-gravity… I couldn’t put it down!
What’s a librarian’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good book drop!
My doctor told me to take it easy and read a book… so, I’m learning to speed-read medical textbooks!
I wrote a book about a ship made of pancakes sailing down a river of syrup… It’s a breakfast novel.
Why aren’t books good dancers? Because they have two left pages!
Never judge a book by its movie… unless it’s a pop-up book, then all bets are off.
Borrowing money from a friend is like borrowing a great book: You should always return it in the same condition you received it.
They say reading can broaden your horizons… Explains why my bookshelf collapsed.
I like my books like I like my coffee – full of adventure and with a spine.

QnA Jokes & Puns about Book: Read Between the Lines

Q: Why did the librarian slip and fall? A: He was caught in the non-friction section!
Q: What do you call a book about a kleptomaniac hamster? A: “Catch Me If You Can… Carry All This”
Q: What’s a bookworm’s worst nightmare? A: A cliff-hanger ending… with no pages left!
Q: Heard about the romance novel set in the library? A: I heard it was long overdue for a happy ending.
Q: What do you say to a book that’s feeling down? A: “Hey, don’t worry, we all have our spines broken sometimes.”
Q: Why don’t vampires like reading? A: They only get caught up in the plot… bloodlines!
Q: I just finished a book about anti-gravity. A: It was impossible to put down!
Q: What kind of books do eggs like? A: Ones with attractive yolks!
Q: I want to write a book about procrastination… A: Just give me a minute. I’ll get started tomorrow.
Q: Did you hear about the book club that broke up? A: They couldn’t agree on a common volume.
Q: Why did the book go to the doctor? A: It had too many chapters and felt crummy!
Q: I met a girl at the library. We talked for hours about our favorite authors… A: I think it’s the start of a new chapter!
Q: Why was the librarian promoted? A: She brought in an outstanding amount of overdues!
Q: What did the bookmark say to the book? A: “I’m here to hold your place, don’t get wrapped up in yourself!”
Q: I love books about Swiss cheese… A: But they’re full of holes in the plot!
Q: Why didn’t the book cross the road? A: It was too engrossed in its own story!
Q: How do you make a book disappear? A: Tell a kid it’s for school!

Dad Jokes about Book: Guaranteed to Shelf You

Me: I just finished reading a book about anti-gravity. You: Cool! What’d you think? Me: I couldn’t put it down!
You: What do you call a book that’s always wet? Me: A “Moisture”able Read.
You: Why did the book go to the doctor? Me: It had a spine problem.
You: I want to write a book about a hamburger. Me: Sounds like a great story, but you’ll need a good patty line!
You: Did you hear about the book club for cannibals? Me: I heard it was difficult to find new members. They just devour everyone!
You: Did you hear about the bookkeeper who ran off with his client’s money? Me: Yeah, they say he’s quite the “novel” criminal!
You: I’m trying to come up with a good username, something book-related. Any ideas? Me: How about “Bookmark This”?
You: What’s a librarian’s favorite type of music? Me: Anything with a good book report!
You: Why are book covers always so close together? Me: They just can’t seem to put any space between them!
You: I met someone who reads at least ten books a week! Me: Wow, they must have a novel approach to time management.
You: Why did the library have to close early? Me: Because they were completely booked!
You: What do you call a romantic book about a chef? Me: “The Spice of My Life”
You: What did the bookmark say to the page? Me: Don’t worry, I’ve got you covered!
You: Did you hear about the kidnapping at the library? Me: Yeah, I hear they’ve got the suspect booked!
You: This book is way too long! Me: Don’t worry, I’m sure it has a plot somewhere!
You: Why don’t skeletons like reading? Me: Because they don’t have the stomach for spine-chilling stories!

Funny Quotes and Captions about Book Lovers

“My therapist told me to turn to a new page. I told her I dog-eared it already, what else is new?”
“I only judge a book after I’ve pretended to read it in public.”
“Sure, I have a “to-be-read” pile. It’s more of a “to-be-admired-from-afar” tower, really.”
“Dating apps are just like libraries, except the return policy is way more complicated.”
“I’m not saying I read a lot, but my bookmark collection could rival a museum.”
“Just finished a 1,000-page book. My biceps are sore, but my vocabulary is swole.” 💪
“Sleep? Who needs sleep when you have a book with a plot twist you need to get to? (Don’t answer that, my doctor.)”
“You say ‘hoarder,’ I say ‘curator of well-loved literature.’ We are not the same.”
“Broke my New Year’s resolution of reading more. Turns out “scrolling” doesn’t count.”
“That awkward moment when you accidentally call your significant other by your book boyfriend’s name….”
“Always trust a book with worn-out pages. It’s seen things.”
“Warning: Reading may lead to sudden outbursts of laughter, gasps of shock, and uncontrollable sobbing in public places. You’ve been warned.”
“Can’t talk right now, lost in a good book. Literally. I think I wandered into Narnia.”
“Me trying to explain the plot of the book I just finished reading is basically interpretive dance accompanied by incoherent mumbling.”
“Some people collect stamps. Others collect coins. I collect unfinished books. I have a very specific taste in disappointment.”
“My bank account may not be very “well-read,” but my bookshelf sure is.”
“I like my men like I like my books: with captivating stories, a touch of mystery, and preferably available in paperback.”

Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Book Lovers

A book in hand is worth two on your TBR list. (Because let’s be honest, that TBR list is a fickle beast.)
Don’t put off until tomorrow the book you can escape into today. (Procrastination is for real life, not fictional worlds.)
Early to bed and early to rise makes a person read a whole book in one sitting, no lies. (We’ve all been there.)
A penny saved is a penny earned, but a book bought is a soul enriched. (Invest in yourself, folks!)
Don’t cry over spilled milk when you could be crying over a devastatingly beautiful plot twist. (Priorities, people.)
Two wrongs don’t make a right, but two books in one day? Now you’re talking. (The only math we’re interested in.)
Better to have loved and lost a library book than never to have read at all. (Okay, maybe not. Return your books, everyone!)
You can’t make an omelette without breaking some spines…wait, scratch that. (Treat your books with care!)
A watched pot never boils, and a rushed book never truly captivates. (Take your time and savor the story.)
The early bird gets the worm, but the night owl finishes the entire book. (Shhh, don’t tell anyone.)
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but a book a day keeps reality at bay. (And sometimes, that’s exactly what we need.)
Don’t count your chickens before they hatch, count your pages after you’ve been sucked into a truly captivating story. (Because time flies when you’re having fun… and reading.)
Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither was your to-be-read pile. (It’s a marathon, not a sprint.)

Book Double Entendres Puns: A Novel Idea

“I’m completely booked this weekend, but feel free to come over and stare longingly at my bookshelf.” (Busy, but hinting at their love of books)
“She said she was looking for a book with a strong plot. Little did she know, I was building her a library.” (Misinterpreting “plot” for land)
“I told my friend her taste in books was questionable. She said it was an open book, just like her relationship status.” (Implying both are open to interpretation)
“I saw a sign that said ‘Book Lovers Only’. Guess my illiteracy got me kicked out of another library.” (Ironically pointing out the absurdity of the sign)
“He had a real way with words. Too bad he used them all on writing terrible pickup lines in the library.” (Playing on the double meaning of “way with words”)
“My therapist told me to express my feelings more. Now I leave strongly worded suggestions in the library’s suggestion box.” (Humorously exaggerating expressing feelings)
“They say you can’t judge a book by its cover. But you can judge a person by their bookshelf… and run away quickly.” (Adding a funny twist to the original saying)
“I wanted to join a book club, but they rejected me. Apparently, ‘reading Wikipedia summaries’ doesn’t count as ‘literature’.” (Mocking pretentious book clubs)
“This book is so good, it’s illegal! …Or maybe it’s just overdue at the library by a couple of decades.” (Playing on the different meanings of “illegal”)
“I tried to check out a book on time travel, but the librarian said it wasn’t written yet. Classic paradox.” (Humorous take on the concept of time travel)
“My love life is like a poorly written book – predictable, full of plot holes, and nobody wants a sequel.” (Self-deprecating humor using book metaphors)
“My doctor told me to take things one page at a time. I told him I’m already reading five books simultaneously, so he needs to chill.” (Misinterpreting the advice literally)
“I tried speed dating at the library. It was like speed reading, but with more awkward silences and disappointed sighs.” (Comparing two different types of “speed”)
“You could say I’m addicted to books. Luckily, my dealer has excellent prices and a very lenient return policy.” (Comparing a librarian to a drug dealer)
“I told everyone my new book was going to be a real page-turner. Turns out they were right, at least about turning the page to avoid my writing.” (Humorous twist on the phrase “page-turner”)

Funny Book Tom Swifties: A Novel Idea

“This novel has so many plot twists!” exclaimed Tom, bookishly.
“I can’t believe they made a movie out of this!” said Tom, adaptedly.
“The ending was so predictable,” Tom said, forewardly.
“I think I’ll start a book club,” suggested Tom, clubbily.
“This author’s really prolific,” Tom observed, voluminously.
“That was a real page-turner!” Tom exclaimed, rapidly.
“I loved the part about the library,” Tom said, shelfishly.
“I wonder what happens in the sequel?” Tom pondered, sequentially.
“This character is so relatable,” cried Tom, characteristically.
“I can’t choose between a paperback and hardcover,” Tom said, bindingly.
“Have you seen the new Jane Austen adaptation?” Tom asked, classically.
“This story has a great message,” said Tom, morally.
“The villain in this is so complex!” Tom exclaimed, antagonistically.
“I left my bookmark at home!” Tom cried, unmarkedly.
“I love getting lost in a good story,” Tom said, literarily.
“These plot points are all over the place!” Tom said, disjointedly.
“This book is a true masterpiece,” Tom declared, masterfully.

Knock-Knock Jokes about Book Lovers

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Book. Book who? Book us a table for two, this pun’s got me hungry for more!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Book. Book who? Don’t you recognize me? Book your calendars, it’s story time!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Book. Book who? Book me a flight, this pun’s taking off!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Book. Book who? Book yourself a massage, your brain’s working overtime on that one!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Book. Book who? Don’t be a bookworm, share the laughs!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Book. Book who? Book a cruise, this pun deserves a vacation!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Book. Book who? Book of world records, here we come with this pun!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Book. Book who? You’ve been Book-ed! Now laugh at this hilarious pun!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Book. Book who? Book-lieve it or not, that’s the last one!