125+ Purr-fect Cat Jokes & Puns to Make You Laugh

Get ready to unleash your inner feline fanatic, because we’ve got the purrfect list of cat jokes and puns that will leave you feline good! This is the best medicine for a bad day – a collection of clever and hilarious cat-themed humor that’s pawsitive to brighten your mood. Did you know that a group of kittens is called a ‘kindle’? Get ready to be ignited with laughter as we dive into a world of cat-tastic puns and jokes!

Top Cat Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks: Purrfectly Hilarious

1. What do you call a cat that loves heights? A scaredy-cat! 😹
2. “I’m not fat,” said the cat. “I’m just a little fur-tunate.” 😸
3. What’s a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple! 💜
4. Why don’t cats ever play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs! 🐆
5. Just saw a cat run across a keyboard. Hope it wasn’t writing a novel! 🙀
6. I tried to explain to my cat why he can’t join the police academy… He didn’t make the cut! 👮‍♂️😿
7. What do you call a cat that loves bowling? An alley cat! 🎳
8. My cat thinks he’s a detective. He’s always pawing for clues. 🐾
9. I took my cat to the vet. He said, “He’s got cat-aracts!” 👓
10. What’s a cat’s favorite magazine? Good Mousekeeping! 📖
11. My cat’s breath is terrible. It’s fur-ocious! 🙀💨
12. What’s a cat’s favorite dessert? Mice cream! 🍦
13. Why was the cat sitting on the computer? Looking for a mouse! 🖱️
14. My cat is a great dancer. He’s got cat-like reflexes! 🕺
15. What’s a cat’s favorite musical instrument? A cat-tar! 🎸
16. “You’ve cat to be kitten me!” exclaimed the surprised feline. 😂
17. My cat is so lazy…He’s feline kinda paw-sitive about it. 😴

Funny Cat One-Liner Jokes: Purrfectly Hiss-terical Puns

1. I tried to explain to my cat that it’s not called “catch” but he just wouldn’t listen.
2. What’s a cat burglar’s favorite color? Burgundy.
3. My cat’s breath is so bad, I named him Scope.
4. My friend told me he was going to open a cat cafe… I was like, “Don’t you mean a cattery?”
5. My cat thinks he’s a detective. He’s always following clues and looking for the purr-petrator.
6. Cats are so dramatic. It’s always “The End of the World Meow.”
7. You can’t trust atoms, they make up everything…. especially cats.
8. I asked my cat for relationship advice. He just looked at me and said, “You gotta be kitten me.”
9. What do you call a cat that loves to bowl? An alley cat!
10. My veterinarian told me I should combine my cat’s food and water. Now he eats soup.
11. My cat is so lazy, he just lays around all day and plots world domination… in his dreams.
12. I’m convinced my cat is part-human… mostly because he steals my seat the second I get up.
13. My cat brought a dead mouse to my doorstep. I guess he’s saying, “You’re cat to be kitten me!”
14. What’s a cat’s favorite magazine? “Good Mousekeeping.”
15. My cat is writing a book… It’s a meow-moir.
16. Never play poker with a cat. They’re terrible bluffers… and they always have an ace up their sleeve.
17. Why are cats such bad dancers? Because they have two left feet!

QnA Jokes & Puns about Cat: Purrfectly Pawsome Edition

1. Q: What do you call a cat that loves to bowl? A: An alley cat!
2. Q: What’s a cat’s favorite color? A: Purr-ple!
3. Q: Why did the cat get a job at the library? A: It was a natural at cataloging books.
4. Q: What do you call a cat that’s always getting into trouble? A: A paw-ty animal!
5. Q: What’s a cat’s favorite magazine? A: “A Meow-gazine”, of course!
6. Q: Why don’t cats play poker in the jungle? A: Too many cheetahs!
7. Q: What’s a cat’s favorite type of footwear? A: Sneakers, they’re very paw-pular!
8. Q: How does a cat from Texas say hello? A: “Meowdy, partner!”
9. Q: Why did the cat bring a ladder to the library? A: To reach the highest bookshelf, they heard it had a great meow-noir!
10. Q: Why are cats such bad poker players? A: They have a tell-tail sign when they’re bluffing!
11. Q: What do you call a cat that wins a dog show? A: A CAT-astrophy!
12. Q: Why don’t cats like online shopping? A: They prefer using their paws to get a feel for the meow-chandise.
13. Q: What do you call a cat that loves to sing? A: A purr-former!
14. Q: What’s a cat’s favorite movie genre? A: Anything with a captivating claw-t!
15. Q: What do you call a cat that runs a coffee shop? A: The head barista-cat!
16. Q: Why did the cat get lost in the library? A: It was looking for books by Mark Twain and Charles Dik-cat!
17. Q: What do you call a cat that’s always getting into fights? A: A cat-tastrophe waiting to happen!

Dad Jokes about Cat: Purrfectly Pawful

1. Why don’t cats play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs!
2. I thought my cat was going deaf, then I realized… he’s just been ignoring me this whole time.
3. What do you call a cat that loves bowling? An alley cat!
4. What’s a cat’s favorite color? Purr-ple!
5. My son asked me for a cat for his birthday… so I got him a Caterpillar construction hat. He’s going to be so disappointed!
6. I used to think my cat was lazy… Turns out, he’s just a purr-crastinator!
7. I asked my cat for some financial advice. He just looked at me and said, “Just kitten!”
8. Did you hear about the cat that won an award for bravery? He was feline good!
9. What’s a cat’s favorite magazine? A cat-alogue, of course.
10. My wife thinks our cat has a gambling problem. I told her, “Honey, just let him play. He’s bound to land on his feet!”
11. Where do cats learn to sail? At a cat-amaran school.
12. I saw a sign that said “Cat for Sale, Eats Anything!” I thought, “Now that’s a deal that’s hard to beat!”
13. Why was the cat sitting on the computer? Looking for a mouse!
14. What do you call a cat that loves to sing? A meow-sician!
15. My cat swallowed my remote control. I’m just flipping out over here!
16. Why are cats such bad dancers? Because they’ve got two left feet!
17. Why don’t cats like online shopping? They prefer using their cat-alogues!

Funny Quotes and Captions about Cat: Purrfectly Hilarious

1. My cat thinks she’s a therapist. Either that, or my life is just one big “tell me more” session. 😹🛋️
2. “Hold on, I need to supervise this nap,” – My cat, probably. 💤🐱
3. Sure, I could exercise today… or I could watch my cat cough up a hairball in slow motion. 🤔😹🤢
4. Just saw my cat staring intently at a wall. Pretty sure he’s figured out the meaning of life. Or maybe there’s a fly. Who knows? 👽🐈‍⬛
5. My bank account is proof that I work hard. My cat’s lifestyle is proof that I don’t work hard enough. 💸🐱👑
6. Cat hair is my glitter. It just makes everything more…sparkly? ✨😹
7. Sleep is for the weak. Unless you’re a cat. Then it’s basically an Olympic Sport. 😹🥇😴
8. Relationship Status: Owned by a cat. 💕🐈‍⬛
9. My therapist told me to find a hobby to relieve stress. Turns out, watching my cat judge me silently is surprisingly therapeutic. 😌🧘‍♀️🐱
10. I’m not saying my cat is spoiled, but he has his own personal masseuse. Me. I’m his personal masseuse. 💆‍♀️🐈‍⬛
11. Don’t be fooled by the cuteness. My cat is fluent in passive-aggressive meows. 🗣️😹😠
12. My cat is like a furry alarm clock. Except instead of an alarm, it uses tiny daggers for claws at 5 am. ⏰😹⚔️
13. Cats are like potato chips. You can’t have just one. And they both end up all over your couch. 🥔😹🛋️
14. I’m convinced my cat thinks “meow” is my name. To be fair, he’s probably right. 😹🙋‍♀️
15. My cat is judging your life choices. And frankly, I think he agrees with me. 🤨😹👎
16. Life is too short to be serious all the time. Unless you’re a cat. Then it’s perfectly acceptable. 😎😹
17. “I love you,” I whispered to my cat. He blinked slowly and then rubbed his butt on my face. Ah, romance! 🥰🐈‍⬛ 😹

Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Cat: Purrfectly Clever Quips

1. A catnap a day keeps the vacuum cleaner away. (Because who wants to disturb a sleeping kitty… and stir up a cloud of fur tumbleweeds?)
2. Don’t count your catnip before it’s stored in a cat-proof container. (Those furry ninjas are sneaky!)
3. Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back with nine lives to spare. (Gotta love that feline resilience!)
4. The early bird gets the worm, but the cat gets the nap in the sunbeam. (Priorities, people!)
5. All that glitters is not gold, sometimes it’s just a stray sunbeam catching your cat’s eye. (And causing a frenzy of paw-swatting action.)
6. Never judge a cat by its meows, unless it’s a hairball hack, then run for cover. (Some sounds are universal warnings.)
7. A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush, but a cat in the house thinks it owns everything. (And they’re not entirely wrong.)
8. You can lead a cat to water, but getting it to do the backstroke is another story. (Good luck with that!)
9. Where there’s a catnap, there’s a way. (They’re experts at finding the comfiest spots.)
10. When the cat’s away, the mice will play. When the cat’s home, the mice become phantom ninjas. (Seriously, where do they disappear to?!)
11. A watched cat never uses the litter box. (It’s like they have a sixth sense for privacy invasion.)
12. The only thing predictable about a cat is its unpredictability. (Embrace the chaos!)
13. Don’t cry over spilled milk, unless the cat pushed it over. Then, feel free to unleash a dramatic sigh. (They’re masters of innocent mischief.)
14. Life is like a box of cat toys… full of surprises and feathers. (And the occasional disappearing mouse.)
15. You can’t buy love, but you can adopt a cat and increase your chances exponentially. (Those furry overlords are masters of manipulation… and love.)
16. To truly understand a cat, you must think like a cat… which mostly involves naps and strategically placed hairballs. (It’s a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it.)

Cat Double Entendres Puns to Make You Purr with Laughter

1. “I tried to take my cat to a cat cafe, but they said he was ‘banned’ from the premises. Seems he was stirring up too much catnip in the establishment.” (Banned – referring to both a ban and a cat’s vocalization)
2. “She was smitten with the handsome feline, whispering, ‘You’re the cat’s meow.’ Little did she know, he literally was.” (The cat’s meow – both a term of endearment and a literal sound)
3. “The veterinarian’s business was struggling until he hired a new marketing manager. Now, business is ‘booming’.” (Booming – referring to increased success and a loud cat sound)
4. “He tried to explain that he wasn’t lazy, just ‘feline’ under the weather. She wasn’t buying it.” (Feline – referring to feeling unwell and the cat family)
5. “The cat burglar was so good, he could ‘scratch’ a diamond without leaving a trace.” (Scratch – referring to stealing and a cat’s action)
6. “Their relationship was going swimmingly until they had a huge ‘cat fight’ over a hairball on the carpet.” (Cat fight – referring to an argument and literal fighting cats)
7. “The aspiring chef wanted to open a restaurant called ‘The Purrfect Bite’, specializing in gourmet cat food.” (The Purrfect Bite – a play on “perfect” and a cat’s bite)
8. “The detective noticed tiny ‘paw prints’ all over the crime scene. Clearly, this was no ordinary criminal.” (Paw Prints – referring to animal tracks and evidence left by a thief)
9. “The cat fashion show was a disaster. The models kept ‘hissing’ at each other and refusing to walk the catwalk.” (Hissing – referring to both a cat’s sound and angry whispering)
10. “The self-help guru’s latest book, ‘Embrace Your Inner Kitten,’ was flying off the shelves. ” (Embrace Your Inner Kitten – playing on finding inner peace and a literal young cat)
11. “The rock concert was so loud, the band was accused of ‘caterwauling’ all night long.” (Caterwauling – referring to both loud music and a cat’s howl)
12. “He promised her a ‘purrfectly’ romantic evening, complete with a candlelit dinner and a new scratching post.” (Purrfectly – a play on perfect and a cat’s purr)
13. “The spy received a coded message: ‘The eagle flies at midnight. Beware the catnap.’ He knew trouble was brewing.” (Catnap – referring to both a short sleep and a cat’s abduction)
14. “She found him curled up on the sofa, looking extremely ‘paw-lite’. Apparently, someone had forgotten their dinner.” (Paw-lite – a play on “polite” and a cat’s paw/lack of food)
15. “They called him the ‘Cat Whisperer’ of Wall Street, able to predict the stock market with uncanny accuracy.” (Cat Whisperer – someone who understands cats and someone who understands an unpredictable market)
16. “I wanted to create a dating app for cats, but I couldn’t figure out how to monetize catnip microtransactions.” (Catnip Microtransactions – a play on in-app purchases and a cat’s love for catnip)

Funny Cat Tom Swifties: Paw-sitively Hilarious

1. “I think I need to adopt another kitten,” Tom said categorically.
2. “This catnip is potent!” Tom exclaimed catatonically.
3. “Watch me jump over this box!” Tom declared catapultingly.
4. “I caught a mouse!” Tom boasted catastrophically.
5. “Are you going to finish that tuna?” Tom asked categorically.
6. “I love napping in sunbeams,” Tom purred catholically.
7. “This scratching post is perfect!” Tom praised cataclysmically.
8. “Excuse me, I need to use the litter box,” Tom announced catacombically.
9. “I think I saw a dog outside,” Tom hissed catechistically.
10. “This collar is itchy,” Tom grumbled catastrophically.
11. “Those birds are taunting me!” Tom screeched catatonically.
12. “They’re serving salmon tonight!” Tom meowed catechumenally.
13. “I’m the king of the jungle gym,” Tom proclaimed cathedrally.
14. “I think it’s time for a nap,” Tom yawned catastrophically.
15. “Did you just open a can of tuna?” Tom perked up catacoustically.
16. “This yarn is so soft!” Tom purred cataclysmically.
17. “I’m ready for my close-up,” Tom posed catwalkily.

Knock-Knock Jokes about Cat: Purr-Fectly Hilarious

1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Kitten. Kitten who? Quit kitten around and let me in!
2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Alpaca. Alpaca who? Alpaca the snacks, you bring the catnip!
3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Howard. Howard who? Howard you like to be a cat, napping all day?
4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cash. Cash who? Cash me outside, how ’bout meow?!
5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in! It’s cold out here for a cat!
6. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Paws. Paws who? Paws for a moment and appreciate this adorable cat!
7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cleo. Cleo who? Cleo-patra wasn’t the only one who loved cats!
8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Felix. Felix who? Felix like making biscuits on my lap!
9. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ben. Ben who? Ben working on my cat-itude all day!
10. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Whiskers. Whiskers who? Whiskers the way to the catnip, I forget!
11. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Purr. Purr who? Purr-fect timing! I just opened a can of tuna!
12. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Claw. Claw who? Claw-ful lot of meows coming from inside, is everything okay?
13. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Meow. Meow who? You’re barking up the wrong tree, I’m a cat person!
14. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Nyan. Nyan who? Nyan cat says it’s time for a snack break!
15. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Kitten. Kitten who? Kitten you see, I’m hilarious!
16. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tail. Tail who? Tail we meet again, my feline friend!