Get Giggles & Greet with 135+ Punny Jokes for Greeting Cards!

🎉🤪 Hey there, jokesters! Looking for some clever and hilarious ways to brighten up your greeting cards? Look no further, because we’ve got a list of the best puns about greeting cards that will have you and your kids in stitches! Who says greeting cards have to be all mushy and sentimental? Sprinkle some humor and funny jokes into your messages and you’ll spread positive vibes and laughter everywhere. Get ready to have a card-full of fun! 🃏😂

Spread Joy & Laughter: Our Top “Greeting Card” Picks

“You’re my forever and always – now let’s make our cards a-Johnny Cash!” 🎵
“Roses are red, violets are blue, I couldn’t find a card funny enough for you – until this one!” 🌹
“I know we may not see eye to eye on everything, but let’s agree on one thing – these cards are on point.” 👀
“Happy birthday to my favorite pun enthusiast – I couldn’t resist sending this card your way!” 😜
“You may be one year older, but you’re still as sharp as a card’s edge.” 🎂
“All I need in life is love, laughter, and really great greeting cards. Luckily, I have you.” ❤️
“Just a reminder that you’re worth more than a basic Hallmark card – but this one will have to do.” 💰
“I hope your day is as bright and colorful as these obnoxiously cute cards.” 🌈
“I wasn’t sure what kind of card to get you, so I just went with the one that made me laugh the most.” 😂
“I may not have a lot of money, but I’m rich in hilarious cards and good friends like you.” 💸
“Happy Father’s Day to the punniest dad around – I hope this card measures up to your standards.” 👨‍👧‍👦
“You have a heart of gold and the sense of humor of a stand-up comic – that’s why I chose this card for you.” 💛

funny Greeting Card jokes with one liner clever Greeting Card puns at PunnyFunny.com

Spread Smiles with These Hilarious Greeting Card Jokes

“Happy birthday! Age is just a number, but wrinkles are definitely not.”
“Congratulations on your new home! Remember, a mortgage is just a fancy word for adulting.”
“Welcome to the quarter-life crisis club. We have wine and existential dread.”
“Happy anniversary! Here’s to many more years of pretending to listen to each other.”
“Thinking of you during this tough time. Let’s get through it together… with lots of wine.”
“Congratulations on your promotion! Can I have your old job?”
“Sending you good vibes and glitter, because let’s face it, glitter makes everything better.”
“Happy retirement! Time to trade in your briefcase for a beach bag.”
“You’re getting married? I’ll be there with tissues and a flask.”
“Just because you’re getting older doesn’t mean you have to grow up. Happy birthday!”
“Sending love and virtual hugs your way. Just pretend it’s not from a socially awkward aunt.”
“Congrats on your new baby! Time to trade in your hours of sleep for endless diaper changes.”
“Hey, congrats on graduating! Now you get a piece of paper that says you’re qualified for adulting.”
“Happy Easter! Even if you’re too old for an egg hunt, you’re never too old for chocolate.” 🐰🍫

Send a Smile: QnA Jokes & Puns about Greeting Cards

Q: What did the greeting card say to the envelope? A: “Put a stamp on it, we’re going places!” 💌
Q: Why did the greeting card go to therapy? A: It couldn’t handle all the emotional baggage 🙈
Q: What did the greeting card say to the birthday cake? A: “Let’s make this celebration extra sweet!” 🎂
Q: Why was the greeting card feeling lonely? A: Because it was just a card without a present 🙁
Q: How does a greeting card get fit? A: It does paper aerobics! 🏋️‍♀️
Q: What do you call a greeting card for basketball players? A: A hoopla card 🏀
Q: Why did the greeting card go on a diet? A: It was getting too sappy 🌳
Q: What’s a greeting card’s favorite kind of music? A: Post-pop! 🎶
Q: Why did the greeting card send itself to the printing press? A: It wanted to make a good impression 🖨️
Q: What did the Valentine’s Day card say to the love letter? A: “You’ve got mail!” 💕
Q: How does a greeting card greet its friends? A: “I’m so glad we’re stuck together!” 🤝
Q: What did the greeting card say after a long day at the store? A: “I’m all card out!” 🛍️
Q: Why did the greeting card feel embarrassed at the party? A: It was the odd one out without an envelope 🤦‍♀️
Q: What do you call a greeting card that’s also a puzzle? A: A card-enigma 🧩

Dad Jokes about Greeting Card: Punny Paper Pleasantries

“Why did the greeting card go on vacation? It needed a little R & R.”
“What do you call a greeting card that cheers you up? A ‘feel card’!”
“I bought a pack of cards that said ‘Happy Birthday’ but they all arrived blank… must have been a typo.”
“Why did the greeting card get arrested? It was too cheesy.”
“I gave my dad a Father’s Day card with a superhero on it. He said, ‘thanks for the cape-ital gift!'”
“What did the greeting card say when it saw its reflection? ‘Envelope of the beholder.'”
“I got a card that said ‘Thinking of You’ but I wasn’t sure if I should take it literally or not.”
“Why don’t seagulls like sending greeting cards? They prefer airmail.”
“What did the greeting card say when it was feeling down? ‘I’m just a little envelope-yoped.'”
“Did you hear about the greeting card that went hiking? It got lost in the fold.”
“I tried making a card for my mom but it ended up being a fail-terpiece.”
“My wife said she wanted a romantic card for our anniversary… I just wrote ‘I love meow and furever.'”
“What’s a greeting card’s favorite type of music? E-card-i B.”
“I gave my friend a ‘missing you’ card but she didn’t even notice it was gone.”

Add Some Humor to Your Greeting Card: Funny Quotes!

“Roses are red, violets are blue, this card is funny and so are you. Happy anniversary!”
“If life is a greeting card, your birthday would definitely be the ‘Happy’ part. The ‘Ending’ part is yet to come. Happy birthday!”
“I wanted to get you a good card for your birthday, but then I remembered I have a great sense of humor. Consider this your gift. You’re welcome.”
“A good friend will remember your birthday and send you a card. A best friend will forget your birthday, but still send you a super belated card to make you laugh. Happy late birthday!”
“If greeting cards were like Facebook, yours would definitely get the most likes!”
“I’m sorry I missed your birthday, but I didn’t want to give you a card that said ‘belated.’ So here’s one that says ‘I was totally thinking of you on your birthday.'”
“They say laughter is the best medicine, so consider this card a prescription for your birthday.”
“I’m not saying you’re old, but if this greeting card was a human, it would be old enough to buy its own alcohol. Happy birthday!”
“Celebrating [insert holiday or occasion] together is like reading a greeting card together, except instead of reading it, we’re living it!”
“You know you’re getting old when you start receiving more cards than gifts for your birthday. Don’t worry, this one’s both.”
“They say money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy a pretty decent greeting card. So here’s to your happiness on [insert occasion]!”
“A wise man once said, ‘The best things in life are free.’ Obviously, he never received a funny greeting card.”
“Love is like a greeting card, it’s cheesy and cliché but we can’t help but adore it. Happy Valentine’s Day!”
“I can’t keep calm, it’s your birthday! So instead of a calm and boring greeting card, here’s one that’s loud, funny, and filled with love. Happy birthday!”

Laughing all the way to the card aisle: Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Greeting Cards

“A greeting card a day keeps the madness at bay, but a whole box can drive you insane.”
“When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Then write a funny saying on a greeting card and sell it.”
“A good greeting card is like a good fart, it stinks just enough to make you laugh.”
“A greeting card that says ‘you’re old’ is like a slap in the face, minus the physical pain.”
“Roses are red, violets are blue, I forgot your special day, sorry ’bout that #greetingcardfail.”
“They say money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy a really funny greeting card.”
“You can’t please everyone, but a humorous greeting card comes pretty close.”
“A greeting card with a heartfelt message is nice, but one with a witty pun is even better.”
“Life is too short to take seriously, so send out ridiculous greeting cards and spread the laughter.”
“Forget diamonds, greeting cards are a girl’s best friend.”
“A greeting card is like a mini vacation, it takes you away from reality for a few seconds.”
“If laughter is the best medicine, then greeting cards are the pharmacies.”
“You know what’s better than a hug? A greeting card that makes you snort with laughter.”
“Friends are like greeting cards, they make every occasion a little brighter.”
“When in doubt, send a greeting card with a quote that makes you sound wise.”

Double the Fun with Greeting Card Pun!

“I heard you’re feeling a bit down in the dumps, so I got you this card to lift your spirits (and maybe your rear)!”
“Cheers to another birthday! May your wine glass always be half full (of wine, of course).”
“Congratulations on your promotion! Looks like you’ll be getting a lot more (paycheck) attention now.”
“Sending you loads of love this Valentine’s Day (and maybe some fancy chocolates, too).”
“Just wanted to say I miss you (and your stellar cooking skills).”
“Happy anniversary! Let’s keep the flame alive (and maybe light some candles while we’re at it).”
“Wishing you a speedy recovery (and unlimited sick days).”
“It’s your birthday, so let’s party like there’s no tomorrow (or work, for that matter).”
“Congratulations on your new addition! Looks like you’ll be getting a lot more (diaper duty) attention now.”
“Sending you hugs and kisses (and maybe some hand sanitizer, too).”
“Happy retirement! Time to relax and enjoy life (and maybe take naps whenever you please).”
“Just wanted to drop you a line and say hello (and maybe confess my undying love for you).”
“Congrats on the new job! Looks like you’ll be climbing the ladder (and racking up those vacation days) in no time.”
“Happy New Year! Here’s hoping it’s filled with endless possibilities (and bottomless mimosas).”
“Just wanted to let you know I’m thinking of you (and hoping you remembered to turn off the stove before leaving the house).”

The never-ending hilarity of Recursive Puns about Greeting Cards

“Want to hear a pun about greeting cards? Just give me a second to flip through the deck.”
“Why was the greeting card feeling lonely? Because it didn’t have an envelope to seal with.”
“What did the greeting card say to the envelope? “You’re my main squeeze!” 🍋”
“How did the greeting card make a friend? It found someone who was just as cheesy.” 🧀
“Why did the greeting card go to the doctor? Because it was feeling envelope-y sick.” 🏥
“What do you call a greeting card that loves to dance? An e-card shuffle!” 💃
“Did you hear about the greeting card that got lost in the mail? It was envelope-d in a mystery.” 📬
“Why was the greeting card always so serious? Because it always had a straight-face envelope.” 😐
“Why did the greeting card get mad at the envelope? Because it got an inklin’ it was being sealed out.” 🖋️
“What happens when a greeting card meets a bad pun? It gets card-ed away!” 🃏
“Why did the greeting card go on a diet? Because it didn’t want to be an extra-folded card.” 🍽️
“What did the greeting cards wear to the party? Matching envelopes! They were quite coordinated.” 👯
“Did you hear about the two greeting cards that got married? They sealed their love with a kiss.” 💍💌

Shake hands with these clever “Greeting Card” Tom Swifties!

“I’m giving you this card for your birthday,” Tom said heartily. 🎂
“I’m so excited to see you!” exclaimed Tom joyfully. 😄
“I’m sorry I forgot your anniversary,” Tom apologized belatedly. 🙄
“This card is for you,” Tom said ungraciously. 🙄
“I love you more than words can express,” Tom declared lovingly. ❤️
“I hope you’re having a great day,” Tom hinted slyly. 😉
“This card is a small token of my appreciation,” Tom hinted at the small envelope enclosed. 💰
“I’m sending you this card from afar,” Tom said distantly. 🌎
“I hope you have a magical birthday,” Tom said abracadabra! 🎩
“I hope our friendship never fades,” Tom said colorfully. 🌈
“I hope your birthday is nothing short of extraordinary,” Tom said with fireworks in his eyes. 🎆
“I picked out this card especially for you,” Tom said with a wink. 😉
“I’m bummed I won’t be there for your special day,” Tom said feeling low. 🙁
“You light up my life like a candle on a cake,” Tom said glowingly. 🕯️
“I couldn’t resist getting this card for you,” Tom said with a cheesy grin. 😜

Knock, knock. Who’s there? A witty greeting card!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Greeting Card. Greeting Card who? Greeting Card-inal! 🎄
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Greeting Card. Greeting Card who? Greeting Cardio! I’m always sending heartfelt messages 💪
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Greeting Card. Greeting Card who? Greeting Cardi B! Just here to spread some hip hop cheer 🎤
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Greeting Card. Greeting Card who? Greeting Card-iologist! I’ve got plenty of hearts to write on ❤️
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Greeting Card. Greeting Card who? Greeting Car-dashian! My messages are so on fleek 💅
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Greeting Card. Greeting Card who? Greeting Cardigan! I’m always cozy and thoughtful 🧥
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Greeting Card. Greeting Card who? Greeting Carnivore! I’m always hungry for a good laugh 🍔
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Greeting Card. Greeting Card who? Greeting Uncle Greeting! Always here to make you smile 😊
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Greeting Card. Greeting Card who? Greeting Card-iology! I know just the right words to touch your heart ❤️
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Greeting Card. Greeting Card who? Greeting Cardiothoracic Surgeon! I’m always ready to mend a broken heart 💔
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Greeting Card. Greeting Card who? Greeting Car-deology! I study the science of humor 😜
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Greeting Card. Greeting Card who? Greeting Cardio Queen! I rule the card game 👑
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Greeting Card. Greeting Card who? Greeting Card-iac Arrest Prevention! I’m all about spreading joy and laughter to keep your heart healthy ❤️

Signed, Sealed, Pun-delivered: Greeting Card Humor

Well, it looks like we’ve reached the end of our pun-tastic journey through the world of greeting cards. 🎉 We hope you found some great jokes to tickle your funny bone and give your friends a good laugh. But don’t let the puns stop here – be sure to check out our other posts for more witty wordplay and hilarious jokes. 🤣 Thank you for reading, and remember, a pun a day keeps the grumpiness away! 😉✨