Hot Out Here: 135+ Witty Jokes & Puns About Scorching Weather!

🌞 Beat the heat with these hot weather puns that are sure to make you crack a smile 😂 From sunny side up jokes to clever quips about sweating, this list will have you laughing all summer long ☀️ So go ahead and chill out with these hilarious hot weather jokes for kids of all ages 🤣 Don’t let the temperature get you down when you can bask in the humor and positive vibes of these puns about hot weather 🔥

Beat the Heat with These Top “Hot Weather” Jokes – Editor’s Picks

“It’s a real scorcher today, but at least the ice cream truck is still melting hearts.”
“I’m so hot, I could fry an egg on the sidewalk. Too bad I can’t even make toast without breaking a sweat.”
“This heat is unbearable, it’s like walking through a sauna in a winter coat and snow boots.”
“I don’t need a gym membership, I just do my cardio by sprinting to the nearest air-conditioned building.”
“You know it’s summer when the only thing getting iced in your drink is your face.”
“It’s so hot, I saw a squirrel pickpocketing a popsicle from a kid’s hand.”
“I’m not saying it’s hot outside, but my popsicles melted while I was trying to unwrap them.”
“The weather is so hot, I saw a fire hydrant chasing a dog.”
“I’m sweating so much, I feel like I could have my own personal monsoon.”
“My AC isn’t broken, it’s just trying to tell me to cuddle up with the freezer.”
“Honestly, I wouldn’t be surprised if I start melting like a popsicle any minute now.”
“Why did the sun go to school? To get brighter.”
“I’m ready for fall so I can finally cool down with some pumpkin spice lattes and cozy sweaters.”
“I don’t always love hot weather, but when I do, it’s because I’m lounging by the pool with a margarita in hand.”

funny Hot Weather jokes with one liner clever Hot Weather puns at PunnyFunny.com

Summer Silliness: Hilarious Hot Weather One-Liners

“I’m melting like a popsicle in this heat, but at least I’m not a snowman.”
“I’m sweating like a pig at a bacon convention.”
“It’s so hot, I saw a squirrel pick up an ice cream cone.”
“Is it just me or is the weather hotter than a jalapeño’s revenge?”
“The weather forecast called for a heat wave, but this feels more like a heat tsunami.”
“It’s so hot, my sunscreen needs SPF who-knows-what.”
“I’m not saying it’s hot, but I just saw a chicken lay a hard-boiled egg.”
“They say it’s hot enough to fry eggs on the sidewalk, but who has the time to stand there and watch them?”
“The sun may be shining, but my face is more of a melted crayon situation.”
“It’s so hot, even the ice cubes are sweating.”
“I’m pretty sure I just saw a squirrel give up its nut because it was too hot to crack.”
“If I see one more person post a picture of their summer beach vacation, I might spontaneously combust.”
“I don’t always sweat, but when I do, it’s in this inferno-like heat.”
“Even the hot sauce is asking for a glass of water.”
“I’m sorry, but I can’t come to work today. My face is stuck in a permanent ‘sweat mustache’ position.”

Sizzling QnA: Jokes & Puns about Hot Weather

Q: What do you call a sunbathing dinosaur? A: A hot-diggy-saurus.
Q: Why did the heat wave break up with the cold front? A: It just wasn’t working out – they were always arguing over temperature.
Q: How do chickens stay cool during the summer? A: They use egg-fans, of course.
Q: What do you call a snowman in the desert? A: A puddle.
Q: What did the thermometer say to the sun? A: “You’re really hot, but I’m just trying to keep my cool.”
Q: Why did the ice cream get a sunburn? A: Because it forgot to put on its cone-ditioner.
Q: How does a meteorologist flirt? A: They use weather pick-up lines, like “Are you a heat wave? Because you’re making me sweat.”
Q: Why do heat waves love to go to the beach? A: To catch some rays.
Q: What’s the best summer accessory for a mathematician? A: A sunscreen with a high SPF-ration.
Q: How do you know it’s too hot to go outside? A: When you step out and immediately start sweating like a pig-thermometer.
Q: Why did the weatherman bring a stack of books to the beach? A: He wanted to get some summer reading done.
Q: What did the hail say to the sun? A: “Stop stealing my spotlight!”
Q: Why did the polar bear go to the desert? A: To go from cool to melanomabear.
Q: How does the sun like its eggs? A: Sunny side up.
Q: Why are popsicles such fans of summer? A: Because it’s their “stickiest” season!

Dad Jokes about Hot Weather: Sun-sational Humor!

What do you call a hot summer day? A “heatastrophe”!
I thought about going for a run in this hot weather, but I decided to just “melt” on the couch instead.
Why does hot weather always make me want to take a “sweatcation”?
I’m not saying it’s hot outside, but I just saw a chicken lay a fried egg in the street.
My wife complained about the heat making her hair frizzy, but I told her it just adds some “extra sizzle” to her look.
It’s so hot outside, I saw a fire hydrant chasing a dog.
I would go out for a walk, but the sun keeps staring at me like it wants to “suntan” on my back.
Why did the tomato turn red in the hot weather? Because it saw the salad dressing!
Hot weather shouldn’t bother us, we were “grilled” to withstand it.
I would offer you some water, but it’s too hot outside and I don’t want to contribute to the “global warming”.
I’m not sweating, I’m just “glistening” in this heat.
If you can’t handle the heat, get out of the “kitchen” and into the pool!
I heard someone complaining about the heat and I said, “Hey, can you handle the ‘heat-ache’?”.

Stay cool with these hilarious Hot Weather quotes

“Hot weather: when the sun is so jealous of your awesomeness, it decides to show off and make you sweat.” 😎🌞
“It’s so hot, even my sunscreen is melted!” 🌡️🔥
“Summer: when the air outside feels like a hot slap in the face.” 😂
“Is it just me or does anyone else feel like a melting popsicle in this heat?” 🍦🔥
“The only thing hotter than this weather is my impatience for autumn.” 🍂🍁
“I’m not saying it’s hot outside, but I just saw a squirrel rubbing sunscreen on his nuts.” 😂🐿️🌞
“If sweat was currency, I’d be a millionaire by now.” 💸💦
“I miss winter…said no one ever during a heatwave.” ❄️🔥
“My thighs are sticking together like a homemade PB&J sandwich in this heat.” 🍞🥜🔥
“In this heat, I really regret not being a mermaid.” 🧜‍♀️☀️
“I’m not sweating, I’m just sparkling in the sunlight.” ✨🌞
“It’s so hot, I’m jealous of ice cubes for their ability to not melt.” ❄️🔥
“The only good thing about hot weather is that my pool water is the perfect temperature for my wine.” 🍷💦
“I can’t tell if I’m sweating because it’s hot or because I’m so dang funny.” 🤔💦
“I’m convinced the sun is out to get me for all those years I avoided sunscreen.” ☀️👀

Chill Out with These Hilarious Heat Proverbs!

“When life gives you heatwaves, make lemonade popsicles.”
“A hot day without ice cream is just a volcano waiting to erupt.”
“The only thing hotter than the weather is my sunburn.”
“A wise man never wears a tie in the summertime.”
“A day at the beach is worth a month in air conditioning.”
“The only thing hotter than the sun is my salsa.”
“Sunscreen: the only thing standing between me and a lobster impersonation.”
“If you can’t take the heat, stay inside and watch Netflix.”
“A good friend is like an air conditioner on a hot day – just what you need.”
“This heat makes me want to hibernate until winter.”
“Hot weather is just nature’s way of telling us to take a siesta.”
“My summer body is just my regular body covered in sweat and bug spray.”
“I’ve never been more thankful for air conditioning than on a hot day.”
“Summer heat: the perfect excuse to wear shorts and a tank top to work.”
“Behind every great tan is a sunburn waiting to happen.”

Heat Things Up with These Hot Weather Double Entendres Puns

“When it’s hot outside, I like to keep things steamy” 🌡️🔥
“Looks like my AC isn’t the only thing blowing hot air” ❄️💨
“Summer forecast: Sunny with a chance of sweat” ☀️💦
“I always bring my hot bod to the beach, even in hot weather” 👙🌴
“Feeling like a melted popsicle in this heat” 🍦🌡️
“Dressing for hot weather is a balancing act between staying cool and not getting arrested” 🏊‍♀️🚫
“Hot weather is the perfect excuse to wear less and chill more” 🔞❄️
“I don’t always melt in hot weather, but when I do, it’s from a-very-licious” 🌡️😋
“Summer tip: Keep your head cool by thinking about ice cream” 🍦❄️
“My body is 90% water, and 10% AC-dependent” 💦❄️
“Hot weather is nature’s way of telling me to stay indoors and watch Netflix” 🌡️📺
“Spent all morning applying sunscreen, anyone want to help with my back?” ☀️😉
“I’ve been told I’m a hot mess, but in hot weather, I can also be seen as a melting mess” 😅🌡️
“I’m sweating like a sinner in church on a hot day” 🔥😅
“I like my weather like I like my coffee: scorching hot and impossible to handle without complaining” ☕🌡️

Sun-drenched Humor: Recursive Puns about Hot Weather

Why are heat waves the coolest? Because they always go back to their sources! 🌞❄️
I hate it when the temperature keeps rising. It’s such a recurring nightmare! 🔥😖
Global warming is like a broken record, it just keeps repeating and getting hotter. 🌍💿
The sun is like a boomerang, it just keeps throwing heat back at us. 🌞🔄
My AC is like a time machine, it just keeps taking me back to the sweltering summer days. ❄️⏰
The heat is like a mirror, it reflects back on us with double the intensity. 🔥🔥
Sweating in the sun is like an infinite loop, no matter how much you wipe it away, it just keeps coming back. 💦∞
Hot weather is like a bad penny, it just keeps turning up no matter how much you try to get rid of it. 💰🔥
I feel like I’m stuck in Groundhog Day, but instead of reliving one day, it’s just the same hot weather over and over again. 🏞️🌡️
The heat is like a clingy friend, it just won’t leave me alone no matter how much I try to get some space. 👯‍♂️🔥
Summer is like a broken record, it just keeps repeating itself with the same old humid days. 🌧️🔂
This heat wave is like a never-ending story, it just keeps going on and on without any plot twists. 📖🔥
The sun is like a stuck key on a keyboard, it just keeps typing out hot weather over and over again. ⌨️🌞
Is it just me or does hot weather feel like a broken escalator? It keeps going up and up with no way to escape. 🆙🔥

Feeling the Heat in “Hot Weather” Tom Swifties

“It’s so hot,” Tom said with a sigh, “I’m melting in this weather.” 😓
“This heat wave is unbearable,” Tom exclaimed low-key. 😩
“I can barely stand it,” Tom grumbled hotly. 🔥
“I’m sweating like a pig,” Tom declared with a sizzle. 🐷
“It’s hotter than a jalapeno pepper,” Tom remarked with a scorch. 🌶️
“I’m feeling parched,” Tom mumbled with a dry wit. 🍹
“Can we please turn on the AC?” Tom begged with a chill. ❄️
“I’m melting faster than an ice cream cone,” Tom whimpered with a drip. 🍦
“I’m getting fried by the sun,” Tom groaned with a sizzle. ☀️
“I’m perspiring profusely,” Tom stated with a moisture. 💦
“I’m so hot, I could ignite,” Tom laughed with a blaze. 🔥
“This weather is burning me up,” Tom grumbled with a char. 🔥
“I need some sunscreen, stat,” Tom exclaimed with a toast. 🌞
“I can’t take this heat any longer,” Tom cried with a meltdown. 😭

Knock, knock. Who’s there? A heat wave – hot joke coming!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Heat. Heat who? Heat wave’s coming, better turn on the AC!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Sunny. Sunny who? Sunny disposition won’t last long in this heat!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Summer. Summer who? Summer days, melting away in this scorching heat.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Hail. Hail who? Hail no, I can’t go outside in this hot weather!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Melted. Melted who? Melted ice cream, thanks to this heat.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Blaze. Blaze who? Blaze of glory, trying to survive this hot weather.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Burnt. Burnt who? Burnt to a crisp under the blazing sun.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Humid. Humid who? Humid and you don’t even know it in this hot weather!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Steamy. Steamy who? Steamy temperatures got me sweating buckets!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Sizzle. Sizzle who? Sizzle away, hot weather!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Heatstroke. Heatstroke who? Heatstroke – please call 911!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Drought. Drought who? Drought conditions, don’t forget to hydrate!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Roasting. Roasting who? Roasting in this hot weather, someone send help.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Blazing. Blazing who? Blazing temperatures, my hair is now a frizz ball. 🔥

Suns out, puns out: Hot weather humor!

🌞Phew, those puns were hotter than the sun! I hope you found them funny and cool enough to beat the heat. But don’t sweat it, there’s plenty more where that came from! Head over to our other pun and joke posts to keep the laughter going. And remember, when life gives you hot weather, make hot weather jokes! 🔥🙌😂