125+ Knight Jokes & Puns: Prepare to Laugh Your Armor Off!

Get ready to laugh your armor off! This isn’t your average list of puns – it’s a veritable treasure trove of the best knight jokes and puns that are sure to bring a smile to your face. If you’re looking for some clever wordplay and positive humor, you’ve come to the right place. Prepare yourself for a knight of fun as we dive into this hilarious collection!

Top Knight Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks: For a Noble Laugh

Why don’t knights ever give up? They’re always knight-minded!
What’s a knight’s favorite fish? A swordfish!
Heard about the knight who couldn’t sleep? He had knightmares!
Knights always win in arguments. They use their trusty debate-steeds!
That armor looks too small. Is that a mini-knight gown?
Did you hear about the knight who lost his voice? He’s a little hoarse!
The knight’s favorite magazine? Armor & Garden!
Be careful, that’s a dark knight alley!
Never argue with a knight. They always have the sharpest wit!
A knight who’s always late? Fashionably knight!
Always loved medieval history. It was my knight-mare!
That armor costs an arm and a leg… and a torso!
This castle is knight up my alley!
Sleeping in shining armor? Must be uncomfortable knightwear!
The knight’s online dating profile name? Sir-iously Single!
You’re looking sharp! I knight say!

Funny Knight Jokes With One Liner Clever Knight Puns at PunnyFunny.com

Funny Knight One-Liner Jokes: Guaranteed To Make You Laugh

I used to be a knight, but then I lost my day job.
Did you hear about the knight who fought a dragon with a chessboard? It was a stalemate.
Being a knight is tough work, but someone has to stay up all knight.
Never argue with a knight wearing chainmail; they’re always right.
That knight is so clumsy, he trips over the internet.
I told the knight he was losing his hair, he said “Alopecia knight.”
To become a knight, you need to pass a rigorous knight exam.
The knight’s favorite magazine? “Horse & Hound”, of course!
Being a medieval knight was rough, they didn’t even have playlists for their jousts.
What’s the difference between a knight and a chess piece? One gets paid to move, the other doesn’t.
The knight’s favorite movie? “The Lord of the Rings”, no knight about it!
I told my friend he was too invested in becoming a knight, he said “But it’s my destiny, knight now!”
The knight refused to use GPS, he preferred to follow his trusty squire directions.
Being a knight is all fun and games until someone loses an arm… and a leg.
What’s a knight’s favorite dance move? The joust!
You knight try being a little more medieval on your next date.

QnA Jokes & Puns about Knight: Armored with Laughter

Q: Why did the knight bring a ladder to the tournament? A: He heard the stakes were high!
Q: What did the knight say after winning a duel against a mime? A: Nothing, he let his victory speak for itself.
Q: Why did the knight refuse to fight in the daytime? A: He was a knight owl, not an early bird!
Q: What do you call a knight who can’t tell the time? A: An after-knight.
Q: What’s the difference between a clumsy knight and a bad dancer? A: One has two left feet, the other has two left greaves!
Q: What do you get if you cross a knight with a musician? A: Sir Paul McCartney!
Q: Why was the knight always losing his battles? A: His heart was in the right place, but his head was always off in the medieval times.
Q: Why did the knight fail his English exam? A: He used his sword instead of a pen, claiming it was mightier.
Q: What do you call a knight who’s really bad at jousting? A: Sir Loin the Loser!
Q: How did the knight get lost in the forest? A: He took the path of knight resistance!
Q: Where did the knight learn to fight dragons? A: Knight school!
Q: What did the knight say before heading off on a dangerous quest? A: “Well, I knight as well be going!”
Q: Why was the knight’s armor always sparkling? A: He used a shield polish with a knight-and-day guarantee!
Q: What does a knight use to check if his breath smells bad? A: A knight-scope!
Q: Did you hear about the knight who was always losing his keys? A: He had to change the locks every knight!

Dad Jokes about Knight: Prepare for puns of valor!

Why did the knight run away from the battle? He got cold feet… literally, his armor was too big!
You know, I used to be a knight, but then I got fired. Apparently, rescuing princesses at 2 am wasn’t in my “knight job description.”
What’s the difference between a knight and a chess piece? One gets moved around a board, the other removes boards from tables before dinner!
I told my son about the medieval period. He said, “Wasn’t it a knight to remember?” I told him, “No, it was the Middle Ages.”
This morning I asked my wife what she wanted for breakfast. Turns out, she wanted to be treated like a princess. So, I put her on a very high shelf and now she’s waiting for a knight to rescue her.
You know, knights had it rough. Back then, shining armor wasn’t just a figure of speech… it was a full-time job!
Why did the knight bring a ladder to the pub? So he could reach the knightcap!
Went to a medieval-themed restaurant the other day. The food? It was sub-par… get it? Like a knight’s weapon!
My wife asked me to name three famous knights. I said, “Sir Lancelot, Sir Galahad, and uh… Sir Vivor, the strongest of them all!”
Why don’t knights ever lose their battles? Because they’re always well-armed!
A knight walks into a tavern and orders a drink. As he sits down, he hears a high-pitched voice, “Hey, those pants look really great on you!” The knight looks around but sees nothing. He then returns to his drink thinking nothing more of it. But then, a moment later, he hears the same voice again, “I really like what you’ve done with your hair!” He asks the bartender, “Who keeps saying that?” The bartender replies, “Those are the peanuts… they’re complimentary.”
To be honest, I’d make a terrible knight. My armor is always rusty, my sword is always blunt, and every time I mount my horse, I come down with a knightmare.
I tried to join a knight school, but I failed the entrance exam. Turns out, knowing the entire alphabet except for “igh” is kind of important.
What do you call a knight who can’t tell the time? A knight-mare on any clock!
Always be nice to knights in shining armor. You never know when you might need them to come to your rescue… or fix your plumbing. Those suits are surprisingly versatile!
Hey, did you hear about the knight who was allergic to horses? His sneeze was all anyone could talk about! You could say it was… legendary!

Funny Quotes and Captions about Knight for a Medieval Laugh

“Just a knight out with my sword, looking for some adventure…or at least a 24-hour donut shop.”
“Being a knight is tough, especially when your armor doubles as a disco ball.”
“Sleep? What’s sleep? This knight’s got quests to complete…and laundry.”
“Always trust a knight in shining armor…unless he’s asking for your credit card information.”
“Dating apps are tough for knights. It’s all ‘swipe left’ and no damsels in distress.”
“Sure, knights save princesses. But who saves the knights from dragon breath?”
“You know you’ve chosen the wrong career path when your boss says, ‘Go slay a dragon,’ and you work at a zoo.”
“Life hack: Need to reach something high? Just yell ‘For the king!’ and throw a peasant.”
“My castle, my rules. Rule number one: No jousting before coffee.”
“Sure, I wear shining armor. It’s called aluminum foil, and it keeps my leftovers fresh.”
“They say chivalry is dead. Probably fell off his horse.”
“It’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye…then it’s just a regular Tuesday for a knight.”
“Roses are red, violets are blue. I’m here to rescue you…unless that dragon has snacks.”
“What’s a knight’s favorite fish? Swordfish, duh.”
“Don’t tell anyone, but my “steed” is actually just a really tall donkey with self-esteem issues.”
“Being a knight is basically just saying “Hark” and “Huzzah” all day. And occasionally hitting something with a sword.”

Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Knight: With a Dash of Chivalry and Chuckles

A knight in shining armor is worth two in the bush. (Unless you’re allergic to pollen, then maybe stay inside)
Early to bed and early to rise makes a knight healthy, wealthy, and less likely to be caught by surprise. (Except for dragon attacks, those are unpredictable)
Don’t judge a knight by his armor, but by the size of his…heart. (Of course, impressive weaponry is a bonus)
A knight’s word is their bond, unless they’re playing charades. (Then all bets are off)
The pen is mightier than the sword, especially when the knight forgets to pay his scribe. (Ink-stained fingers hold grudges, too)
All’s fair in love and war, and jousting tournaments…and board game nights. (Knights are surprisingly competitive)
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but a dragon away keeps the entire kingdom safe. (So maybe train your knight for dragon-slaying instead?)
Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither was a knight’s suit of armor. (Though overnight shipping has gotten pretty fast these days)
Too many cooks spoil the broth, and too many knights spoil the quest. (Someone always ends up arguing about who gets the dragon’s hoard)
The early bird gets the worm, but the knight in shining armor gets the princess. (Except on Tuesdays, she has fencing practice.)
Never look a gift horse in the mouth, especially if it’s wearing full plate armor. You might offend the knight.
A watched pot never boils, but a knight left alone in the armory will definitely try on all the helmets.
The customer is always right, even if they’re telling the blacksmith how to make a suit of armor. (Blacksmiths have hammers, remember?)
When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. When life gives you a dragon, call a knight…or learn to make dragon fruit smoothies.

Knight Double Entendres Puns: Jokes for Brave Hearts

“This armor is knight-mare to put on!” (Nightmare) – Complaining about cumbersome armor.
“He’s such a hit with the ladies, he could knight a whole convent!” (Night/Make love to) – Commenting on someone’s charm.
“She told the knight she was feeling brave, then spent the whole knight in shining armor.” (Night/Hiding in fear) – Playing on a cowardly persona.
“I asked the blacksmith for light armor, but all he had was knight-light.” (Nightlight) – Poking fun at limited options.
“He wasn’t knighted by the king, he was knighted by his love for her.” (Night/Consumed by passion) – Romantically attributing knighthood.
“You think you can beat me? You’re only a knight in tarnished cardboard!” (Night/Weak and unimpressive) – Downplaying an opponent’s abilities.
“Don’t worry, the Black Knight always loses… especially on poker knight.” (Night/Gambling event) – Combining medieval times with gambling.
“To win her heart, he’ll have to slay dragons, rescue princesses, and make it home by knight-fall.” (Nightfall) – Highlighting a curfew alongside heroic deeds.
“This quest is too dangerous for just one knight. We need at least a knight-mare!” (Nightmare/Large number) – Exaggerating the number of knights needed.
“Sir Lancelot was quite the knight owl, always up for a late-knight snack.” (Night owl/Late night) – Making fun of late-night eating habits.
“His chances with the Queen were slim to knight.” (None) – Describing hopeless romantic pursuits.
“The jousting tournament was a disaster. Let’s just say there were a lot of ‘knight-mares’ on the field.” (Nightmares/Fallen knights) – Making light of a failed competition.
“Sir Reginald may be losing his hair, but he’s still got his knight moves.” (Night Moves/Seduction skills) – Implying someone still has romantic prowess.
“She said she wasn’t impressed by his armor, but that he could knight-cap her anytime.” (Nightcap/A drink before bed) – Implying a suggestive offer.
“The dragon offered a tough battle. The knight thought to himself, ‘Well, this is going to be a long knight.’” (Night) – Commenting on the arduous task ahead.
“The rookie knight was always told, “Don’t knight the hand that feeds you, especially if it belongs to a dragon.” (Bite) – Humorous advice with a dangerous twist.

Funny Knight Tom Swifties: Jokes of Chivalry

“That suit of armor is quite hefty,” Tom said knightly.
“I think I’ll turn in for the night,” Tom said wearily.
“My armor needs a good polish,” Tom said brightly.
“I’m off on a quest for the Holy Grail!” Tom said holily.
“That dragon nearly turned me into toast!” Tom said dragonedly.
“My horse and I are quite the pair,” Tom said horsefully.
“That castle moat is deeper than I thought,” Tom said moatily.
“This jousting tournament is quite the challenge,” Tom said lancefully.
“I do enjoy a good feast after a long day,” Tom said knightfully.
“I think I’ll become a monk if this whole knight thing doesn’t work out,” Tom said habit-ually.
“That bard certainly knows how to spin a tale,” Tom said lyre-ically.
“My sword needs to be sharpened,” Tom said pointedly.
“My squire is quite clumsy,” Tom said squirelessly.
“I’m not sure I can win this battle,” Tom said defeatedly.
“I swear my allegiance to the king,” Tom said loyally.
“My code of chivalry is quite important to me,” Tom said honorably.
“Did you see the way I fought that dragon?” Tom boasted knightfully.

Knock-knock Jokes (Knock, knock. Who’s there?) about Knight for a Good Chuckle

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight just met you, and this is crazy, but here’s my sword, maybe slay a dragon, baby?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight owl, but I can party until dawn if you’d like!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight time you got a new suit of armor, that one’s looking a little rusty!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight have guessed you were home, your dragon is double-parked outside.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight make you laugh, but I’d probably have more luck with my lance.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight now the feeling, you forgot the snacks for movie night!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Sir. Sir who? Sir Knight to see you, may I come in?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight just the person to help you finish that jigsaw puzzle!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight say it was easy being a hero, but honestly, it’s pretty tiring.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight time someone invented a self-polishing suit of armor, am I right?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight tell you a secret, but I’d have to… well, you know the rest.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight need a vacation after rescuing that princess, let me tell you!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight think I’m lost, can you help me find my way to the nearest castle?
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight be an inconvenience, but do you have any spare horseshoes? Mine’s come loose.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Knight. Knight who? Knight say I told you so, but I warned you about the troll under the bridge!