105+ Lemon Jokes and Puns: You’re My Main Squeeze!

Pucker up, buttercup, because life’s about to get deliciously lemon-y! 🍋 Get ready for the best medicine (laughter, obviously) with this list of puns about everyone’s favorite sour citrus. We’ve got enough zesty humor here to make even the most bitter lemon lover say “lime-on!” Did you know ancient Romans used lemons as mothballs? Thankfully, we’ve found a much funnier use for them. Get ready to laugh your zest off with these clever and positive jokes – they’re anything but sour!

Top Lemon Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks: Zestiest Jokes Inside

1. Life gave me lemons. I made a meringue pie and threw it at life. (Short & sassy)
2. What did the lemon say to the lime at the beach party? “Tequila mockingbird!” (Unexpected punchline)
3. Fell in love with a lemon. Totally got juiced! (Short, sweet, plays on “juiced” meaning)
4. Just bought lemon-scented soap. It’s got a very appealing zest about it. (Classic wordplay)
5. Lemon love? Sour, yet sweet. (Short, relatable to the “romantic lemon” theme)
6. My friend’s a yoga instructor who opened a lemonade stand. He calls it “Twist & Shout.” (Combines both themes cleverly)
7. Relationship status: When life gives me lemons, I make lemonade… to forget. (Bittersweet humor)
8. Warning: Avoid making eye contact with lemons. They’re known to be sourpusses. (Silly personification)
9. Lemonade stand went bankrupt. Turns out, it was a very lime-ited market. (Phonetic wordplay)
10. Don’t be sad it’s over, be glad it was lemon-derful while it lasted. (Uplifting & punny)
11. You’re the lemon to my meringue. We’re tart-ally meant to be! (Cute, for “romantic lemon” theme)
12. What’s a lemon’s favorite kind of music? Anything but the blues! (Cheerful & unexpected)
13. My dog ate all my lemons. Now he’s looking a little… ruff. (Playful and relatable)
14. Just opened a lemon-themed gym. It’s called “Sour on the Outside, Fit on the Inside.” (Motivational with a pun)
15. Love is like a good lemonade – a perfect blend of sweet and sour. (Heartfelt ending note)

Funny Lemon One-Liner Jokes To Make You Smile

1. My love life is like a lemon – incredibly bitter and always getting juiced.
2. I tried to make lemonade out of my relationship with a lemon, but it turned out we had incompatible citrus perspectives.
3. She said she loved me for my zest for life, then she left me for a lime. Guess I was too acidic.
4. If life gives you lemons, ask for a margarita recipe. This tequila ain’t gonna mix itself.
5. I bought a car that turned out to be a lemon. Turns out, love at first sight doesn’t apply to automobiles.
6. My friend told me I was looking sour. I said, “Hey, at least I’m not yellow with envy!”
7. What did the lemon say to the lime when they bumped into each other? “Hey! Sorry, I’m having a zest-ful day!”
8. Why was the lemon so lonely? It had no one to share its zest for life with.
9. Dating a lemon is rough… every time you try to hold hands, you get pulp in your fingernails.
10. I tried writing a love song about a lemon, but it was too hard to find a rhyme for “citric acid.”
11. Don’t tell your problems to a lemon, they’ll just concentrate on your weaknesses.
12. The lemon quit his job at the juice factory. He said it was too “squeezing.”
13. I’m starting a band called “The Sour Grapes.” We’re like The Lemonheads, but with a worse outlook on life.
14. I tried to explain to the lemon that he wasn’t being replaced by the lime… he was just being “lime-lighted.”
15. What do you call a lemon that’s really funny? A comedic citrus!
16. Life is like a lemon: You can either squeeze it for all it’s worth or let it dry up and become a bitter disappointment. Your choice.

QnA Jokes & Puns about Lemon: Squeezing Out the Laughter

1. Q: Why did the lemon break up with the lime? A: They had too many sour patches.
2. Q: What did the lemon say to the lime at the party? A: “Hey there, are you feeling zesty tonight?”
3. Q: What do you call a romantic lemon? A: A sweet-tart!
4. Q: Why did the lemon blush? A: Because it saw the salad dressing!
5. Q: What’s a lemon’s favorite kind of music? A: Anything with a good citrus beat.
6. Q: What did the ocean say to the lemon? A: Nothing, it just waved!
7. Q: Why did the lemon get a job at the bank? A: Because it was good with its assets!
8. Q: How do you make a lemon meringue pie? A: First, you gotta whip it, whip it good!
9. Q: What did the lemon say when it was complimented? A: “Aw, you’re making me blush…a light shade of yellow!”
10. Q: What kind of car does a lemon drive? A: A yellow Kia-r!
11. Q: Why did the lemon cross the road? A: To prove to the lime it wasn’t chicken!
12. Q: What do you call a lemon with a bad attitude? A: A sourpuss!
13. Q: How can you tell if a lemon is in love? A: It gets all juicy!
14. Q: What’s a lemon’s favorite Shakespeare play? A: Much Ado About Nothing!
15. Q: Why are lemons such good problem solvers? A: Because they’ve got solutions for everything!
16. Q: Why was the lemonade stand so successful? A: It had a great marketing slogan: “When life gives you lemons, we make lemonade!”
17. Q: What did the lemon say to cheer up its friend? A: “Hey, don’t be blue, think of all the lemonade we can make!”

Dad Jokes about Lemon: Sourced from the best dads.

1. Why did the lemon break up with the lime? Because they couldn’t find any spark!
2. My wife asked me to name something yellow, sour, and romantic. I said, “A candlelit dinner with you, honey.”
3. I tried to make lemonade today. I used the whole lemon, even the seeds. It was seedy.
4. What did the lemon say to the bee? Bee gone!
5. Why are lemons bad at playing hide and seek? Because they’re easy to spot!
6. My son asked me to make him a lemon robot. I told him, “I can’t, it’s im-zester-possible!”
7. What’s a lemon’s favorite rock band? Smashing Pumpkins!
8. Why do people bring lemons to beaches? For the vitamin sea!
9. What do you call a group of lemons driving down the road? A traffic jam!
10. Why did the lemon cross the road? It saw a lime on the other side and thought, “Hey, that’s my main squeeze!”
11. What did the lemon say when it was asked to be in a movie? “Sure, I’ll give it my zest!”
12. I used to work at a lemonade stand… but it was too demanding. They kept saying, “Hey, where’s my glass?!”
13. My wife left a note on the fridge that said, “This isn’t working.” I’m not sure, but I think we need more lemons for the iced tea.
14. What’s a lemon’s least favorite chore? Peeling potatoes!
15. If you’re feeling stressed, just think of a lemon. Then visualize yourself throwing it at someone who annoys you. … It’s just a thought, don’t actually do it!
16. Me and my wife are like two peas in a lemon. We’re both tart and go well with tequila.

Funny Quotes and Captions about Lemon: Pucker Up!

1. Life gave me lemons. Turns out, I’m allergic. This explains so much.
2. My love life is like a lemon: incredibly bitter, and no one wants a second squeeze.
3. Just saw a sign that said “Freshly Squeezed Lemonade.” Pretty sure that’s lemon abuse.
4. Never ask a lemon for relationship advice. They’re a little…sour.
5. I tried to make lemonade from my bad decisions. Turns out I used limes. My life is a mojito of disappointment.
6. Started my day with hot water and lemon. It helped me come to terms with the fact that I’m basically drinking salad for breakfast.
7. I’m not saying I’m lazy, but I once considered hiring someone to make lemonade from the lemons life threw at me.
8. Found my soulmate. It was a lemon. Sadly, it was already in a committed relationship with a tequila shot.
9. My therapist told me to picture my problems as lemons. Now I’m just thirsty and more stressed than before.
10. I tried to be a romantic and give my date a single, perfect lemon. Apparently, “You’re the lemon to my life” doesn’t have the same ring to it.
11. My bank account is looking a little lemon-y these days – you know, yellow, and a bit shrivelled.
12. They say “love is sweet,” but mine’s looking a little lemon-drop right now.
13. I’m starting to think my horoscope should just say “Expect lemons” every day. It would save us both some time.
14. Sure, life is a bowl of cherries. But someone keeps putting all the lemons in mine. And then making me pay for the bowl.
15. My dating app bio now just says “Will trade life stories for lemonade.” So far, no takers.
16. Just bought a self-help book: “How to Turn Your Life Around, One Lemon at a Time.” I’m not sure if it’s working, but my house smells amazing.

Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Lemon: Squeezing the Laughter Out of Life

1. Life gives you lemons? Grab the tequila and salt. (Traditional: When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.)
2. Don’t be a sourpuss; be a sweet-tart success! (Traditional: Don’t cry over spilled milk.)
3. A lemon a day keeps the doctor… well, the doctor still has a job. (Traditional: An apple a day keeps the doctor away.)
4. The early bird gets the worm, but the patient lemon gets made into a delicious pie. (Traditional: The early bird gets the worm.)
5. You can’t judge a lemon by its peel, but you can judge it by its smell… especially if it’s cleaning supplies. (Traditional: Don’t judge a book by its cover.)
6. Two wrongs don’t make a right, but two lemons make a pretty good lemonade. (Traditional: Two wrongs don’t make a right.)
7. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, but the presence of a lemon meringue pie makes everyone happy. (Traditional: Absence makes the heart grow fonder.)
8. A penny saved is a penny earned, but a lemon saved is a pie postponed. (Traditional: A penny saved is a penny earned.)
9. Don’t put all your lemons in one basket, unless you’re making a really big batch of lemonade. (Traditional: Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.)
10. You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it squeeze a lemon into its eyes. It just wouldn’t be right. (Traditional: You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.)
11. A watched pot never boils, and a lonely lemon just gets juicier with anticipation. (Traditional: A watched pot never boils.)
12. If at first you don’t succeed, try adding sugar and water. You might just be dealing with a lemon. (Traditional: If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.)
13. Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither was this delicious lemon meringue pie. It took three hours, but who’s counting? (Traditional: Rome wasn’t built in a day.)
14. Good things come to those who wait, especially if they’re waiting for their lemon tree to bear fruit. (Traditional: Good things come to those who wait.)
15. Love is like a lemon, sometimes sweet, sometimes sour, but always good for a refreshing drink. (Traditional: Variety is the spice of life.)
16. When life closes a door, it probably opened a window to throw lemons at your head. Duck! (Traditional: When life closes a door, it opens a window.)

Lemon Double Entendres Puns: Sourced From the Fruit of Laughter

1. “I met my partner through a matchmaking service. They said they had the perfect lemon for me. Turns out, they were right.” (Implies a ‘sour’ partner)
2. “My date last night was like biting into a lemon… a real cutie pie!” (Plays on the tartness of a lemon and ‘sweet’ slang)
3. “I’m not sure what to make of my love life. It’s like a lemon… I keep hoping it’ll eventually make a good margarita.” (Implies a bittersweet situation)
4. “This relationship is getting too sour. I think it’s time to make lemonade.” (Turning a negative situation into something positive)
5. “I tried to write a love poem about you, but every time I pick up my pen, it feels like life handed me lemons…and a whole lot of paper to cry on!” (Playing on the idiom ‘life giving you lemons’)
6. “I think I’m in love. They’re like the perfect lemon meringue pie – sweet, tart, and absolutely irresistible.” (Compares love to the different flavour profiles of the pie)
7. “They say when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. But honestly, after this breakup, I just want to throw the whole pitcher at a wall.” (Humorous exaggeration of frustration)
8. “I told my friend my crush was a real lemon. Turns out, they overheard me… and brought me a whole basket of them on our next date.” (Misunderstanding of the double entendre)
9. “Our first kiss was like a lemon drop – small, sweet, and left me wanting more.” ( Comparing a kiss to a lemon-flavored candy)
10. “I knew they were the one for me. We just clicked, like two halves of a… lemon squeezer?” (Absurd and unexpected comparison for humor)
11. “Romance is like a lemon: sometimes it’s sweet, sometimes it’s sour, and sometimes you just get zested.” (Playing on the different ways a lemon is used).
12. “They said they wanted to add a little zest to my life. They weren’t kidding… they brought a whole lemon grove.” (Exaggerating the impact someone had)
13. “I tried speed dating. It was like a lemon tasting – mostly sour, with a few surprisingly sweet moments.” (Comparing speed dating to sampling different lemons)
14. “Our love story is a real page-turner…mostly because I keep using the lemon slices to mark my place.” (Implying a boring love story)
15. “I’m reading a romance novel called ‘The Lemon Orchard.’ It’s full of twists, turns, and a whole lot of pulp fiction.” (Wordplay using “pulp” in relation to both books and fruit)
16. “Love is like a lemon, you’ve got to be careful not to squeeze it too hard, or you’ll end up with a bitter aftertaste.” (Metaphor for handling relationships delicately)
17. “I’m looking for a love that’s like a good lemonade on a hot day – refreshing, revitalizing, and with just the right amount of pucker.” (Comparing desired love to the feeling of drinking lemonade)

Funny Lemon Tom Swifties: With a Sour Twist

1. “This lemonade needs more sugar,” Tom said tartly.
2. “I just bought a whole crate of lemons,” Tom said fruitfully.
3. “My car only runs on citrus,” Tom said lemonly.
4. “Is this lemon imported from Italy?” Tom asked Rome-antically.
5. “I used all the lemons for this cake,” Tom declared zestily.
6. “This lemon meringue pie is to die for!” Tom exclaimed pithily.
7. “I can’t believe you dropped the lemon tart!” Tom said crustily.
8. “These lemon bars are a little sour,” Tom remarked acidly.
9. “I love the smell of lemons in the morning,” Tom said refreshingly.
10. “Oops, I think I added too much lemon juice,” Tom said sourly.
11. “Pass me another slice of that lemon cake,” Tom requested lovingly.
12. “This lemon curd is absolutely perfect,” Tom murmured smoothly.
13. “Did you just squeeze lemon juice in my eye?” Tom cried sharply.
14. “These lemon drops are awfully sticky,” Tom said tackily.
15. “Life gave me lemons, so I made life take them back! I don’t want your damn lemons!” Tom said rebelliously.
16. “I think I’m in love with a lemon,” Tom confessed juicily.

Knock-knock Jokes about Lemon (Knock, knock. Who’s there?) That’ll Squeeze a Laugh Out of You!

1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lemon. Lemon who? Lemon-ing for your love, and I brought lemonade! 🍋❤️
2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lemon. Lemon who? Lemon-drop everything and let’s have some fun! 🎉
3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lemon. Lemon who? Lemon-aid me in this, I can’t think of another punchline! 😜
4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lemon. Lemon who? Lemon-derful to see you! What brings you by? 😄
5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lemon. Lemon who? Lemon-ister, I presume? You’ve got a sour look on your face! 🍋🤨
6. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lemon. Lemon who? Lemon-t you forget, life is too short to be anything but happy! 😊
7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lemon. Lemon who? Lemon-d me your ears, I have a juicy secret to tell! 🤫
8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lemon. Lemon who? Lemon-ly you could make me laugh like that! 😂
9. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lemon. Lemon who? Lemon-ology doesn’t lie, this is a match made in citrus heaven! 🍋💖
10. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lemon. Lemon who? Lemon-t be shy, come on in and have a glass of lemonade! 🍋🍹
11. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lemon. Lemon who? Lemon-nection terminated. I was told this was a grapefruit enthusiast meeting! 🍇😂
12. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lemon. Lemon who? Lemon-me in! It’s cold out here and I brought lemon bars! 🍋🍪😋