125+ Lock Jokes & Puns: You’ll Be Key-ed Up!

Get ready to unlock a vault of laughter! This ain’t no pickpocket’s game; we’re talking about the BEST lock jokes and puns that’ll have you howling with glee. Did you know that the average person laughs 10 times a day? Well, get ready to surpass that with this list of clever and positively hilarious wordplay. From locksmiths to lockers, we’ve got the humor combo that’s sure to make you the KEYmaster of comedy. So, lock in your funny bone and let’s get this pun party started!

Top Lock Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks: You’ll Be Stoked For These

1. What did the lock say after a tough day? “Key, leave me alone!”
2. I lost my key last week. Still haven’t found a better lock-ation.
3. New to the neighborhood, met the locksmith today. Seems like a pretty key guy.
4. Why did the bike go to the psychiatrist? It was having cycle-logical locks.
5. Just got my hair styled like a padlock. It’s un-be-weave-able!
6. What’s a vampire’s favorite lock? A deadbolt.
7. Heard a rumor about a lock. Turns out it was picked.
8. Locks are surprisingly optimistic. They always see the keyhole, never the closed door.
9. Broke up with my girlfriend. She was seeing a locksmith. Turns out, she gave me the wrong key!
10. Never tell a secret in a cornfield. Too many ears to lock onto it.
11. What do you call a lock that loves to dance? A funk-y lock!
12. Lost the key to my locker. Had to call a locksmith. Talk about a sticky situation.
13. How does a celebrity secure their luggage? With a lock-and-key paparazzi system.
14. My new apartment only has one lock. It’s a bit risky, but I’m willing to take the key.
15. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, even locks!

Funny Lock One-Liner Jokes To Unlock Your Laughter

1. My friend started a locksmith business, but it failed… he couldn’t find a key demographic.
2. Did you hear about the locksmith who won an award? He was cited as the most key worker.
3. Why did the lock blush? Because it saw the keyhole.
4. What do you call a lock that loves to travel? A roam-bolt.
5. My locker in high school was so messy, even archaeologists wouldn’t touch it.
6. I used to be a locksmith, but every day felt the same…very repetitive.
7. A locksmith’s favorite movie is “The Lord of the Rings”… all that talk about “one key to rule them all.”
8. Dating a locksmith is great until you realize all their compliments are lock, stock, and barrel cheesy.
9. What’s the difference between a lock and a baby? One you can eventually reason with to open up.
10. Just bought a talking lock…thing’s always making cutting remarks.
11. Why did the detective stake out the locker room? He heard there was a combination in progress.
12. My childhood dream was to become a locksmith, but I couldn’t find the key to success.
13. Always trust a lock’s advice… it’s usually well-grounded.
14. Never ask a lock to keep a secret… they’re always telling.
15. A lock and a key walk into a bar. The bartender looks at them and says, “Hey, I’ve got a drink named after you!” The lock whispers, “Oh no, he’s got me pegged.”
16. What’s a lock’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good key change.

QnA Jokes & Puns about Lock: You Can’t Handle These Keys!

1. Q: Why did the locksmith win an award? A: He was great at picking things up!
2. Q: Why did the lock go to the doctor? A: It was feeling a little bolted down.
3. Q: Why don’t locks ever tell secrets? A: They’re always keeping things under wraps!
4. Q: What did the lock say to the key after a fight? A: “We need some space. Please, just go.”
5. Q: What do you call a lock that’s always getting into trouble? A: A key-lprit!
6. Q: How does a lock get ready for a date? A: It uses a key-chain to find its keys!
7. Q: What’s a lock’s favorite type of music? A: Anything with a good key!
8. Q: What do you call a sad lock? A: Down in the dumps-ter lock.
9. Q: Why do lockers get good grades? A: They’re always keeping things organized!
10. Q: Do you think this lock will keep my belongings safe? A: Trust me, it’s key-pable!
11. Q: What do you call it when a lock refuses to open? A: A key-tastropy!
12. Q: Where do locks go when they’re tired? A: They get a key-nap!
13. Q: What’s the most secure type of lock? A: A deadbolt. It’s really good at its job… for once.
14. Q: Why did the detective fall in love with the locksmith? A: She had the key to his heart!
15. Q: What did the lock say after yoga class? A: “That really keyed me up!”
16. Q: What’s a lock’s favorite drink? A: Oil, it’s key-to staying in working order!

Dad Jokes about Lock: Prepare to Be Unlocked with Laughter

1. Why don’t they have locks in yogurt containers? Because then it would be cultured!
2. Why did the lock go to the doctor? It was feeling a little bolted down.
3. What did the locksmith say to the door? “Don’t worry, I got this under lock-eye.”
4. My son asked me to help him with his locker combination… I told him, “Sure, I’ve got this on lock!”
5. Why was the lock always invited to parties? Because it knew how to keep things secure and was always the key to a good time!
6. Did you hear about the locksmith who lost his house, car, and family? Talk about a total key-tastrophe!
7. What do you call a lock that’s always getting into trouble? A real key-osk!
8. My wife got mad at me for spending $50 on a fancy, talking lock… But I told her, “Hey, communication is key!”
9. What does a lock eat for breakfast? Key-rios!
10. You know what they say… If you love something, set it free. Unless it’s a lock; then you need the key back.
11. My neighbor is a locksmith… His business really took off, he’s got key money now.
12. I went to a vintage lock convention… It was totally key-ool!
13. Why did the lock break up with the key? Because they didn’t see eye to eye-hole!
14. How do you take over a country run by locksmiths? With a key-oup!
15. What’s a lock’s favorite song? “Key-ser Soze” by Khalid!
16. Why did the lock get a promotion? Because it was always exceeding key performance indicators!

Funny Quotes and Captions about Lock to Lock Up Some Laughs

1. My love for you is like a rusty lock: hard to open, but worth the effort…and maybe a little WD-40. 😉
2. Just got my hair braided. It’s called the “deadlock.” No escape route, even for stray hairs.
3. You say “password fatigue,” I say “combination lock nostalgia.” One of us is living in the past. 👵
4. Don’t tell anyone, but I think my diary has stage fright. Every time I try to write, it gets lockjaw. 🤫
5. My diet plan is like trying to pick a lock with a spoon: I’m in way over my head.
6. Just saw a locksmith picking up a girl on Tinder. He really knew how to break the ice… and her security questions, apparently. 😎
7. My bank account is like a locker room: constantly changing, always crowded, and I rarely see my things in there.
8. They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but a lock of hair from your childhood crush? Priceless. (Don’t judge.) 🙈
9. Me trying to remember where I put my keys is like a medieval siege on a lock: lots of brute force, no real progress.
10. If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Unless you’re a locksmith—then you just charge double. 🤑
11. My therapist told me to unlock my inner child. Now I owe the bouncy house a lot of explanations.
12. My dating life is like a public locker: smelly, often empty, and someone keeps stealing my lunch. 😩
13. Just bought a self-help book called “Finding the Key to Your Heart.” Turns out, it’s just a locksmith’s brochure in disguise.
14. Parallel parking is a lot like trying to open a combination lock in the dark. Mostly frustration, sometimes you get lucky.
15. My heart is like a hotel—there’s always someone checking in and out, but the security deposit is a lock of hair. 💔
16. The only thing harder than changing your mind is changing a lock after you’ve glued the keyhole shut. Asking for a friend.
17. Relationship status: In a committed relationship… with my Netflix password. Ain’t nobody cracking this lock. 🔐

Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Lock: Unlocking the Laughter

1. A lock is only as strong as the desire to break it. And the availability of a really big hammer.
2. Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy, and less likely to forget where he put his keys.
3. Don’t cry over spilled milk, especially if there’s a lock on the refrigerator.
4. Fool and his money are soon parted. A wise man invests in a good lock.
5. A watched pot never boils, but a locked one keeps the teenagers from making ramen at 3 am.
6. You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him pick a lock… unless he’s Mr. Ed, that tricky stallion.
7. Where there’s a will, there’s a way, unless the will is locked in a safety deposit box you can’t find.
8. An apple a day keeps the doctor away. A lock on the fridge keeps everyone away.
9. The early bird catches the worm. The locksmith catches the early bird trying to break into the worm farm.
10. Measure twice, cut once. Or just call a locksmith, they’ve seen it all.
11. Rome wasn’t built in a day, but they probably had better locks than whatever you’re using.
12. One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. One locksmith’s trash is a treasure trove of lock picks and stories you wouldn’t believe.
13. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket, unless that basket is behind a very sturdy lock.
14. A penny saved is a penny earned. A locksmith’s bill is a reminder to invest in quality locks.
15. The grass is always greener on the other side… probably because they got a better deal on their fence locks.
16. Silence is golden, especially when you’re trying to pick a lock.

Lock Double Entendres Puns: Key-ed Up for Laughs

1. I tried to make a lock using only spaghetti… You could say it was an impasta!
2. This new hair gel claims to lock in your style for 24 hours… I guess we’ll see if it holds up.
3. Did you hear about the locksmith who won an award? He really got the key to success.
4. My friend said he could pick any lock in the world… Turns out, he couldn’t handle the pressure.
5. I went to a party for locksmiths last night… It was absolutely deadbolt!
6. Feeling down? Just remember… Even a bad day can only lock you in for 24 hours.
7. Writing a song about my undying love… Think I’ve finally found the key to her heart.
8. Why did the phone go to the gym? It wanted to get a lock screen.
9. Trying to teach a squirrel how to escape a cage… He just wasn’t picking up the lock-tion.
10. My kid is obsessed with locks… Guess you could say it’s his key interest.
11. That new spy movie was riveting… The plot had me completely lock-ed in.
12. Heard the combination to the safe was 1234… Seems a little lock-luster if you ask me.
13. Started a band called “The Lock Outs”… We’re having a little trouble getting any gigs.
14. My love for you is like a rusty lock… It may take a while, but I’ll find a way to open up to you.
15. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, even the locks!
16. Just finished writing a ballad about a padlock… It’s definitely my key change so far.
17. What do you call a lock that’s always happy? Key-otic!

Funny Lock Tom Swifties: Jokes That Really Click

1. “That lock is surprisingly hard to pick,” Tom said stiffly.
2. “I think I need a smaller lock pick,” Tom said narrowly.
3. “This combination lock is really complicated,” Tom mumbled.
4. “I’m finally starting to understand how this lock works!” Tom exclaimed keyly.
5. “I told you I could pick that lock!” Tom said triumphantly.
6. “I think I left my keys in the lock,” Tom said absentmindedly.
7. “Maybe we should call a locksmith,” Tom said defeatedly.
8. “That locksmith charged an arm and a leg!” Tom said disarmingly.
9. “I can’t believe I forgot the combination to my locker,” Tom said shamefacedly.
10. “My locker is full of old love letters,” Tom said secretively.
11. “I wish I had a bigger locker,” Tom said spaciously.
12. “Someone glued my locker shut!” Tom said adhesively.
13. “I think I just saw someone trying to break into my locker,” Tom said guardedly.
14. “At least they didn’t steal my lucky lock of hair,” Tom said folliclely.
15. “I’m thinking about getting a lock for my diary,” Tom said journalistically.
16. “These diary entries are pretty embarrassing,” Tom said lockily. (Get it? It’s ironically bad!)
17. “This whole ‘lock’ pun thing is my new obsession,” Tom said conclusively.

Knock-knock Jokes about Lock: You’ll Be Unlocked with Laughter

1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lock. Lock who? Lock-ing for some laughs? You’ve come to the right place!
2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Howard. Howard who? Howard you like to be locked out with no key?
3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lock. Lock who? Lock-ing for someone who appreciates a good pun, that’s you, right?
4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, it’s cold out here and my key is stuck in the lock!
5. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Alpaca. Alpaca who? Alpaca the suitcase, you load up the car! This lock isn’t going to hold forever!
6. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce in! I just went for a run and I accidentally locked myself out!
7. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Ken. Ken who? Ken I come in? It’s really locked out here.
8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Iowa. Iowa who? Iowa guy ten bucks he can get through that locked door!