Making a Splash with 230+ Mermaid Jokes and Puns: Get Your Finny Fix!
Are you ready to dive into a sea of laughter? Look no further, because here is our handcrafted list of the best mermaid jokes for kids! These clever puns about mermaids are sure to make a splash and leave you and your little ones giggling. Get ready for a fin-tastic time filled with humor and positive vibes. Grab your snorkels and let’s dive into this hilarious collection of mermaid jokes.
Making a Splash with These Fin-tastic Mermaid Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks
- Why did the mermaid change her name to Ariel? Because she wanted to be more famous than Madonna.
- What do you call a mermaid who swims the English Channel? A miracle.
- How does a mermaid make phone calls? With a shell phone, of course.
- What did the mermaid say when she met the love of her life? “I’m hooked.”
- Why did the mermaid go to the seafood restaurant? She wanted to see if they had any fish she recognized.
- What did the mermaid wear to her job interview? A shell suit.
- Why don’t mermaids like to share their secrets? Because they’re afraid they’ll tell too many tail fins.
- What’s a mermaid’s favorite song? “Under the Sea” of course!
- How do mermaids stay in shape? With a seaweed fitness program.
- What do you call a mermaid who is always confused? Mermuddled.
- What’s a mermaid’s favorite type of cookie? Sand dollars.
- Why did the mermaid decide to become a vegetarian? She didn’t want to be a part of the catch of the day.
- Where do mermaids go to see movies? At the dive-in theater.
- What’s a mermaid’s favorite workout move? The tide plank.
- What’s the mermaid’s favorite style of dance? The splash cha-cha.
- Why don’t mermaids tell jokes? They’re afraid they’ll crack themselves up.
- How does a mermaid communicate with dolphins? They use sea-speak.
- What did the mermaid say when she bumped into a rock? “Oh, my cod!”
- Why did the mermaid give up singing? Because she was always getting colds from all the water in her mic.
- How does a mermaid make a fashion statement? With a sea-sational outfit.

Making a Splash with These Hilarious ‘Funny Mermaid’ One-Liner Jokes!
- Why don’t mermaids ever get on a scale? Because they have their own scales!
- Did you hear about the mermaid with a lisp? She couldn’t say “sea” shells!
- What did the lazy mermaid say? “I’ll do it tide-y.”
- Why was the mermaid feeling sick? She ate some bad shrimp.
- How does a mermaid clean her fins? With tide pods.
- How do mermaids communicate underwater? They use shell phones.
- What do you call a mermaid on a bicycle? A “mer-cycle”!
- Why don’t mermaids tell secrets? Because they’re afraid they’ll spread through the ocean like a “sea-gossip”!
- What did the mermaid say when she saw her reflection? “Mirror, mirror, on the seafloor, who’s the fairest mermaid of them all?”
- How do mermaids keep their hair looking so good? With tide-y locks!
- What did the mermaid clam up about when she was interrogated? The fact that she stole a “seashell” phone!
- Why are mermaids so good at math? Because they know their “fins” from their losses.
- What do you call a mermaid who’s always on time? Punctual-lopod!
- Did you hear about the mermaid who started her own seaweed farm? She’s making a kelp-ing profit!
- What do mermaids like to drink? Coral-ade!
- How does a mermaid keep her hair from getting tangled? With conditioner-octipi!
- Why do sharks avoid mermaids? Because they’re afraid they’ll get “marlin”ed!
- What do mermaids use to hold up their hair? Sea-hair-vants!
- Why did the mermaid go to the doctor? She was feeling “crabby”!
- How does a mermaid make a sandcastle? With her sand-dollars!
Swimmingly Hilarious QnA Jokes & Puns about Mermaids to Make a Splash!
- Why did the mermaid go to the doctor? Because she had a bad case of the bubbles!
- What did the mermaid say when she saw the ship? “Oh, ship!”
- What do you call a mermaid who can do magic? A sea-n-saw.
- How did the mermaid wash her hair? With the tide and shampoo.
- Why did the mermaid swim in circles? To keep her braids from getting tangled.
- What’s a mermaid’s favorite subject in school? Fin-nish.
- Why was the mermaid feeling blue? She was feeling a little shellfish.
- What did the mermaid say when she saw her reflection? “I krill it every time!”
- Why can’t mermaids be lawyers? They can’t pass the bar!
- What do you call a group of singing mermaids? A choir of sirens.
- Why did the mermaid refuse to go to the bottom of the ocean? She was afraid of pressure.
- What’s a mermaid’s favorite type of math? Multi-ply-fishing.
- How does a mermaid keep track of her friends? She uses her conch-shell phone.
- Why did the mermaid refuse to eat clam chowder? She couldn’t stomach it.
- What’s a mermaid’s favorite type of music? Tidal karaoke.
- What do you get when you cross a mermaid with a snowman? A mer-snow-man.
- Why was the mermaid feeling nostalgic? She was reminiscing about her shell-fies.
- What did the mermaid say when she heard a dad joke? “Whale, that was awful.”
- Why did the mermaid get kicked out of her band? She couldn’t carry a tuna!
- How does a mermaid greet her fellow merpeople? With a shell-o!
Making a Splash with Dad Jokes about Mermaids
- Why did the mermaid keep swimming in circles? She was all turned around!
- How do mermaids clean their fins? With a tide pod!
- What did the mermaid name her pet octopus? Squishy!
- Did you hear about the mermaid who didn’t want to get married? She was too shellfish!
- What do you call a mermaid on a surfboard? A wave rider!
- Why was the mermaid afraid to swim in the deep end? She was scared of the deep sea-monster!
- How do mermaids measure their hair? In sea-weaves!
- Why are mermaids such good singers? They can hit all the high notes in the ocean!
- What do you call a mermaid who works at a sushi restaurant? A sushi-roll mermaid!
- How did the mermaid know she had lost weight? She could sea the difference in her scales!
- What’s a mermaid’s favorite type of math? Aquarithmetic!
- What did one mermaid say to the other when they bumped into each other? O-fish-ially clumsy!
- Why did the mermaid bring her phone underwater? She wanted to take shell-fies!
- What do you call a mermaid who makes clothes? A mer-maiden!
- Did you hear about the mermaid who joined a book club? She was hooked on reading!
- How do mermaids pay for things? With shell-ter dollars!
- What does a mermaid wear to math class? A seawhat!
- Why are mermaids such good detectives? They always catch the fishy suspects!
- How does a mermaid stay in shape? She eats seaweed and swims laps!
- Why did the mermaid go on a diet? She was afraid she would grow a salt-water tummy!
Swim away with laughter with these hilarious quotes about mermaids!
- “A mermaid’s hair always looks perfect, no matter how many waves she’s been through.”
- “The ocean’s resident drama queens: mermaids.”
- “Beauty may be skin deep, but scales go all the way to the tail for mermaids.”
- “It’s not easy being a mermaid – imagine trying to do your makeup underwater.”
- “I’m not saying mermaids are vain, but have you seen how many mirrors they have in their underwater castles?”
- “Even mermaids envy the grace and elegance of dolphins.”
- “I wonder if mermaids have their own version of ‘The Little Mermaid’ – ‘The Little Human’ perhaps?”
- “Mermaids: half fish, half fabulous.”
- “A mermaid’s diet consists of equal parts fish and glitter.”
- “If Ariel taught us anything, it’s that you should always brush your hair before going under the sea.”
- Forget diamonds – a mermaid’s best friend is a good waterproof mascara.
- “Why do mermaids sing? Probably because they can’t dance underwater.”
- “The only thing more magical than a mermaid is a mermaid with a great sense of humor.”
- “I don’t always believe in mythical creatures, but when I do, they’re majestic, half-human, half-fish beings.”
- “Mermaids don’t have bad hair days, they have ‘Calamari Chic’ days.”
- “Happiness is a warm lagoon and a group of mermaids to swim with.”
- “Mermaids don’t have to worry about tan lines, they have scales to protect their modesty.”
- “Mermaids have mastered the art of multitasking – swimming, singing, and looking fabulous all at once.”
- “Why do people say ‘fish out of water’ like it’s a bad thing? Have they never heard of a mermaid?”
- “Mermaids may have to give up their voices for love, but at least their fins stay fabulous.”
Swimmingly Funny: Proverbs & Sayings on the Mystical Mermaid
- A mermaid’s beauty may lure you in, but her fishy smell will push you away.
- A mermaid’s love is like a goldfish’s memory, fleeting and short-lived.
- A mermaid without a tail is like a bird without wings, useless and helpless.
- Don’t trust a mermaid with your secrets, she’ll sell them to the highest bidder.
- A mermaid’s voice is like a siren’s song, it will lead you to your demise.
- A mermaid’s tears are like pearls, precious but salty.
- A ship may sink, but a mermaid always floats.
- A mermaid’s idea of fine dining is a shipwreck buffet.
- Don’t fall for a mermaid’s tricks, they’ll leave you high and dry.
- A mermaid’s net worth is measured in sea shells and lost treasures.
- A mermaid’s beauty is only skin deep, or should I say scale deep?
- It’s not easy being a mermaid, have you tried swimming in a tail?
- A mermaid’s love knows no bounds, as long as you stay within the ocean.
- Don’t go searching for a mermaid’s heart, it belongs to the sea.
- A mermaid’s hair may be long and luscious, but it’s also full of seaweed.
- A mermaid’s kiss may grant you eternal life, but who wants to live underwater?
- Finding a mermaid with two legs is like finding a unicorn, it’s probably just a horse with a horn on its head.
- Mermaids may have beautiful voices, but their gossip is deadly.
- A mermaid’s tail is not just for swimming, it’s also a weapon.
- Don’t underestimate a mermaid’s strength, they can outswim and outsmart any human.
Making a Splash with Mer-maid Double Entendres and Puns
- “I’m hooked on you, my mermaid. But can I please have my heart back?”
- “I’m a real catch, but you’re the one who reeled me in, mermaid.”
- “Sorry I’m late, I was stuck in traffic. Triton-to-be exact, it was a school of mermaids.”
- “I always thought mermaids were supposed to lure sailors, not steal their hearts.”
- “My love for you is deeper than the ocean, mermaid.”
- “I thought I saw a mermaid, but it was just my ex-fish.”
- “You must be a mermaid, because I’m drowning in your beauty.”
- “I must be a dolphin because I can’t stop flipping’ for you, mermaid.”
- “I hope I’m not being too forward, but can we shell-ebrate this moment with a kiss, mermaid?”
- “You’re making waves in my heart, mermaid.”
- “I would love to take a dip with you, mermaid. But I must warn you, I’m a tadpole at heart.”
- “You may have fins, but you’re the one who flo-aunts my heart, mermaid.”
- “I guess you could say I’m a mer-magnet for your love.”
- “I may not have a mermaid tail, but I’m a sucker for your charms.”
- “I’ll show you my treasure if you show me your shell-phone number, mermaid.”
- “Are you a mermaid? Because every time I look at you, I’m all tide up.”
- “I’m usually not one to get carried away, but you have me hooked, mermaid.”
- “Do you want to sea the underwater world with me, mermaid? ‘Cause I’m a-mer-rounded by your beauty.”
- “You must have fins because I can’t resist your swimmertude.”
- “I guess you could say my love for you goes deaper than the Mariana Trench, mermaid.”
Shellebrating the Delightfully Recursive Puns about Mermaids
- Why did the mermaid cross the road? To get to the other tide.
- What do you call a mermaid who loves to knit? A mer-maiden.
- What do mermaids use to clean their fins? Tide pods.
- How does a mermaid greet her friends? With a wave.
- Why did the mermaid refuse to date the octopus? She was afraid of getting too tentacled.
- What do you get when you cross a vampire and a mermaid? A bloodthirsty mer-count.
- Why did the mermaid blush? The tide is high.
- What did the mermaid say when she stubbed her toe? Ouch, that hurt my coral-ies.
- How does a mermaid communicate with her friends far away? Through shell phones.
- Why did the mermaid become a vegetarian? She didn’t want to scale back on her health.
- What do you call a mermaid with a short temper? Siren-sational.
- Why was the mermaid afraid to go into shallow water? She didn’t want to carp-e diem.
- How do mermaids make their hair so shiny? They use sea-salt spray.
- What is a mermaid’s favorite ice cream? Seashell-a.
- Why did the mermaid’s computer keep malfunctioning? It kept getting too many eels.
- How do mermaids stay in shape? They swim-ercise.
- Why did the mermaid join a support group? She wanted to learn to cope with her emotional rollercoaster.
- What did the mermaid say when she won an award? Fin-ally!
- How does a mermaid apologize for making a mistake? She offers her sea-pologies.
- Why was the mermaid bad at math? She always got caught in a never-ending sea-quins of numbers.
Mermazing Tom Swifties for Mermaid Lovers Everywhere
- “I can’t believe I have to swim all the way back to shore,” Tom said mer-miserably.
- “Look, it’s a school of fish!” Tom shouted mer-excitedly.
- “I never thought I’d meet a talking seahorse,” Tom said mer-amazed.
- “I can’t find my seashell bikini anywhere,” Tom said mer-frustrated.
- “This underwater dance party is fin-tastic,” Tom said mer-enthusiastically.
- “I hope this seaweed wrap face mask doesn’t make me look like a seaweed monster,” Tom said mer-hesitantly.
- “I never get tired of swimming in circles,” Tom said mer-idly.
- “I wish I had a waterproof phone to take selfies with all these fish,” Tom said mer-wistfully.
- “Finding Nemo is just a fishy version of The Little Mermaid,” Tom said mer-comparingly.
- “I always knew shell phone technology would catch on,” Tom said mer-smugly.
- “I tried to give that dolphin a high-five, but it just kept swimming away,” Tom said mer-sadly.
- “The crabs keep stealing my jewelry, what a bunch of shellfish thieves,” Tom said mer-angrily.
- “I never skip fin day at the gym,” Tom said mer-assertively.
- “I caught my tail in a seaweed trap again, talk about mer-trouble,” Tom said mer-embarassed.
- “I’m going for a quick dip in the ocean, I’ll be back in a splash,” Tom said mer-hastily.
- “Those sharks are pretty sharp, I’d hate to be on their bad side,” Tom said mer-pensively.
- “I can hold my breath for three minutes, I guess you could say I’m mer-aculous,” Tom said mer-boastfully.
- “I’m not grumpy, I’m just mer-cranky before my morning seaweed coffee,” Tom said mer-tiredly.
- “I wanted to be a siren, but I ended up with a fish tail instead,” Tom said mer-disappointed.
- “I hate getting seaweed stuck in my teeth, it’s such a sea-zing hassle,” Tom said mer-grouchily.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? H2O. H2O who? H2O, it’s just me, a mermaid!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shell. Shell who? Shell-ebrate, it’s a mermaid joke!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Sandy. Sandy who? Sandy a mermaid to tell you this joke.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Pearl. Pearl who? Pearl, I’m not a mermaid. I’m a human dressed as one!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Coral. Coral who? Coral-ious mermaid jokes are the best!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fish. Fish who? Fish you were a mermaid, too!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bubbles. Bubbles who? Bubbles all around me, just like a mermaid in the sea!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tide. Tide who? Tide me over until I can swim with the mermaids.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Star. Star who? Star-ting to think this mermaid joke is getting old.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Jellyfish. Jellyfish who? Jelly-fish you were a mermaid!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Anchor. Anchor who? Anchor-other mermaid joke for you.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crustacean. Crustacean who? Crustacean of these jokes are about mermaids!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Seaweed. Seaweed who? Seaweed like to swim with the mermaids!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fin. Fin who? Fin-ish this joke already, I want to go mermaid spotting.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Kelp. Kelp who? Kelp me, I’m a stranded mermaid!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Nemo. Nemo who? Nemo-rable mermaid jokes are the best kind.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Siren. Siren who? Siren-ade! A perfect drink for a mermaid.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ocean. Ocean who? Ocean you glad I didn’t forget about the mermaid jokes?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Merman. Merman who? Merman you can be anything you want, even a mermaid!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Pufferfish. Pufferfish who? Pufferfish I was a mermaid, but I love telling jokes too much.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Barnacle. Barnacle who? Barnacle you come swim with me and the mermaids?
Making Waves with Mermaid Malapropisms: Diving into the Hilarious World of Undersea Word Play
- Flipperizing – Instead of “flipping,” it means to turn something into a dolphin-like creature.
- Seaweedless – The absence of seaweed, or a pun on the word “seedless.”
- Scalefool – Someone who is foolish about measuring things, or a pun on the word “scaleshell.”
- Shellfish-esteem – A mermaid’s self-confidence about her own shell.
- Waterlament – A mermaid’s sad and mournful song, or a play on the word “lament.”
- Starfishment – The act of collecting starfish for enjoyment or as a hobby.
- Splashback – When water splashes back into the ocean, or a play on the term “flashback.”
- Fishionable – Wearing fish-inspired clothing or accessories.
- Pirstorm – A storm made up of only piranhas, or a play on the word “pier.”
- Krillax – A laid-back and chill mermaid who loves to hang out with krill.
- Pincherosity – The quality of being stingy or greedy, or a pun on the word “pinch.”
- Tidalwavey – An enormous and unmanageably wavy hairstyle.
- Mermaidter – A mischievous and trouble-making mermaid, or a play on the word “mischief.”
- Drowning in Mermaids – A phrase used to describe being overwhelmed or surrounded by mermaids, or a play on the phrase “drowning in paperwork.”
- Clam-slamming – The act of slamming a clam shut, or a slang term for dancing with clams as an instrument.
- Ocean-motion – The movement of water caused by ocean currents, or a play on the phrase “locomotion.”
- Fin-dulgent – Excessively indulging in luxurious mermaid things, or a play on the word “indulgent.”
- Cod-swap – A mermaid’s version of a secret handshake or trade, or a play on the word “kidnap.”
- Scaloony – Extremely lucky or fortunate, or a pun on the word “scallop.”
- Merplastic – Made out of or resembling plastic, but with a mermaid twist.
Magical Misnomers: Spoonerisms about Sassy ‘Mermaids’!
- Merbaid Mead
- Mermy Daid
- Mermillar Daze
- Dermay Maim
- Medrum Aire
- Mermood Braids
- Merthday Bay
- Mermaid’s Scale woes
- Mold Mernaid
- Mindreading Mermate
- Marred Mermind
- Meadow Mearmaid
- Parmaise Yeardim
- Mermazing Maze
- Mermaid’s Fish list
- Mermaid’s Tailfail
- Melting Mermallow
- Meandering Mertail
- Merry Mermas
- Masterful Medusa (Oops, wrong mythological creature!)
Seas the Day with These Fin-tastic Mermaid Puns!
Well, my fin-tastic friends, that wraps up our pun-filled adventure through the magical world of mermaids. I hope you enjoyed swimming through over 230 puns and jokes about these mythical creatures. Don’t forget to check out our other related posts for even more laughs and groan-worthy puns. And always remember, when life gets rough, just keep swimming and let your inner mermaid shine. Cheers to making waves of laughter with these puns!