Monday Funnies: 230+ Jokes & Puns to Start Your Week with a Laugh
Hey there, all you Monday-haters! Ready for a dose of positivity and laughter to start your week off right? Well, you’re in luck because today’s post is all about the best puns and jokes about Mondays. Because let’s face it, Monday blues are real, but with a little bit of humor and clever wordplay, we can turn that frown upside down. So get your kids ready to giggle and dive into our list of hilarious Monday jokes that will make even the grumpiest person crack a smile. Let’s go spread some humor and turn this dreary day into a funny one!
Waking Up on the Right Side of ‘Monday’ with These Hilarious Picks – Puns & Jokes Galore!
- “Why did Monday refuse to lift weights? Because it’s always the heaviest day of the week!”
- “How do you make Monday more exciting? Add a little happy hour to Monday’s schedule!”
- “What is a Monday’s favorite type of music? Blues, of course!”
- “Why was Monday feeling jealous of Friday? Because everyone loves TGIF!”
- “Why did Monday go to the therapist? Because it’s always feeling blue.”
- “What did the calendar say to Monday? Same old, same old.”
- “Why did Monday skip breakfast? Because it’s the least important meal of the week!”
- “What did Monday say to the weekend? ‘Don’t leave me, I’ll be good!'”
- “Why did Monday make a reservation at the gym? To start the week off on the right foot!”
- “Why did Monday start dating Tuesday? To make Wednesday jealous!”
- What’s the best way to celebrate Monday? By pretending it’s Friday!”
- “Why does Monday always feel like a punch in the face? Because it follows the weekend.”
- “What did Monday say to Wednesday? ‘Hey, thanks for always making me look better!'”
- “Why did Monday wear sweatpants to work? Because it’s just too early for real pants.”
- “What’s Monday’s favorite pick-up line? ‘Are you a day of the week? Because I just can’t get you out of my mind!'”
- “Why did Monday delete all its social media accounts? To avoid being tagged as ‘the worst day of the week.'”
- “What did Monday say to Friday after a long week? ‘I’m just hanging on by a thread.'”
- “Why did Monday take a sick day? It was feeling a case of the Mondays.”
- “What’s Monday’s favorite holiday? Daylight Saving Time! One less hour of Monday!”
- “Why did Monday jump into the laundry basket? It wanted to go back to the weekend!”
Start Your Week off with a Smile: Hilarious ‘Funny Monday’ One-Liner Jokes
- I’m not a morning person, I’m a Monday person.
- Mondays are like math, just when you think you have them figured out, they change the formulas.
- The only thing keeping me going on a Monday is the thought of Friday.
- Mondays are the reason why coffee was invented.
- If Mondays had a face, I would punch it.
- I have a love-hate relationship with Mondays, I love to hate them.
- Monday: the adult version of waterboarding.
- Mondays are the worst four-letter word.
- Whoever said “There’s no such thing as a stupid question” never had a case of the Mondays.
- Mondays are like a bad dream that you can’t wake up from.
- Monday mornings should be illegal.
- If Mondays were shoes, they’d be Crocs.
- The only good thing about Mondays is that they remind me I survived another weekend.
- My brain is on Monday mode and my body is still in Sunday mode.
- How is it Monday already? I swear I just blinked.
- It takes me longer to get over Monday than it does to get over a breakup.
- Monday is like a punch in the face after a weekend of hugs.
- Whoever invented Mondays must have had a really good sense of humor.
- The only thing worse than a Monday is a rainy Monday.
- Monday: the day you realize that the weekend has officially left you.
Kicking off the week with a dose of humor: QnA Jokes & Puns about ‘Monday’!
- Q: Why did Monday refuse to go to work? A: Because it was feeling a case of the mondays.
- Q: What do you call a sheep who hates Mondays? A: A baah-humbug.
- Q: What did Monday say to Friday? A: Thank God you’re here, Monday’s the worst!
- Q: Why was Monday always hungry? A: Because it never had a Sundae.
- Q: What did Monday say to its coffee? A: Let’s kick this week off!
- Q: What’s the best thing about Mondays? A: It’s only 4 more days until Friday!
- Q: Why did the calendar skip Monday? A: It was afraid of getting a case of the Mondays.
- Q: What do you get when you cross Monday and a snake? A: A little bit of ‘Mon-slay’.
- Q: How does Monday always look so fresh and rested? A: It never had a weekend to ruin its beauty sleep.
- Q: What did Monday say to Friday about the weekend? A: You can have it! I don’t want it anymore.
- Q: How many Mondays does it take to change a light bulb? A: None, they’re too busy hating on the weekend.
- Q: Why was Monday always feeling blue? A: It couldn’t find its true colors.
- Q: What do you call a Monday that’s acting suspicious? A: Monday-ful intentions.
- Q: What do you call a Monday wearing a disguise? A: A Fri-day imposter.
- Q: How do you make Monday less depressing? A: Add some ice cream, then it becomes Sundae.
- Q: What’s the best way to make sure Monday doesn’t ruin your day? A: Sleep through it.
- Q: Why did Monday go on a diet? A: Because Tuesday told it to lose a pound.
- Q: How does Monday feel about going to the gym? A: It’s all cardio, no fun-day.
- Q: What do you say to Monday when it’s especially cruel? A: You’re not my cup of tea, but you’re my daily grind.
- Q: How does Monday feel about afternoon meetings? A: It thinks they should be called ‘Mourn-day’ meetings.
Start the Week with a Smile: Dad Jokes about Monday
- Why did Monday cross the road? To get to the other weekdays!
- Why did the calendar start on Sunday and not Monday? Because Sunday was feeling lazy and didn’t want to do any work!
- Why did the skeleton refuse to work on Mondays? Because he was bone-tired!
- How do you make a Monday better? Add a little Funday to it!
- What kind of tea do dads drink on Mondays? Mon-Tea!
- Why did the lemon dread Mondays? Because they’re always so sour!
- How many Monday jokes are there? Just one, everything else is true!
- What did the calendar say after Monday? “Days like these are just a phase!”
- How do you know when a Monday is almost over? You can see the light at the end of the tunnel!
- Why did the banana dislike Mondays? Because they always have a peel-y bad start!
- What did the broom say on Monday morning? “I swept the day away!”
- Why were all the days of the week jealous of Monday? Because it had a strong case of the Mundays!
- What do you call a tired Monday? A Mon-daze!
- How do you keep Monday from feeling too long? Make it a holiday!
- Why did the clock refuse to tick on Monday? Because it was feeling sluggish!
- How do you know if it’s Monday or Friday? Just check the office water cooler, it’s usually empty on Mondays!
- Why did the math book hate Mondays? Because it always had a case of the Monday-fractions!
- How many Mondays does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let’s just sit in the dark and wait for Tuesday!
- Why did Monday insist on being the first day of the week? Because it wanted to start things off with a BANG!
- What did the Monday say to the weekend? “I hope you had a good rest, cause it’s your turn to bring the energy now!”
Unleash the Monday giggles with these hilarious quotes -because we all need a good laugh to start the week!
- “Mondays are like a bad boyfriend – you keep hoping they’ll change, but they just disappoint you every time.”
- “Monday is the perfect day to start dieting, because you’ll be too depressed to eat.”
- “If Mondays had a face, I’d punch it. Repeatedly.”
- “Monday: the only day of the week that feels like a whole year.”
- “Mondays are like insurance – necessary but a total drag.”
- “I have a love-hate relationship with Monday – I love to hate it.”
- “Why do they call it Monday? It’s more like ‘Meh-day’ to me.”
- “Monday should be optional. Just like pants.”
- “My therapist said I need to work on my positive attitude towards Mondays. I told her I’d rather work on my hatred for them.”
- “I can’t decide what’s worse – waking up on Monday or realizing it’s only Monday.”
- “Monday: when coffee and sarcasm are the only things that get me through the day.”
- “The best part of Monday is when it’s over.”
- “Dear Monday, can you please just chill for once?”
- “I’m pretty sure Monday was invented by someone who hates happiness.”
- “Mondays are like spaghetti – no matter how hard you try, you can’t escape them.”
- “I haven’t decided if it’s the alarm clock or Monday that makes me want to throw things.”
- “Monday is proof that even the calendar hates us.”
- “I have a case of the Mondays… and Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays.”
- “Monday: because who doesn’t love starting their week with a mental breakdown?”
- “I’m not saying I hate Mondays, but if Mondays were a person, I’d punch them in the face.”
Start Your Week with a Laugh: Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Monday
- “Monday: the only day of the week that needs a warning label.”
- “Roses are red, Monday is blue, my alarm clock hates me, how about you?”
- “Monday: when coffee isn’t a want, it’s a need.”
- “I have a love-hate relationship with Mondays, but mostly it’s just hate.”
- “Mondays were created to punish us for all the fun we had over the weekend.”
- “Mondays are like a bad ex, they always come back to ruin your day.”
- “The only thing worse than a Monday is a Monday after vacation.”
- “Mondays are like a math problem, you’re never sure if you got the right answer.”
- “I never make it to work on time on Mondays, but I’m always early for happy hour on Friday.”
- “The only thing that gets me through Monday mornings is knowing I’m one day closer to Friday.”
- “On Mondays, even my coffee needs coffee.”
- “Mondays: proof that there is an actual day worse than Sunday.”
- “Mondays are God’s way of saying even the best things have to come to an end.”
- “The worst part about Mondays is realizing it’s only the beginning of the week.”
- “My doctor prescribed me with a daily dose of sarcasm to help me get through Mondays.”
- “Mondays are like a kick in the shin, except it lasts for the whole day.”
- “Dear Monday, if you’re going to be this awful, could you at least bring donuts?”
- “Monday mornings are proof that Satan created alarm clocks.”
- “If Mondays had a mascot, it would be a grumpy cat.”
- “The only good thing about Mondays is that it makes Tuesdays seem so much better.”
Kicking Off the Week with Ample ‘Mon-d-ay’ Double Entendres Puns
- “Looks like Monday’s got a case of the Mondays!”
- “I wouldn’t wish a Monday on my worst enemy!”
- “Why did the chicken cross the road on Monday? To get to the other side of the workweek!”
- “I’m just trying to survive until Friday on this Monday journey.”
- “I think Monday is secretly a Monday in disguise.”
- “I don’t always have a bad day, but when I do, it’s usually a Monday.”
- “Monday’s got me feeling like a Garfield in a room full of lasagna.”
- “I have a love-hate relationship with Mondays – mostly hate.”
- “What’s the difference between a Monday and a good day? About a million cups of coffee.”
- “Why did the calendar skip from Sunday to Monday? Because no one likes Mondays.”
- “It’s amazing how much work I can get done when I’m procrastinating on a Monday.”
- “I can’t adult today, I’m too busy adulting on this Monday.”
- “Why is it called Monday instead of just ‘ugh’?”
- “I hear Monday and I automatically reach for my coffee.”
- “If Monday had a theme song, it would be ‘Another One Bites the Dust’.”
- “My therapist says I have a fear of Mondays – I prefer to call it ‘Mondayphobia’.”
- “I always have a hard time getting up on Mondays – I think I ate my willpower for breakfast.”
- “I don’t have a case of the Mondays, I have a case of the Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays…”
- “I may have a stick up my butt on Mondays, but at least I’m not a stick in the mud.”
- “Why did the tomato turn red on a Monday? Because it saw the salad dressing!”
Feeling the ‘Monday’ Blues? Here are Some ‘Recursive’ Puns to Get you Through!
- “I tried to make a joke about Monday, but it just keeps repeating itself…it’s a Mon-day loop!”
- “Why did the calendar break up with Monday? Because it got tired of its repetitive behavior.”
- “What do you call a day that’s constantly rebooting itself? A Mon-day.”
- “I made a joke about procrastinating on Monday, but then I realized I’d just be putting the ‘pro’ in ‘procrastinate.'”
- “Monday always feels like Groundhog Day…but without the cute furry creature.”
- “Why is Monday like a stubborn toddler? Because it refuses to let go of the weekend.”
- “I tried to tell a joke about Monday, but it just kept looping back to ‘ugh, it’s Monday.'”
- “If Mondays had a theme song, it would be ‘I Will Survive’ by Gloria Gaynor.”
- “Monday and I have a love-hate relationship…more like a hate-hate relationship.”
- “Why does Monday always bring the same challenges? It’s just stuck in a Mon-day déjà vu.”
- “I can never get over how Mondays always come back around…it’s like they have Monday-cycles.”
- “Monday is like a broken record…it just keeps going around and around and nothing changes.”
- “I told a joke about Monday, but it’s still processing…it’s more like a Mon-day loading bar.”
- “If Monday had a superpower, it would be the ability to make time feel like it’s standing still.”
- “Why does Monday always have to remind me of my responsibilities? It’s like the big brother of the week.”
- “Monday is like a recurring nightmare…but with responsibilities.”
- “I tried to avoid Monday, but it just kept reappearing…it’s like a bad Pennywise joke.”
- “You know you’re getting old when you start dreading Mondays more than a dentist appointment.”
- “Why is Monday like a lazy river? Because it just keeps going in circles.”
- “I made a joke about Monday, but it turned into a whole comedic routine…it’s just so easy to pick on.”
Manic Monday Tom Swifties: A Punny Way to Kickoff the Week!
- “I can’t believe it’s already Monday!” Tom sighed wearily.
- “I always dread Mondays,” Tom moaned listlessly.
- “I need a vacation from Mondays,” Tom declared exhaustedly.
- “I’m not ready for the workweek to start,” Tom whined unenthusiastically.
- “Another case of the Mondays,” Tom grumbled disheartenedly.
- “Someone forgot to set the alarm for Monday,” Tom muttered sleepily.
- “Mondays make me feel like I’ve been run over by a steamroller,” Tom groaned achingly.
- “I wish Monday would take a permanent vacation,” Tom joked sarcastically.
- “My Monday blues are turning into Monday purples,” Tom quipped dramatically.
- “Mondays should be banned,” Tom suggested severely.
- “I think I left my motivation at home on Monday,” Tom mumbled lackadaisically.
- “Can I trade my Monday for a margarita?” Tom questioned thirstily.
- “Monday, you have officially ruined my weekend buzz,” Tom complained drolly.
- “Only Monday could make me feel like a sloth on steroids,” Tom grunted sluggishly.
- “Just when I thought Mondays couldn’t get any worse,” Tom moaned grimly.
- “I have a feeling today is going to be a total Mon-daze,” Tom joked woozily.
- “Is it just me, or are Mondays on some kind of personal vendetta against me?” Tom pondered conspiratorially.
- “I have a love-hate relationship with Monday – mostly hate,” Tom admitted reluctantly.
- “I’ll start my diet on Monday… again,” Tom vowed half-heartedly.
- “I’m pretty sure Monday was created by Satan himself,” Tom jested darkly.
Knock, knock. Who’s There? A Hilarious Monday Knock-Knock Joke!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cargo. Cargo who? Cargo Monday be over yet?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad it’s Monday?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Justin. Justin who? Justin time for another Monday!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Olive. Olive who? Olive Mondays, they are the pits.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Boo. Boo who? Boo-who, it’s only Monday.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lettuce. Lettuce who? Lettuce make it through this Monday together.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Candice. Candice who? Candice soothe my Monday blues.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Finn. Finn who? Finn-ally it’s Monday!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Honeydew. Honeydew who? Honeydew you want to forget it’s Monday.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dwayne. Dwayne who? Dwayne the week is starting again, I’ll cry if I want to.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Hoo-hoo. Hoo-hoo who? Hoo-hoo is glad it’s Monday, NOT me!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Alpaca. Alpaca who? Alpaca my bags and leave work on Monday!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Gladys. Gladys who? Gladys Monday is just once a week.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Carmen. Carmen who? Carmen sheat this Monday already?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Viola. Viola who? Viola, this Monday is starting to feel like a viola-ation of my time.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Avery. Avery who? Avery Monday is a new opportunity to procrastinate.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Quiche. Quiche who? Quiche looking so forward to Monday.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Roxie. Roxie who? Roxie in the early morning, why is it already Monday?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fiona. Fiona who? Fiona let me have a few more hours of sleep on Monday.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Griffin. Griffin who? Griffin me a break, it’s just Monday!
Shake off the ‘Monday’ blues with these hilarious malapropisms!
- Monsoonday – a rainy Monday
- Munchday – when you eat your way through Monday
- Mugglesday – a Monday when everyone is acting clueless
- Monstrosity – a really terrible Monday
- Monkeyday – a chaotic and unpredictable Monday
- Moonday – a Monday when everyone is feeling spacey
- Muffinday – when you bring muffins to work on Monday to make it better
- Monsoonroom – the room you hide in on a bad Monday
- Mundaneday – a monotonous and dull Monday
- Monochrome – a Monday that feels like all shades of grey
- Moodswingsday – a Monday when emotions are all over the place
- Monotaur – a coworker who is also having a terrible Monday
- Moondance – when you dance to celebrate surviving Monday
- Marmaladecat – a lazy and unproductive Monday
- Mosquiday – a Monday where everything feels like it’s bugging you
- Moonlighting – working overtime on a Monday
- Missileday – a Monday that feels like it’s out to get you
- Momday – a day of endless chores and responsibilities, also known as Monday
- Mondayze – when you daydream about escaping work on a Monday
- Molasses Day – a slow and dragging Monday
Manic Mondays – Fun Spoonerisms about Monday
- Mumbling Bunch
- Sandy Moos
- Worry Moon
- Napping Mundy
- Mad Bun
- Tooth Hun
- Chilly Bun
- Droning Laggies
- Sploshy Mop
- Fanny Mrupey
- Funny Bonday
- Runny Morning
- Silly Munday
- Money Bowers
- Dizzy Mongoon
- Jumpy Bonfire
- Blurry Moonshine
- Sunny Morday
- Crunchy Moobs
- Plummy Bonding
Leaving you laughing all the way till Friday
And that, my friends, wraps up our list of puns about everyone’s favorite day of the week – Monday. Now if only Mondays were half as amusing as these puns, we’d all be looking forward to them. But don’t worry, there are plenty more hilarious puns and jokes waiting for you in our other related posts. So go ahead, give them a read and brighten up your not-so-blue Monday!