125+ Motorcycle Jokes & Puns: You’ve Been Wheelied In!
Get ready to rev your engines and laugh your helmets off because we’re about to take you on a wild ride through the best motorcycle jokes and puns! This list is packed with enough humor and clever wordplay to make even the most serious biker crack a smile. Did you know that the longest motorcycle in the world is over 82 feet long? Well, get ready for a joke list almost as long because we’ve got more puns than you can shake a kickstand at. So, buckle up, hold on tight, and get ready for some positive vibes and side-splitting motorcycle humor!
Top Motorcycle Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks: For Wheely Funny People
- Why don’t motorcycles stand up on their own? They’re two tired.
- My motorcycle’s life story is always on the edge …of my seat.
- What’s a biker’s favorite type of music? Anything with a heavy metal beat.
- My motorcycle isn’t that impressive. It only has one gear. Fifth.
- I wanted a motorcycle themed wedding… But I couldn’t find a vicar who’d let us ride down the aisle.
- How do you get two dirt bikes to fight with each other? Introduce a cat.
- That biker is such a show off …He probably polishes his shadow.
- Did you hear about the motorcycle that won an award? It was an honorary cycle.
- My motorcycle broke down in front of a bank. Now my engine gets serviced more than my account.
- What do you call it when a biker is sad? Blue rider.
- Borrowing a biker’s motorcycle …is wheely dangerous.
- The motorcycle police officer couldn’t catch the speeding banana… because it slipped out of his clutch.
- Always check your mirrors when lane splitting …it’s a matter of cycle and death.
- Never ask a biker why he loves riding so much …You’ll be there for hours.
- I tried starting my motorcycle in my apartment. My neighbors weren’t thrilled.
Funny Motorcycle One-Liner Jokes: For a Wheely Good Laugh
- I wanted to buy a motorcycle made of pure energy, but then I realized it would be too exhausted all the time.
- My friend said his motorcycle runs on water. I guess that’s why it keeps stalling.
- Why did the motorcycle fall over in the bakery? It was two tired.
- My motorcycle is so mean, it kicks start on the first try. My leg, on the other hand…
- Used to ride a motorcycle made of spare parts. Real Frankenstein ride – it had a monstrous kick!
- You know you’re a true biker when your idea of a traffic jam is a closed visor.
- Just saw a ghost riding a motorcycle. Pretty spooky, but he did nail that wheelie!
- Why are motorcycle cops such bad poker players? They always keep bluffing with their handlebars.
- Bought a motorcycle with a built-in GPS. Turns out it just yells, “Go faster!” at every turn.
- My motorcycle GPS is broken. Now, I just follow the guy in front of me… which would be fine, but he’s riding a lawnmower.
- My wife wants a divorce. She says I love my motorcycle more than her. What a hogwash!
- Why don’t they play poker in the rainforest? Too many cheetahs… and one Kawasaki.
- My motorcycle is like a time machine. The faster I go, the less time I have to listen to people tell me to slow down.
- My therapist told me to confront my fears head-on. So, I rode my motorcycle straight into a wall. Turns out, fear was right!
- You can tell if someone’s from a wealthy family – their vintage motorcycle will have never seen a greasy wrench, let alone a repair shop!
- I told my mechanic my motorcycle keeps talking to me. He said, “That’s just the chain, you moron!”
- My motorcycle may not talk, but it sure knows how to say, “Get a job!” with its empty gas tank.
QnA Jokes & Puns about Motorcycle: Get Your Motor Running with Laughter
- Q: Why don’t motorcycles ever get lost? A: They have handlebars to steer them right!
- Q: What’s a biker’s favorite type of music? A: Anything with a good beat… literally!
- Q: Why did the motorcycle fall in love with the dirt bike? A: It was attracted to its rugged good looks and down-to-earth personality!
- Q: What do you call a motorcycle that transforms into a robot? A: A Harley-Davidson Prime!
- Q: What do you get if you cross a motorcycle and a frog? A: A motorbike that’s always hopping mad!
- Q: Why did the motorcycle get a job at the bank? A: It was good with handle bars!
- Q: Why did the motorcycle cross the playground? A: To get to the other slide!
- Q: What’s a biker’s favorite drink? A: Engine-uity! (Ingenuity)
- Q: Why don’t they play cards in the motorcycle club? A: Too many revs (revs/revs)
- Q: What’s a biker’s favorite Shakespeare play? A: Hamletbike!
- Q: How do motorcycles greet each other? A: “Hey, long time no wheelie!”
- Q: What do you call a lazy kangaroo on a motorcycle? A: A pouch potato!
- Q: Why did the motorcycle break up with the scooter? A: It said the scooter was “two-tired” of its antics!
- Q: What did the motorcycle say to the red light? A: “Don’t worry, I’ll be seeing you shortly.”
- Q: What’s a motorcycle’s favorite type of movie? A: Anything with a chase scene!
- Q: Why are motorcycles so cool? A: They’re always geared for a good time!
- Q: What happens when a motorcycle breaks the sound barrier? A: It gets a speeding ticket… eventually!
Dad Jokes about Motorcycle: Revving You Up With Laughter
- Why don’t motorcycles ever get lost? Because they’re always on the road to success!
- What’s a biker’s favorite type of music? Anything with a good beat!
- Why did the motorcycle go to the doctor? It was feeling a little wheelie!
- Why did the motorcycle blush? Because it saw the salad dressing! (Get it? Thousand Island…?)
- I used to be addicted to soap… but I’m clean now. So I got a motorcycle!
- Why was the baby motorcycle always crying? It missed its mommy-cycle.
- What do you call a motorcycle that can’t slow down? A terminal velocity!
- My wife told me to take the spider out instead of killing it. So I took it for a ride on my motorcycle.
- Always wear a helmet when riding a motorcycle. It’s a no-brainer!
- Why don’t they play poker in the jungle? Too many cheetahs… and Harley riders!
- Where do motorcycles go on vacation? Wheel-isney World!
- My motorcycle is so loud, it’s got the EPA on speed dial!
- I bought a dirt bike the other day. Turns out, it was just a regular motorcycle covered in dirt!
Funny Quotes and Captions about Motorcycle for a Wheely Good Laugh
- “Motorcycles: Because cars never really understood the ‘wind in your hair’ look.”
- “I’m not saying I’m addicted to motorcycles, but I do name all my wrenches.”
- “My therapist told me to find a hobby. Now I have 3 motorcycles and a shed full of parts. Thanks, doc.”
- “Sleep? What’s sleep? I thought you said ‘ride motorcycles’?”
- “Life’s too short for traffic jams. Get a motorcycle and filter through the tears of your enemies.”
- “Motorcycles: Cheaper than therapy, and you arrive angrier.”
- “Forget horses, I’d rather ride something with more horsepower.”
- “I wouldn’t trade my motorcycle for the world. But I might consider it for a faster motorcycle.”
- “Yes officer, I did see the speed limit. It just looked a little lonely.” (Please be responsible and obey traffic laws!)
- “My motorcycle isn’t leaking oil, it’s just marking its territory.”
- “You know you’re a true biker when your idea of a good time involves bugs, sunburn, and the open road.”
- “Don’t worry, I’m a responsible motorcycle rider. I have a helmet, gloves… and a really good lawyer.”
- “Motorcycles: The only vehicles where you can literally wear your midlife crisis.”
- “I don’t need anger management. I just need to ride my motorcycle.”
- “Warning: May spontaneously decide to go on a 500-mile road trip.”
- “My other vehicle is a roaring beast of freedom and chrome.”
Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Motorcycle: Ride, Laugh, & Repeat
- A rolling motorcycle gathers no moss… just admiring stares.
- Don’t put the kickstand before the motorcycle. (A twist on “Don’t put the cart before the horse”)
- You can lead a biker to a bar, but you can’t make him park in the back.
- There’s no such thing as bad weather, just the wrong motorcycle gear.
- Early to bed, early to rise, makes a biker healthy, wealthy, and wise to customize.
- A motorcycle in the hand is worth two on Craigslist.
- Never ask a biker about their mileage unless you have time for a long story.
- Two wheels move the soul, four wheels move the cargo.
- Measure a biker by the dirt on their bike, not the price tag on their jacket.
- If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, ride with someone who knows how to fix a flat tire.
- A motorcycle ride a day keeps the therapist away.
- Don’t fear death, fear a life without motorcycle rides.
- Life is a journey, enjoy the ride, preferably on two wheels.
- Happiness isn’t around the corner, it’s down the open road, on a motorcycle.
- You’re not lost on a motorcycle, you’re just exploring new roads.
- A little bit of chrome polish goes a long way… especially if you spill it on your leather seat.
Motorcycle Double Entendres Puns: A Wheely Funny Ride
- I tried to have a serious conversation with my motorcycle, but it just kept going off on tangents.
- My motorcycle is so insecure. It always feels like it’s two tired.
- I bought a vintage motorcycle online, but when I got it, I realized it was a hoax-cycle.
- That biker is so tough, even his motorcycle has a beard.
- My motorcycle’s fuel economy is amazing; it runs on fumes and my wild dreams.
- My dating life is like a motorcycle with a flat tire. I’m stuck and going nowhere fast.
- My motorcycle is a terrible liar. Every time it tries to pull a fast one, I can hear the exhaust.
- I took my motorcycle to therapy, but it just kept hogging the sidecar.
- That motorcycle gang is so hardcore; their bikes run on black coffee and pure adrenaline.
- That motorcycle is so loud, it needs to be seen and not horn.
- I tried to teach my motorcycle how to swim, but it just went in circles.
- My motorcycle is a terrible dancer; it has two left pedals.
- She said she wanted a man who rode a motorcycle. Apparently, my bicycle didn’t count. Now I’m wheely sad.
- I’m starting a motorcycle repair shop specializing in custom horns. It’s going to be called “Hog Wild Noise.”
- My motorcycle is starting to get long in the tooth. I guess it’s time to trade it in for a new set of handlebars.
Funny Motorcycle Tom Swifties: Geared Up for Laughs
- “My motorcycle’s kickstand broke,” Tom said dejectedly.
- “I just rode my motorcycle through a swarm of bees,” Tom said unbeelievably.
- “This motorcycle gets terrible gas mileage,” Tom said fuelishly.
- “Hold on tight, this could be a bumpy ride!” Tom said exhaustedly.
- “I think my motorcycle is possessed,” Tom said spookily.
- “My motorcycle won’t start!” Tom said excitedly.
- “This motorcycle cost me an arm and a leg!” Tom said disarmingly.
- “I love the sound of my motorcycle’s engine,” Tom roared triumphantly.
- “I can’t find my motorcycle helmet anywhere!” Tom said headlessly.
- “My motorcycle only has two wheels,” Tom said bicycle-ically.
- “My leather jacket keeps me warm on my motorcycle,” Tom said hideously.
- “I’m going to ride my motorcycle off this ramp!” Tom said wheelie excitedly.
- “I think I need a bigger motorcycle,” Tom said overwhelmingly.
- “That biker gang looked pretty mean,” Tom said nervously.
- “This dirt bike can handle any terrain,” Tom said dirtily.
- “I left my motorcycle keys in the ignition,” Tom said ignominiously.
- “My motorcycle club is having a bake sale,” Tom said sweetly.
Knock-knock Jokes about Motorcycle: You’ll Rev-el in These
- Knock, knock. >Who’s there? Harley. >Harley who? Harley-ously funny, right? Get it?
- Knock, knock. >Who’s there? Engine. >Engine who? Engine-ious humor, don’t you think?
- Knock, knock. >Who’s there? Spokes. >Spokes who? Spokes too soon? Well, get ready for another one!
- Knock, knock. >Who’s there? Kickstand. >Kickstand who? Kickstand back and enjoy the laughs, we’re not done yet!
- Knock, knock. >Who’s there? Two Tired. >Two Tired who? Two tired to walk, that’s why I need a motorcycle!
- Knock, knock. >Who’s there? Chrome. >Chrome who? Chrome-ing around on my bike all day, it’s a beautiful thing!