100+ Pumpkin Jokes & Puns: You've Gotta Be Gourd-geous!

Get ready to carve out some laughter because you’ve stumbled upon the best pumpkin jokes this side of the patch! We’ve got a list of puns and humor so funny, it’s scary. This isn’t just your average pumpkin spice latte of laughter; it’s the whole gourd! Did you know? A pumpkin is technically a fruit, not a vegetable. But don’t worry, these puns and jokes are clever, positive, and 100% funny! Get ready to laugh your gourd out loud!

Top Pumpkin Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks: Gourd-geous Jokes Inside

What did the pumpkin say after Thanksgiving? “I’m feeling gutted!”
I’m starting a pumpkin carving business. It’s really gonna carve out a niche.
Why did the pumpkin cross the road? To prove he wasn’t chicken!
Did you hear about the pumpkin’s promotion? He’s now the gourd of honor.
What do you call a sad pumpkin? Melon-choly.
Pumpkin spice lattes are out! Feeling very gourd-geous today.
My wife loves pumpkin spice everything. I call her my Basic Gourd.
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite genre? Pulp fiction.
Just saw a ghost in the pumpkin patch! Must be a specter-pumpkin.
I’m making a scarecrow costume. Pumpkin to impress.
My therapist told me to express my feelings. So I threw a pumpkin at him.
Feeling pretty empty after Halloween. Must be the post-pumpkin spice blues.
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite sport? Squash!
Went to a party with a jack-o’-lantern. He really lit up the room.
Don’t be a scaredy-cat… It’s just a pumpkin patch, not a frighten patch!

Funny Pumpkin Jokes With One Liner Clever Pumpkin Puns at PunnyFunny.com

Funny Pumpkin One-Liner Jokes For A Gourd Time

I’m trying to come up with a pumpkin spice latte pun, but I haven’t gotten a latte success.
What do you call a pumpkin that works at a construction site? A gourd-worker!
Why did the pumpkin fail its driving test? It couldn’t squash the accelerator.
I tried to make a pumpkin carving of my ex… but my heart just wasn’t gourd in it.
You know what they say, you can’t judge a pumpkin by its gourd.
Some people say love is blind, but I fell in love at the pumpkin patch – it must be the pumpkin spice in the air.
What did the baby pumpkin say to its mama? “I love you a whole gourd!”
I tried to make a pumpkin smoothie… turned out quite seedy, if you ask me.
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite genre? Pulp fiction.
My therapist told me to talk to my inner child more… Turns out it really likes pumpkin spice lattes!
You think carving pumpkins is easy? Try explaining to a six year old that it’s supposed to be scary, not a portrait of their hamster.
What do you call a dishonest pumpkin? A gourd-geous liar.
I wanted to grow a square pumpkin for Halloween… but they only come in one gourd.
I went to a pumpkin carving contest and they disqualified my entry. They said I was pushing the gourd-aries.
I’m starting my pumpkin spice diet tomorrow. Gonna squash my cravings once and for all!
Don’t tell anyone, but I put on a pumpkin spice latte scented candle just so people would think I’m baking. The gourd honest truth is, I’m eating leftover Halloween candy.

QnA Jokes & Puns about Pumpkin: Get Your Gourd On!

Q: What did the baby pumpkin say to its mama? A: I’m seed-iously cute!
Q: Why did the pumpkin fail its driver’s test? A: It kept on squashing the gas pedal!
Q: What do you call a pumpkin that works at a construction site? A: A jack-of-all-trades-o-lantern!
Q: Why did the pumpkin get lost in the corn maze? A: Because it couldn’t find its gourd-friend!
Q: What’s a pumpkin’s favorite genre of music? A: Anything but heavy metal – they’re more into punkin!
Q: Why don’t pumpkins do well in school? A: They have trouble focusing – their minds tend to wander!
Q: What do you get if you cross a pumpkin and a sheep? A: A pumpkin spice baa-rista!
Q: What’s a pumpkin’s favorite type of car? A: A Pump-orghini!
Q: What’s it called when a pumpkin proposes? A: Popping the question!
Q: Why did the pumpkin cross the road? A: To prove he wasn’t a chicken gourd!
Q: What did the pumpkin say after winning the costume contest? A: I’m so gourd-geous!
Q: What do you call a stolen pumpkin? A: A squash and grab!
Q: Why are pumpkins better at baseball than watermelons? A: Because they have more seeds to hit home runs!
Q: What’s a pumpkin’s favorite dating app? A: Plenty of Fis-gourds!
Q: What’s a pumpkin’s favorite holiday after Halloween? A: Thanks-gourding!
Q: Why don’t mummies go on vacation? A: They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind!
Q: Why did the scarecrow win an award? A: Because he was outstanding in his field!

Dad Jokes about Pumpkin: They’re Hilarious Gourd Times

Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a porch gourd!
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite genre? Pulp fiction!
Why don’t pumpkins like to race each other? They’re afraid of a squash buckle!
What did the baby pumpkin say to its mother? “I’m so gourd-geous!”
You know, back in my day, pumpkins were only a dollar… We didn’t have all this inflation!
What do you call a pumpkin that robs a bank? A cash-o’-lantern!
I saw a car full of pumpkins earlier… Must have been a gourd-eous sight to see!
What do you call a group of singing pumpkins? A gourd band!
I tried to make pumpkin spice latte at home… Turns out, you can’t just tell a pumpkin your problems.
I wanted to give my friend some pumpkin carving tips… But I couldn’t find the right words to express myself!
What position do pumpkins play in baseball? They’re always the designated hitter!
My wife said she wanted a “decorative” pumpkin… So I dressed it up in a tiny tuxedo!
Why are round pumpkins always picked last? Because they’re never gourd-geous enough!
What do you call a pumpkin carving competition? A carve-nival!
I went to the pumpkin patch to find the perfect one… But they only had stemmed options!

Funny Quotes and Captions about Pumpkin: Perfect for Your Gourd-geous Photos

“I’m so obsessed with pumpkins, I’m basically living that gourd life.”
“My therapist told me to embrace my flaws. So I made them into a pumpkin spice latte.”
“I’m not saying I’m basic, but I did just break my neck trying to get the perfect pumpkin patch selfie.”
“My love for pumpkin spice is like a scary movie marathon: never-ending and slightly terrifying.”
“What do you call a pumpkin that tries to take over the world? Pumpk-tyrant!”
“My blood type is PSL. Pumpkin Spice Latte, obviously.”
“I’m not sure what’s rounder, my belly after pumpkin pie or the pumpkins themselves.”
“Spooktacular news: My tolerance for pumpkin-flavored things is officially gourd-geous.”
“You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy a pumpkin spice latte, and that’s basically the same thing… right?”
“Found my soulmate – turns out they’re also a pumpkin spice latte enthusiast. We just click.”
“Don’t tell my pumpkin, but I think this year’s jack-o’-lantern might be even more handsome.”
“Pretty sure my DNA test results came back 99.9% pumpkin spice.”
“Just saw a pumpkin spice scented candle that said ‘fall vibes.’ Yeah, I vibe with that.”
“My life is basically a pumpkin patch right now: cute, a little messy, and definitely going to be haunted soon.”
“Spent all day arguing with my pumpkin about whether to carve a scary or funny face. It’s pretty intense.”
“I’m just a humble pumpkin spice enthusiast, trying to make it through a world full of regular coffee drinkers.”

Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Pumpkin: For Gourd Times and Bad

A rolling pumpkin gathers no moss, but it might just find a pumpkin spice latte.
Don’t carve your pumpkin until you’ve picked it, unless you’re into abstract art.
You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him carve a pumpkin. (Unless he’s a very talented horse.)
A watched pumpkin never boils… because it’s not supposed to.
Many hands make light work, especially when carving a giant pumpkin.
Don’t count your pumpkin seeds before they’re roasted.
An apple a day keeps the doctor away, but a pumpkin a day keeps everyone away if you carve it scary enough.
Where there’s smoke, there’s fire… unless it’s a pumpkin spice candle, then there’s just deliciousness.
The proof is in the pumpkin pie.
You can’t judge a pumpkin by its stem, but you can judge it by its hilarious jack-o’-lantern face.
Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither was the Great Pumpkin.
All good things must come to an end, like pumpkin spice season, but fear not, it will return!
Don’t put all your pumpkins in one basket, unless you’re making a giant pumpkin pie.
The grass is always greener in the pumpkin patch… or at least more orange.
A penny saved is a penny earned, but a pumpkin saved is a future jack-o’-lantern.
Love is like a pumpkin spice latte, it’s warm, comforting, and inevitably followed by disappointment when the season ends. (Just kidding… maybe.)

Pumpkin Double Entendres Puns to Spice Up Your Fall

I’m so attracted to you, I think you’re gourd-geous. (Gorgeous/Gourd)
You must be a pumpkin spice latte, because I’m falling for you. (Popular fall drink/ Literally falling)
I met my significant other at a pumpkin patch… guess you could say it was love at first carve. (First sight/Pumpkin carving)
This pumpkin carving is really turning me on… things are about to get steamy in here. (Exciting/referring to the heat of carving tools)
Let’s get together and carve out some time for each other… maybe even some pumpkins too. (Make time for each other/pumpkin carving activity)
Baby, you’re the cream to my pumpkin spice. (Pumpkin spice latte ingredient/Romantic pairing)
I like my partners like I like my jack-o’-lanterns: lit. (Attractive /illuminated)
That pumpkin’s got a real stem on it! (Plant part / suggestive slang)
I love you more than pumpkin spice, and that’s saying something. (Obsession with pumpkin spice/Declaration of love)
Let’s squash the competition and go out already. (Defeat / reference to pumpkin family)
Are you a pumpkin patch? Because I’m lost in your eyes. (Vastness of pumpkin patch / getting lost in someone’s eyes)
This pumpkin’s so big, it must be an honor student at gourd school! (Large size / play on Harvard)
You looking gourd? Or are you just happy to see me? (Looking good / play on excited greeting)
Can I buy you a drink? You’re really rockin’ that stem. (Part of a pumpkin / Attractive body part)
I’m here for a gourd time, not a long time. Let’s carve it up! (Good time / Pumpkin carving)
Can you hold my pumpkin? I’ve gotta go slip into something more comfortable. (Seasonal fruit/ Suggestive clothing change)
That’s not a pumpkin…THIS is a pumpkin! (Size comparison / Innuendo)

Funny Pumpkin Tom Swifties for a Gourd Time

“This pumpkin is awfully heavy!” Tom said ponderously.
“Look, I carved a sailboat into my pumpkin!” Tom said ship-ishly.
“These pumpkin seeds are unsalted!” Tom declared plainly.
“I think I over-spiced this pumpkin pie,” Tom said gingerly.
“I’m going to grow the biggest pumpkin ever!” Tom proclaimed ambitiously.
“I used a melon baller for my pumpkin carving,” Tom said roundly.
“This pumpkin pie is missing something…” Tom said crust-fallen.
“Don’t forget to roast the pumpkin seeds!” Tom reminded salt-ily.
“Winning the pumpkin carving contest was easy!” Tom said smugly.
“That’s a terrible jack-o’-lantern design,” Tom said superficially.
“My pumpkin bread always rises perfectly,” Tom stated loaf-tily.
“Is it too early for a pumpkin spice latte?” questioned Tom prematurely.
“I accidentally dropped the pumpkin!” Tom said smashingly.
“My pumpkin soup could use more seasoning,” Tom said blandly.
“This pumpkin spice latte is lukewarm,” Tom said tepidly.
“We’re lost in the pumpkin patch!” Tom said field-ishly.
“This pumpkin-shaped cookie is adorable!” Tom exclaimed sweetly.

Knock-Knock Jokes about Pumpkin for a Gourd Time

Knock, knock.\ Who’s there? \ Pumpkin.\ Pumpkin who?\ Pumpkin’ up the volume, this Halloween party’s about to get started!
Knock, knock.\ Who’s there? \ Pumpkin.\ Pumpkin who?\ Pumpkin pie and call it a night, I’m exhausted from carving jack-o’-lanterns!
Knock, knock.\ Who’s there?\ Howard.\ Howard who?\ Howard you like to be a pumpkin for Halloween? You’d have a smashing time!
Knock, knock.\ Who’s there?\ Harry.\ Harry who?\ Harry up, the pumpkin patch closes soon!
Knock, knock.\ Who’s there?\ Cantaloupe.\ Cantaloupe who?\ Cantaloupe with me to the pumpkin patch, it’s gonna be gourd-geous!
Knock knock.\ Who’s there?\ Jack.\ Jack who? Jack-o’-lantern wishes you a Happy Halloween!
Knock, knock.\ Who’s there?\ Spice.\ Spice who?\ Spice, spice baby, it’s pumpkin spice latte season!
Knock, knock.\ Who’s there?\ Phillip.\ Phillip who?\ Phillip my cup with more pumpkin spice latte, please!
Knock, knock.\ Who’s there?\ Wendy.\ Wendy who?\ Wendy did you say you were going to the pumpkin patch? I want to go too!
Knock, knock.\ Who’s there?\ Eileen.\ Eileen who?\ Eileen towards the pumpkin spice latte, I can’t resist!
Knock, knock.\ Who’s there?\ Don.\ Don who?\ Don’t be a scaredy-cat, it’s just a jack-o’-lantern!
Knock, knock.\ Who’s there?\ Lettuce.\ Lettuce who?\ Lettuce in! It’s cold out here and I need to warm up with some pumpkin soup!
Knock, knock.\ Who’s there?\ Noah.\ Noah who?\ Noah good place to get pumpkin carving supplies?
Knock, knock. \ Who’s there?\ Alpaca.\ Alpaca who? Alpaca the car, you drive us to the pumpkin patch!
Knock, knock.\ Who’s there?\ Cider.\ Cider who?\ Cider what? Cider what I see over there? A whole patch of pumpkins!
Knock, knock.\ Who’s there?\ Boo.\ Boo who?\ Don’t cry, there’s plenty of pumpkin pie to go around!