105+ Purple Jokes & Puns: You Won’t Be Blue After Reading!
Get ready to laugh your pants… purple! That’s right, we’ve compiled the best list of purple puns and violet jokes this side of the rainbow. Why is purple historically associated with royalty? Because these jokes are regally funny! From clever wordplay to positively hilarious punchlines, this collection of humor is sure to entertain. So, buckle up and prepare for some serious laughter – you’re about to experience the world’s funniest shade of humor.
Top Purple Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks: Guaranteed to Make You Lilac
- What’s a grape’s favorite music? Deep Purple.
- Feeling grapeful for this beautiful purple day!
- Don’t be a violet; be the purple you want to see in the world.
- Just saw a purple cow steal a car! It was udder chaos.
- What did the color purple say to the color pink? You’ve been fuchsia-ing with me!
- Purple’s favorite flavor? Grape.
- What’s a king’s favorite type of grape? A royal purple one.
- Purple rain? More like purple reign!
- I used to be afraid of the dark, then I saw the light purple.
- Having a grape day keeps the doctor away!
- Purple is my spirit color – always grapeful, never blue.
- What do you call a purple cow that meditates? Aware-grape.
- Feeling stressed? Just breathe and think grape thoughts.
- Excuse me, is this grape juice purple, or am I seeing things?
- Purple prose: when your writing is so good, it’s grape!
- Life is too short to be anything but purple and happy!
Funny Purple One-Liner Jokes To Make You Violet With Laughter
- I tried to join the Purple People Eaters fan club, but they said I wasn’t metal enough.
- My friend said he wanted to dye his hair the most silent color…so I suggested purple.
- Just saw a ghost writer trying to sign a contract. He was using disappearing ink – it was a real purple pen problem!
- Tried to explain to a grape that he looked a little green… he went purple with rage.
- Feeling kinda blue? Just add some red and you’ll be feeling purple in no time.
- Why did the purple crayon get sent to the principal’s office? He was caught drawing outside the lines!
- My friend said purple is the color of royalty. I guess that makes me a grape king.
- You know you’re addicted to purple when you start calling your favorite song your “theme mauve”.
- Some people say purple is a really “grape” color…I think that’s a bit of a stretch.
- What do you call a cow that’s really good at magic? A purple-moo-dinary magician!
- I told my friend his new sweater was very “you.” He said, “Thanks, I picked it out my-grape-self! “
- What happens when two violets have a fight? It’s an ultra-violent argument.
- How do you fix a cracked pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch. How do you fix a heart broken by a cracked pumpkin? With a purple patch, of course!
- Dating a musician is cool and all until you have to fight over what’s considered a “shade” of purple.
- What’s Prince’s favorite kind of lemonade? Purple-made.
QnA Jokes & Puns about Purple: Violets are Blue, Get Ready to Laugh Too
- Q: Why did the purple flower get an award? A: For being outstanding in its field! 🍇😂
- Q: What did the grape say when it got stepped on? A: Nothing, it just let out a little wine! 🍷🦶
- Q: Why is the color purple so bad at sneaking around? A: Because it’s always easy to spot a hue! 👀🤫
- Q: What do you call a cow that gives purple milk? A: A grape mistake! 🐮🥛🍇
- Q: What did the purple crayon say to the yellow crayon? A: Looks like you’ve got a bright future ahead of you! 🌈🖍️
- Q: What’s purple and loves to swim? A: A grape-fish! (Get it? Grape-fish!?) 🐠🍇
- Q: Why don’t aliens abduct clowns? A: Because they suspect it might be a setup! 👽🤡
- Q: What’s purple, flies, and gives milk? A: A milk-shake delivering butterfly! 🦋🥤
- Q: What does a queen say when she burps? A: “Excuse me, that was my royal grape-ness!” 👑💨
- Q: What’s purple and dangerous at sea? A: A piraña plant wearing floaties! 🪴🦈
- Q: Did you hear about the purple snake that escaped from prison? A: It was on the run but they caught it – turns out it was easy to track down because they were following its trail of violet crimes! 🐍🚓
- Q: What do you get if you cross a blueberry and a lemon? A: A berry sour look from both of them! 🍋🫐😠
- Q: Why did the purple shirt get sent to the principal’s office? A: For being indigo-nant! 👚🤨
- Q: Why did the artist decide to use the color purple? A: They were feeling grape-ly inspired! 🎨🍇
- Q: If a blueberry and a raspberry had a race, who would win? A: The raspberry! Because it’s a-head! 🫐🏃♂️💨
- Q: Why is grape juice so good at keeping secrets? A: Because it’s full of hush-berries! 😉🤫🍇
Dad Jokes about Purple: They’re Grape!
- Why did the purple grape get in trouble at school? He was caught making grape-ful noises during quiet time.
- What does a royal ghost like to wear? A purp-atory robe! 👻
- How do you know a color is really, really serious? It’s dead-icated to being purple.
- My wife asked me to pick up some purple shampoo… Guess she wants me to dye-gest some errands.
- I used to work in a purple tie factory… Let’s just say it wasn’t a knotty job. 👔
- Did you hear about the purple monster who won an award? He was so grape-ful.
- What does a purple flower use to clean their petals? A shrink-violet. 🌼
- Why did the blueberry blush? Because it saw the salad dressing!
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo? A pouch potato! (What, did you think it was gonna be purple-themed?)
- Where do grapes go to have a good time? A grape-a-licious rave!
- My friend says purple is his favorite color… Personally, I think he’s just plum crazy! 🤪
- What’s a painter’s favorite fruit? A purple-simmon, of course! 🎨
- I tried to make purple juice… but I think I added too much red… it’s beet-rooting me now!
- Why are grapes always invited to parties? Because they’re so grape-ular!
- What’s purple and conquered the world? Alexander the Grape! 🍇 🌎
Funny Quotes and Captions about Purple That Will Make You Laugh
- Life is too short for boring colors. Embrace your inner grape and go purple! 🍇
- I’m not saying I’m obsessed with purple, but I did name my car “The Amethyst” and my goldfish “Lavender.” 💜
- Feeling stressed? Just breathe and imagine you’re a majestic purple mountain. Unmovable, majestic…and slightly chilly. 🏔️
- Roses are red, violets are blue…wait. Scratch that. Everything’s purple today! 🌹
- You can’t tell me what to do, you’re not my favorite shade of purple! 💅
- Warning: Side effects of excessive purple exposure may include increased happiness, a sudden urge to wear velvet, and an uncontrollable craving for grape soda. 🥤
- Always trust a person with a purple door. They’re clearly creative, a little bit quirky, and probably have excellent taste in snacks. 🚪
- Some days you’re a vibrant violet, other days you’re a moody mauve. That’s life, baby. Embrace the color spectrum! 🌈
- My therapist told me to channel my inner peace. Turns out, it’s a very chatty shade of lavender with a penchant for disco music. 🧘♀️
- Just saw a dog dyed purple. I guess you could say it was a…ruff day for him? 🐶
- I purple you. It’s like “I love you” but with 100% more royalty and a hint of mystery.👑
- Did you hear about the purple cow who wrote poetry? He was really good at moo-ving people with his words. 🐄
- I’m not sure what’s more impressive, the fact that I managed to get grape juice out of my white shirt, or that I did it while wearing this fabulous purple hat.🎩
- Don’t be a hater, appreciate the lavender! 🌾
- Life is too short to wear boring underwear. Go for purple, you never know who you might impress (especially if you’re at the doctor’s office). 😉
- Me trying to explain to my dog that no, he can’t eat the purple crayon, even if it smells “deliciously like grapes”: a memoir. 🖍️
- They say money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy purple things. And honestly, that’s pretty much the same thing.🛍️
Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Purple: A Hue-morous Take
- A penny saved is a penny… well, it’s still pretty dull compared to a purple gemstone!
- Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy, and… likely to see a beautiful purple sunrise!
- Don’t judge a book by its cover, unless the cover is purple. Then it’s probably awesome.
- Where there’s a will, there’s a way… to dye everything you own purple!
- You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it wear a purple hat… without a lot of neigh-sayers.
- An apple a day keeps the doctor away… unless it’s a purple apple. Those are just weird.
- A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush… especially if the bird in your hand is a rare purple finch.
- Rome wasn’t built in a day… because they hadn’t discovered the efficiency of purple power tools yet.
- All that glitters is not gold… sometimes it’s purple and way more fabulous.
- Don’t count your chickens before they hatch… unless you’re breeding them for their purple feathers, then by all means, start counting!
- Two wrongs don’t make a right… but two scoops of grape ice cream make a deliciously purple treat.
- You can’t have your cake and eat it too… unless your cake is purple, in which case, you absolutely should have it all!
- The grass is always greener on the other side… especially if the other side is a field of purple lavender.
- A stitch in time saves nine… unless you’re talking about ripped purple jeans, then embrace the distressed look.
- Curiosity killed the cat… but satisfaction brought it back wearing a stylish purple hat.
Purple Double Entendres Puns: Jokes in Violet Humor
- “I’m really feeling my purple today!” (Confident and a bit bruised.)
- “She’s got that purple passion.” (Intense…and maybe prone to leaving hickeys.)
- “He walked in with a purple air about him.” (Important…and maybe holding his breath after a workout.)
- “Don’t go there, it’s a purple subject.” (Taboo…and maybe involves grape juice stains.)
- “They’re in a very purple relationship.” (Passionate…and covered in permanent marker doodles.)
- “He’s got a purple sense of humor.” (Naughty…and enjoys a good grape soda shower prank.)
- “She’s the purple elephant in the room.” (Unignorable…and maybe just escaped from a paint fight.)
- “This party is totally purple!” (Wild…and likely involving cheap wine.)
- “I’m just trying to keep my love life out of the purple.” (Private…and avoiding plum jam-related incidents.)
- “He’s got a purple thumb, that one.” (Great gardener…or terrible at opening grape juice bottles.)
- “She wrote me a very purple letter.” (Passionate…and possibly using a leaky fountain pen.)
- “That’s a very purple suggestion.” (Scandalous…and perhaps involves blueberries in a compromising situation.)
- “He’s got a purple temper.” (Fiery…and prone to turning beet red when angry.)
- “The truth is somewhere in the purple.” (Hidden…and probably under a pile of dirty laundry, stained violet of course.)
- “She’s got a real purple touch.” (Talented…or really bad at washing off blueberry pie filling.)
- “That’s one purple secret you’ve got there.” (Juicy…and might explain the grape-stained furniture.)
Funny Purple Tom Swifties: A Violet You’ll Read Again
- “That painting needs more red and blue,” Tom said purpley.
- “I’m feeling quite regal today,” Tom declared purplely.
- “The Vikings are my favorite football team,” Tom cheered purplely.
- “This jam tastes like grapes,” Tom said preservingly.
- “My favorite dinosaur is the Barney,” Tom said purplely.
- “That amethyst is stunning!” Tom exclaimed gemstonely.
- “I think I’ll have another glass of wine,” Tom said merlotly.
- “This lavender scent is so calming,” Tom said aromatically.
- “I really messed up that magic trick,” Tom admitted blunderingly.
- “This bruise is starting to look nasty,” Tom winced painfully.
- “This plum is perfectly ripe,” Tom declared succulently.
- “This opera singer has incredible range,” Tom remarked operatically.
- “I love Jimi Hendrix’s music,” Tom said expertly.
- “That’s Prince’s signature symbol,” Tom said iconically.
- “This taro bubble tea is delicious!” Tom exclaimed Taiwanesely.
- “I stained my shirt with ink,” Tom said regretfully.
Knock-knock Jokes about Purple: A Violet You’ll Love
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Violet. Violet who? Violet you bring me some grape juice? I’m feeling purple-thirsty!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Amethyst. Amethyst who? Amethyst-taking how much you love purple!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Plum. Plum who? Plum forgot what I was going to say… guess my memory’s gone purple-mented!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Plum. Plum who? Plum delighted to see you’re still laughing!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Heather. Heather who? Heather you heard the one about the purple cow? Never mind, it’s udder-ly ridiculous!
