Shirt Happens: 230+ Jokes & Puns to Wear with Style

funny Shirt jokes with one liner clever Shirt puns at PunnyFunny.com

Are you ready to laugh your sleeves off? Look no further, because we’ve hand-picked the best shirt jokes and puns that are guaranteed to make you crack a smile. From clever wordplay to hilarious one-liners, this list of shirt humor is perfect for kids (and adults with a good sense of humor). So go ahead, loosen your collar and get ready for a positive overload of humor – because these shirt jokes will have you rolling on the floor with laughter!

Shirt-ly Funny: Our Top Picks for Hilarious ‘Shirt’ Puns & Jokes!

  1. “What does a shirt say when it’s feeling down? I’m feeling unbuttoned!”
  2. “Why did the t-shirt go to therapy? It had some deep-seated wrinkles to work through.”
  3. “What do you call a shirt that’s always causing trouble? A button-pusher.”
  4. “Why did the shirt go to the gym? To get more abs-olutely fabulous!”
  5. “What did the shirt say when it got a hole? ‘That’s just a tearable situation.'”
  6. “Why did the shirt get arrested? It was caught loitering without a collar.”
  7. “What do you call a shirt that’s always on the go? A traveling t-shirt.”
  8. “Why couldn’t the shirt go on vacation? It was all out of travel-sleeve allowance.”
  9. “What did the shirt say when it got a stain? ‘This is just my tie-dyin’ inside.'”
  10. “What did the shirt say when it won the lottery? ‘I’m going on a clothes shopping spree!'”
  11. “Why was the shirt rejected by its crush? It just couldn’t get a button to click.”
  12. “What’s a shirt’s favorite dessert? Button-up cake.”
  13. “Why did the shirt break up with its significant other? The relationship just wasn’t iron-clad.”
  14. “What do you call a shirt that’s always causing drama? A button fly on the wall.”
  15. “Why did the shirt feel underdressed at the party? It couldn’t find its tietiquette.”
  16. “What did the shirt say to the pants? ‘I’ve got you covered, bro.'”
  17. “What’s a shirt’s favorite game? Button-up, of course!”
  18. “Why did the shirt feel insecure? It just couldn’t seem to cuff up.”
  19. “What did the shirt say when it got a compliment? ‘Aww, shucks. I’m blushing fabric-ciously.'”
  20. “Why did the shirt go to the doctor? It was feeling a little unbuttoned.”

Get Your Daily Dose of Laughter with our ‘Funny Shirt’ One-Liner Jokes!

  1. I got a shirt with a picture of a shirt on it, but it was too shirt for me to wear.
  2. The shirt was so soft, it felt like I was wearing a cloud, but then I realized it was just a cotton poly blend.
  3. I tried to buy a shirt with my favorite dad joke on it, but they were all dad cults.
  4. My friend’s shirt said “I’m with stupid” with an arrow pointing up, but he was wearing it backwards.
  5. I saw someone wearing a shirt that said “Property of NASA,” and now I understand why space is so expensive.
  6. I found a shirt that reads “Don’t drink the water” in every language except Russian.
  7. My “I hate Mondays” shirt doesn’t work on Tuesdays either.
  8. I bought a “Caution: Contents Under Pressure” shirt, but my mom said I had to take it off before I exploded.
  9. I saw a guy wearing a shirt that said “I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right,” and he was arguing about it.
  10. The “World’s Best Lawyer” shirt was the perfect gift for my friend who can never make a decision.
  11. Every time I wear my “I’m with awkward” shirt, I end up standing next to my ex.
  12. My “Lose weight, ask me how” shirt is getting tight, maybe I should stop eating while wearing it.
  13. I got a new shirt with a picture of a pickle on it, it’s kind of a big dill.
  14. My “It’s not delivery, it’s DiGiorno” shirt didn’t impress my date at the Italian restaurant.
  15. I saw a guy wearing a shirt that said “I’m not lazy, I’m just energy efficient,” and I’m starting to see the appeal.
  16. My “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good” shirt is my go-to for family reunions.
  17. I tried to surprise my wife with a shirt that had a picture of her favorite flower, but it was a lily bit too small.
  18. I saw a shirt with the phrase “I’m the black sheep of the family,” but it was white.
  19. The “I don’t discriminate, I hate everyone” shirt speaks to my soul.
  20. I wanted a shirt that said “I run on coffee and sarcasm,” but all they had was a “decaf and dad jokes” option.

QnA Jokes & Puns: Taking a Stab at Humor with ‘Shirt’ly Puns

  1. Why did the shirt go on a diet? Because it wanted to button up.
  2. How does a shirt get rid of wrinkles? By hanging out with a dryer.
  3. What did the shirt say to the pants? Button it up, we’re in this together!
  4. Why did the shirt cross the road? To get to the laundromat.
  5. How many buttons does it take to close a shirt? None, if you use a zipper.
  6. What do you call a shirt that’s also a superhero? A cape-tivating shirt.
  7. How can you tell if a shirt is shy? It never buttons up.
  8. Why did the shirt go to the doctor? It had a button allergy.
  9. What did the shirt say when it won an award? I’m so flattered, I’m literally buttoned up.
  10. How do you make a shirt smile? Put a couple of buttons on it.
  11. What do you call a shirt that’s always on time? Punct-tee-al.
  12. Why did the shirt refuse to go skydiving? It was afraid of collar space.
  13. How many buttons does it take to start a fashion revolution? Just one.
  14. What did one shirt say to the other? “I’ve gotta hand it to you, you’re looking sharp today.”
  15. Why did the shirt need therapy? It had too many buttons to deal with.
  16. What do you call a shirt that can’t keep a secret? A blabber-button.
  17. Why did the shirt feel lonely? It was a lone-sleeved shirt.
  18. How does a shirt greet its friends? With open arms… er, sleeves.
  19. What’s a shirt’s favorite type of music? Buttoned-up pop.
  20. Why did the shirt go into a cocoon? It wanted to come out as a button-fly butterfly.

From Hilarious to T-Shirt-al: Dad Jokes about Shirts

  1. Why did the shirt go to the bar? To get a round collar!
  2. What do you call a shirt that’s always cold? A button-up!
  3. How does a shirt greet its friends? With a sleeve-der hug!
  4. What’s a shirt’s favorite type of music? Poplin!
  5. Why do shirts make good detectives? They have collars for clues!
  6. Why did the shirt go to the doctor? It was feeling unbuttoned!
  7. How does a shirt decorate for Christmas? With a holly collar!
  8. What did the shirt say to the iron? Don’t worry, I’ll press on!
  9. Why did the shirt and pants break up? They couldn’t button things up!
  10. How does a shirt like its coffee? Decollated!
  11. Why was the shirt embarrassed at the party? It was the only one wearing a t-shirt!
  12. How does a shirt get to work? It buttons up and takes the coat-tie!
  13. What’s a shirt’s favorite type of board game? Button, Button, Who’s Got the Button?
  14. Why did the shirt go on strike? It couldn’t handle any more ironing demands!
  15. How does a shirt like its eggs? Overeasy on the c-collar!
  16. What’s a shirt’s favorite workout? Button-ups!
  17. Why did the shirt refuse to change? It liked itself just the way it was!
  18. How does a shirt apologize? It curties!
  19. Why did the shirt get in trouble at school? It was caught with its tag showing!
  20. How does a shirt send a message? Through its c-palm!

Laugh Your Way into Style: Funny Quotes about Shirts

  1. “I have a closet full of shirts, but I still wear the same three over and over again. Fashionable or lazy? You decide.”
  2. “I don’t always wear a shirt, but when I do, it’s usually backwards.”
  3. “You know you’re an adult when you’re excited about getting a new shirt for your birthday.”
  4. “I wear my heart on my sleeve, and my food stains on my shirt.”
  5. “My shirts seem to have a magnetic attraction to spaghetti sauce.”
  6. “Wearing a shirt with a pocket is like having your very own kangaroo pouch.”
  7. “I have a strict ‘one shirt per day’ policy, unless there’s a spill or an armpit emergency.”
  8. “Shirts with sequins are like flirtation enablers. Don’t wear one unless you’re ready to be hit on.”
  9. “Nothing says ‘adulting’ like buying a quality shirt just for work meetings.”
  10. “I wish my shirt had a built-in straw, so I could casually sip my drink without having to lift it.”
  11. “Is it just me, or does every workout shirt feel more like a punishment than motivation?”
  12. “Ladies, the key to a man’s heart is through his laundry. Fold his shirts and you have him forever.”
  13. “The laundry pile is a never-ending cycle of shirts trying to escape.”
  14. “I feel like my shirt is trying to tell me something with its lack of buttons.”
  15. “Forget ‘Netflix and Chill,’ I’m all about ‘Sweatpants and Oversized Shirts.'”
  16. “My shirts might be wrinkled, but at least I ironed out my attitude.”
  17. “A shirt that says ‘I woke up like this’ usually means I woke up four hours early to look this good.”
  18. “Why wear a plain shirt when I can have one with my face all over it? #selfpromotion”
  19. “My dry cleaner knows my shirts better than my therapist.”
  20. “I would love to wear a shirt with a witty quote, but I don’t trust myself not to spill something on it.”

Chuckling at Chafing: Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Shirts

  1. A clean shirt is a sign of a dirty mind, but a dirty shirt is just a sign of a busy schedule.
  2. You can’t make an omelette without breaking a few buttons.
  3. A wrinkle in your shirt is a wrinkle in your day.
  4. The grass is always greener on the collared side.
  5. A shirt is like a mullet – business in the front, party in the back.
  6. Don’t cry over a stained shirt, just perform a tie-dye miracle.
  7. A shirt without wrinkles is a shirt without character.
  8. The early bird gets the best selection of shirts at the thrift store.
  9. A shirt on your back is worth two in the hamper.
  10. Good things come to those who iron their own clothes.
  11. A shirt can be tight without being wrong.
  12. You can’t judge a man by his shirt, but you can judge him by how long he’s willing to wear it.
  13. A shirt can hide a multitude of spilled food.
  14. You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him wear a shirt.
  15. A good shirt can be the key to a great first impression – or it could be the reason for a last impression.
  16. When life gives you laundry, make sure your shirt is inside out.
  17. The best things in life are free – but a good shirt will still cost you.
  18. You can never have too many shirts, said no one who’s ever done laundry.
  19. A wrinkle today is a headache tomorrow when you have to iron it out.
  20. It’s not the shirt that makes the man, it’s the man who chooses to dress like a lumberjack on casual Friday.

Shake up Your Wardrobe with These Shirt-tastic Double Entendres Puns

  1. “I wear the pants, but you can wear my shirt.”
  2. “Sorry, I can’t come to the phone right now. I’m in a shirt pile.”
  3. “I’m not just a pretty face, I come with a shirt too.”
  4. “I’m not arguing, I’m just helping you take your shirt off.”
  5. “I like my shirts like I like my coffee…strong and always on my chest.”
  6. “I may not be a genie, but I can make your shirt disappear.”
  7. “I’m a shirt connoisseur…I have one for every occasion.”
  8. “I like my shirts how I like my humor…dry and straight to the point.”
  9. “I didn’t choose the shirt life, the shirt life chose me.”
  10. “My shirt game is strong, just like my coffee.”
  11. “I don’t always wear a shirt, but when I do, it’s usually on backwards.”
  12. “I may not have a six-pack, but at least my shirt does.”
  13. “Shirts and tacos are a lot alike…they both come in soft or crunchy.”
  14. “I may not have my life together, but at least my shirt is on right-side out.”
  15. “I’m not saying I’m Batman, but have you ever seen me and Batman wearing the same shirt?”
  16. “My shirt may say ‘Netflix and chill’, but I actually just want to watch TV and eat pizza.”
  17. “My shirt may be wrinkled, but my sense of humor is always ironed.”
  18. “My shirt may have holes in it, but that just means it’s well-loved.”
  19. “I always wear my heart on my sleeve…and a funny slogan on my shirt.”
  20. “My shirt may be plain white, but my personality is anything but boring.”

Get the Latest Fashion Sense – Recursive Puns about Shirts!

  1. What did the tailor say when he saw the endless pile of dirty shirts? “Looks like I’ve got my work cut out for me-shirting!”
  2. Why did the shirt go to therapy? Because it had too many unresolved pre-collar issues.
  3. I once had a shirt made out of recycled materials, but it kept repeating the same joke over and over again. It was a rep-tee-tive shirt.
  4. If a shirt is too big for you, is it considered a grand-shirt?
  5. My friend told me I should take off my shirt because I was turning into a philosopher. I replied, “But if I take off my shirt, then I’ll be ‘shirtless’!”
  6. What do you call a shirt that’s also a fashion guru? A trend-setter!
  7. I tried to make an origami shirt, but it was a flop-fold!
  8. I asked my shirt why it always looks so creased. It said, “I have no idea, I’m just trying to iron out my issues.”
  9. What do you call a shirt that’s always late? A procrastin-shirt!
  10. I told my shirt a joke, but it didn’t laugh. It said it’s seen it a million times before.
  11. Why did the shirt go to the doctor? Because it had a case of unbuttoned-buttonitis.
  12. The tailor was on a roll and started making shirts with jokes printed on them. You could say he had a pun-dominated market.
  13. What do you call a shirt that likes to party? A wild-shirt!
  14. I tried to iron my shirt, but it kept making up excuses. I guess it just hates to be pressed for time!
  15. Did you hear about the shirt that won a game of chess? It was a check-mate tee!
  16. My dad always wears Hawaiian shirts. I guess you could say he’s plaid-shirted for life.
  17. Why was the shirt afraid of commitment? Because it couldn’t handle the collar-cuffing!
  18. I never trust my shirt’s measurements. It’s been known to stretch the truth.
  19. I asked my shirt what its favorite food was. It said “p-tee-zer pizza”!
  20. The tailor had to close his business because his employees kept making shady deals under-the-table-shirt!

Life’s Too Short for Plain Shirts, Tom Swifties.

  1. “I can’t believe I accidentally shrunk my ‘shirt’,” said Tom, fittingly.
  2. “This ‘shirt’ really brings out the stripes in my personality,” Tom attested.
  3. “I stole this ‘shirt’ from my brother,” Tom confessed, forcibly.
  4. “I feel so underdressed in this plain ‘shirt’,” Tom pretended, ironically.
  5. “I only wear nerdy ‘shirts’,” Tom reasoned intellectually.
  6. “I’m never taking off this ‘shirt’,” Tom insisted, adamantly.
  7. “I traded my favorite ‘shirt’ for a sandwich,” Tom joked, cheesily.
  8. “I can’t wear this ‘shirt’ again, it’s just too fa-fa-fa flashy,” Tom stuttered.
  9. “I feel like a million bucks in this designer ‘shirt’,” Tom bragged, financially.
  10. “My ‘shirt’ is perfect for all occasions,” Tom boasted, fittingly.
  11. “I spilled ketchup on my white ‘shirt’,” Tom admitted, unapologetically.
  12. “I love my ‘shirt’ collection, it’s my pride and apparel,” Tom punned.
  13. “I’ll take this ‘shirt’ to the grave,” Tom declared, dramatically.
  14. “I’m not feeling very shirt-ical today,” Tom moaned, sartorially.
  15. “I always wear an undershirt, just to be on the safe ‘shirt’,” Tom quipped.
  16. “This ‘shirt’ makes me look buff,” Tom flexed, delusionally.
  17. “I’m the king of the t-shirts,” Tom bragged, royally.
  18. “This ‘shirt’ brings out the green in my eyes,” Tom pointed out, colorfully.
  19. “I’m a man of few words and many ‘shirts’,” Tom stated, succinctly.
  20. “I can’t wear this ‘shirt’ in public, I’ll be the butt of everyone’s jokes,” Tom joked, cheekily.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirts who? Shirts you glad I didn’t say banana?

  1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt is getting stretched out from all these knock-knock jokes!
  2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt happens when you accidentally shrink your favorite t-shirt in the dryer.
  3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt if you’re sure you want to hear another knock-knock joke!
  4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-pocket change for a funny guy like me!
  5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-ing is caring, so here’s another joke for you!
  6. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-stains are a fashion statement, right?
  7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-ly you’re not tired of these jokes yet!
  8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt I know this is a funny joke, but let’s not get buttoned up over it.
  9. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-usly, if you don’t laugh at this one, I’ll feel like a real-tee.
  10. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-ion me, I think I’ve heard this one before.
  11. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-al defeat if you don’t admit that was a good one.
  12. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-ainly not wearing a shirt is the best way to do laundry.
  13. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-ainly not leaving the house without my lucky shirt!
  14. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt I be telling these jokes if they weren’t funny?
  15. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-abulous, now let’s keep this joke streak going!
  16. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-astic day to brighten someone’s mood with a joke!
  17. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-and-sandwich is my favorite lunch, but shirt-and-pants is a fashion disaster.
  18. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-come, let’s share a good laugh over this joke.
  19. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-tainly not forgetting to put on my lucky shirt on game day!
  20. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shirt. Shirt who? Shirt-titude is everything, so let’s have a positive outlook on life and tell more jokes!

Shirting the Issue: Hilarious Malapropisms for Fashion Faux Pas!

  1. “I got this new sleep ‘shirt’ at the store yesterday, it’s so comfortable!”
  2. “Did you see that guy’s ‘shirtbulance’ costume? Hilarious!”
  3. “Sorry, I can’t hear you over the loud ‘shirtles’ fan.”
  4. “I accidentally got mustard on my Sunday ‘shirt’ while eating hot dogs at the game.”
  5. “I can’t believe I forgot to pack my swim ‘shirt’ for the beach trip.”
  6. “I saw a ‘shirthouse’ sale downtown, we have to go!”
  7. “I can’t decide which ‘shirtmark’ to wear to the party tonight.”
  8. “Did you see those new ‘shirttails’ at the designer store? They’re so trendy.”
  9. “I spilled coffee on my favorite ‘shirtlettuce’ this morning, so frustrating!”
  10. “I think your ‘shirtbridge’ is too low-cut for the office, maybe wear a camisole underneath.”
  11. “I’m going to the gym, gotta make sure my ‘shirthands’ are ready for that workout!”
  12. “The wedding theme is white ‘shirtcasual,’ what does that even mean?”
  13. “My mom always used to say, ‘cleanliness is next to ‘shirtliness’.”
  14. “Do you like my new ‘shirtmit’? I think it’s a perfect autumn color.”
  15. “I can’t believe he’s wearing a Hawaiian ‘shirthole’ to a job interview.”
  16. “Why are you wearing a ‘shirthammer’ to bed? It’s freezing!”
  17. “I may be single, but I have a whole closet full of ‘shirtrage’.”
  18. “I’m so excited for the ‘shirtacious’ concert next week, it’s going to be epic!”
  19. “I got these adorable ‘shirtmuffins’ for my daughter, they’re so cute.”
  20. “I tried to iron my ‘shirtdrobe,’ but I accidentally burned a hole in it.”

Switching Stripes: Spoonerisms about Shirts

  1. “Sharty Dirt”
  2. “Hurt Shackle”
  3. “Dirty Shirties”
  4. “Skirt Hirt”
  5. “Shorty Drip”
  6. “Turtle Shit”
  7. “Firty Skirt”
  8. “Shiny Dirt”
  9. “Shitty Dart”
  10. “Girly Shirt”
  11. “Bird Shite”
  12. “Mirthy Skirt”
  13. “Shirky Dite”
  14. “Cheeky Skirt”
  15. “Squirmy Shirt”
  16. “Dusty Shart”
  17. “Throbbing Shirt”
  18. “Flirty Skirt”
  19. “Shitty Short”
  20. “Sweaty Shirt”

Buttoning Up: The Finest Shirt Puns!

Well folks, that’s a wrap on our collection of shirt puns! We hope you enjoyed our play on words and had a good chuckle along the way. And if you’re still craving more jokes, why not check out our other pun and joke posts? We guarantee they’ll have you giggling like a schoolgirl in no time. Thanks for reading and remember, always wear your punny-est shirt with pride!

Jami Ch., the enthusiastic owner and operator of PunnyFunny.com

PunnyFunny Team

I'm Jami Ch., the enthusiastic owner and operator of PunnyFunny.com, where I and my team share the best puns and jokes with the world. My passion for original humor drives me to create content that keeps everyone smiling. As a dedicated humorist, I've made PunnyFunny.com a haven for those who love a good laugh, just like me. Explore my Best Puns & Jokes collection.

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