Dive into Laughter: 230+ Swimming Jokes & Puns!
Welcome to the Best List of Swimming Jokes and Puns for Kids! Get ready to dive into a sea of clever and positive humor that will have you swimming in laughter. We’ve compiled a list of hilarious jokes about swimming that will make a splash with anyone who loves to get their feet wet. From pool puns to jokes about goggles, these funny one-liners are guaranteed to make a splash. So put on your swim cap and get ready to giggle your way through this swimming joke pool.
Making a Splash: Swimming Puns & Jokes for a Good Laugh – Editor’s Picks
- “Why did the swimmer refuse to wear a Speedo? Because he was afraid it would slow him down!”
- “What do swimmers wear to keep warm in the pool? A swim-moo-moo!”
- “Did you hear about the stolen goggles? The police are looking for a guy with a really clear vision.”
- “Why did the lifeguard kick the elephants out of the pool? They kept dropping their trunks!”
- “What did the swimmer say when she dove into a pool of Jello? This is some serious swimmage!”
- “Why do mermaids always swim in saltwater? Because pepper water makes them sneeze!”
- “What do you call a fish that can swim faster than light? A super-caudal-istic-expi-swim-aladosious!”
- “Why did the swimmer refuse to compete in the butterfly stroke? He didn’t want to look like a caterpillar!”
- “Did you hear about the Olympic swimmer who was always cold? She couldn’t deal with the freestyle!”
- “Why don’t swimming pools have windows? Because they like to keep it under cover!”
- “What did the swimmer’s hat say to his goggles? You keep an eye out, I’ll keep a lid on things!”
- “Why do dolphins swim in circles? Because they’re trying to catch their own tail!”
- “What did the fish say when he hit the wall? Dam!”
- “Why are dolphins so smart? Because they’re always swapping tails with each other!”
- “What does a bikini say to a Speedo? Hey, we have a lot in common – we both show off our assets!”
- “Why did the swimmer refuse to do a backstroke? Because he didn’t want to get water in his ears!”
- “What did the swim coach say to his team before a big meet? Remember to stay in your lanes and don’t be koi!”
- “Why did the lifeguard go to art school? He wanted to learn how to sketch a perfect dive!”
- “What do you get when you mix a swimmer with a tree? A pool branch!”
- “Why did the swimmer bring a mop to her race? In case she made a splash!”

Dive into Laughter with These Hilarious Swimming One-Liners!
- Why was the swimmer so tired? Because he was all wet.
- I’m convinced that swimming is just a clever way of dancing in water.
- The only time I don’t feel like drowning is when I’m swimming.
- How do fish stay in shape? They do fin-ternational swimming.
- Swimmers never get old, they just become water-logged.
- What is a shark’s favorite stroke? The toothbrush stroke.
- Why did the swimmer refuse to wear a wetsuit? He didn’t want to be tide down.
- I’ve been swimming all day and I’m still not shore if I’m doing it right.
- The lifeguard told me to keep an eye on the pool, but it’s hard when the water keeps splashing in my face.
- Did you hear about the pool that had a diving board shaped like a giant ear? It was all ear if you want to swim.
- What did the swimmer say when he broke the speed record? It was reel fast.
- How do you recognize a professional swimmer? They’re always making waves.
- What do you call a race where everyone swims backwards? A reverse crawl.
- Why don’t killer whales eat swimmers? They prefer people who are on the whale side.
- Why did the man refuse to swim in the ocean? He was afraid of currents.
- What’s a mermaid’s favorite stroke? The flipper crawl.
- Why did the lifeguard go to school? To learn how to make waves.
- What do you call a swimmer who’s always cold? A chilly dip.
- What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Dam!
- Why do mermaids wear seashells? Because B-shells are too small and D-shells are too big.
QnA Jokes & Puns about Swimming: Making Waves of Laughter!
- Q: What do you call a fish who is afraid to swim? A: A chicken of the sea!
- Q: Why did the shark refuse to go to the public pool? A: He was afraid he would get fin-gerprints all over him!
- Q: How does a swimmer prepare for a big race? A: By doing a lot of pool-ups!
- Q: Why did the swimmer refuse to take a break during practice? A: Because he was afraid he would get waterlogged!
- Q: What did one wave say to the other? A: Nothing, they just waved!
- Q: Why was the swimmer always so good at freestyle? A: Because she was the breaststroke!
- Q: How do you know when a swimmer is lying? A: You can see right through their goggles!
- Q: What did the lifeguard say to the kids who were horsing around in the pool? A: “Neigh, there will be no horsing around on my watch!”
- Q: Why did the swimmer wear two pairs of goggles? A: In case one runs out of frames!
- Q: What do you call a swimming elephant? A: A trunk in the water!
- Q: Why did the swimmer bring a pencil to the pool? A: To take notes in the deep end!
- Q: What did the pool say to the swimmers when it started to rain? A: “Sorry, I’m feeling a little under the weather!”
- Q: How do mermaids keep their hair looking good while swimming? A: With a sea-salt spray, of course!
- Q: What did the swimmer say when he saw a shark? A: “FINally, some competition!”
- Q: Why did the chicken swim across the pool? A: To get to the other bok-bok-side!
- Q: What do you call a guilty swimmer? A: A pool-tely!
- Q: What did the fish say when it hit the wall of the tank? A: Dam!
- Q: What did the ocean say to the beach? A: Nothing, it just waved!
- Q: Why did the swimmer refuse to swim in the lake after dark? A: Because it was too hard to sea!
- Q: How do swimmers say goodbye? A: With a wave!
Dive into Hilarious Dad Jokes about Swimming!
- Did you hear about the swimmer who drowned in a bowl of soup? He was in over his head.
- I used to be a lifeguard at the pool, but I was fired for making too many waves.
- Why did the swimmer bring a clock to the pool? He wanted to swim back in time.
- I wanted to join a synchronized swimming team, but I couldn’t find a pool that was in sync with my schedule.
- Why did the lifeguard carry a pencil? In case there were any pool-tential accidents.
- I was going to tell a joke about the pool, but it’s a little too deep for you.
- What does a mermaid wear to math class? An algae-bra.
- Why did the bladder blush? Because it saw the ocean’s bottom.
- What do you call a wet teddy bear? A soak-a-toy.
- Why didn’t the lifeguard save the drowning hippie? He was too far out, man.
- I tried to make a joke about swimming, but it just didn’t float.
- Why did the swimmer decide to retire? He was tired of swimming against the current.
- What do you call it when a pool has a nervous breakdown? Chlorine-a-phobia.
- I attempted to break the world record for the longest distance swam by a man, but I couldn’t get over the water.
- Did you hear about the fish who failed math class? He liked to multiply by water.
- I recently started taking swimming lessons, but I’m just treading water at this point.
- What did the duck say after swimming in cold water? “I’m quack-ing up!”
- Why couldn’t the lifeguard save the hippie? Because he was too much of a free spirit.
- I swam so much yesterday, I think I have a swim-achache.
- If you ever feel lonely, just hop in the pool. You’ll find plenty of floaties.
Making a Splash: Hilarious Quotes about Swimming
- “Swimming is the closest thing to flight, without actually having to learn how to fly.”
- “You know you’re a swimmer when your hair smells like chlorine on a daily basis.”
- “I swim because punching people is frowned upon.”
- “The only thing better than a good swim is an empty lane.”
- “I have a love-hate relationship with swimming. I love it, and it hates me.”
- “Swimming: the only sport where taking a break involves breathing.”
- “If at first, you don’t succeed, try swimming. It’s a lot easier.”
- “Swimming: the most efficient way to get wet and tired at the same time.”
- “Swimming is like a low-budget movie. You never know how it’s going to end, and it usually involves a lot of pain.”
- “I’m not lazy; I’m just preserving my energy for a killer kick in my next race.”
- “Chocolate decreases stress, and so does swimming. Therefore, swimming is just like chocolate… but with less guilt.”
- Swimming is the best therapy for when life gets too deep to handle.
- “I don’t always swim, but when I do, I make sure to pee before I get in the pool.”
- “Chlorine is my perfume, and the pool deck is my runway.”
- “If I had a dollar for every time someone asked me why I swim, I’d be a millionaire… and probably too busy swimming to spend it.”
- “To swim or not to swim? That is not even a question.”
- “I don’t have an anger problem; I just need a good swim set to calm me down.”
- “The ocean is my happy place… mainly because there’s no one there to judge my swimming strokes.”
- “My swimming coach once told me I could achieve anything if I put my mind to it. So I decided to swim a mile in Jell-O, just because I could.”
- “I may not be the fastest swimmer, but I like to think that I make everyone else feel better about themselves.”
Making a Splash: Hilarious Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Swimming
- ) “A bad day at the pool beats a good day at the office.”
- ) “You can’t teach an old fish new strokes.”
- ) “Life is short, forget the beach body and just jump in the water.”
- ) “If at first you don’t succeed, try swimming instead.”
- ) “A clear pool is a happy pool, but a clear ocean is suspicious.”
- ) “Age is just a number, unless you’re trying to swim the laps of a toddler.”
- ) “A little chlorine never hurt nobody.”
- ) “Swimming: the best de-stresser that doesn’t involve alcohol.”
- ) “The only things that should be flopping around your swimsuit are your arms and legs.”
- ) “Just keep swimming, even if it’s in a kiddie pool.”
- ) “If life gives you lemons, make a pool and throw them in for a refreshing swim.”
- ) “Why do mermaids always have perfect hair? Because they never have to deal with swim caps.”
- ) “Swimming etiquette rule #1: no peeing in the pool.”
- ) “Swimming: the only sport where you can eat while you’re doing it.”
- ) “Jumping into a cold pool on a hot summer day is like being reborn, but without the hormones and stretch marks.”
- ) “If you’re feeling down, just remember there’s always a lifeguard watching you struggle.”
- ) “Forgetting your towel at the pool is a rookie mistake, but forgetting it at a nudist beach is just bad luck.”
- ) “Why walk on water when you can just float on your back and relax?”
- ) “Butterflies are beautiful creatures, unless you’re doing them in the pool.”
- ) “Swimming: the sport where wearing goggles makes you look cool instead of nerdy.”
Make a Splash with These Swimming Double Entendres Puns!
- “I’m not afraid to take the plunge, as long as it’s into a pool.”
- “I may not have perfect form, but I’ll still make a splash.”
- “You can call me the Michael Phelps of bed soaks.”
- “I may not be an Olympic swimmer, but I can still make a few laps.”
- “They say swimming is a great low-impact exercise, but my bathing suit disagrees.”
- “I may not be a lifeguard, but I’ll still give mouth to mouth.”
- “I’ll go the distance in the pool, but not in a relationship.”
- “Swimming laps is my cardio, but doing the backstroke is my happy place.”
- “My favorite type of stroke? The one that gets me to the swim-up bar.”
- “I may not be a fish, but I sure know how to make a splash.”
- “I don’t always swim, but when I do, I prefer the butterfly.”
- “They say chlorine is bad for your hair, but have you seen how cute swimmers look?”
- “Swimming naked is freeing and liberating, until someone yells ‘cannonball.'”
- “I may not have gills, but I definitely have a competitive spirit in the pool.”
- “Forget holding your breath underwater, I’ll take a breath mint instead.”
- “I may not look graceful while swimming, but at least I feel like a mermaid.”
- “I’ll take a dip in the pool over a dip in the stock market any day.”
- “They say to always swim with a buddy, but I’m my own best company.”
- “When life gets tough, just remember to keep calm and keep swimming.”
- “You know what they say, bigger pool, bigger cannonball.”
Give us a fin and we’ll make a splash with these recursive puns about swimming
- Why did the mermaid swim in a circle? She wanted to make a splash-pun.
- I wanted to learn how to swim like a pro, but I just kept going in circles. I guess you could say I’m a freestyle-pun swimmer.
- Did you hear about the fish that became a competitive swimmer? It was gill-oriented.
- What is a swimmer’s favorite type of music? Freestyle rap.
- I tried to teach my fish how to swim, but it just kept floundering.
- Why did the swimmer bring a ladder to the pool? In case they needed to take a lap-ladder.
- How did the penguin beat the professional swimmer in a race? It was a flip-per-pun.
- The swimming instructor couldn’t keep their students’ attention until they started telling dad-joke-disney swim puns. Now they have the little mermaids laughing and learning!
- Why was the swimmer feeling sad? They were in the deep end-depression.
- Did you hear about the ghost that loved to go swimming? It always had a good float-pun.
- What do you call a group of synchronized swimmers who also love puns? A school of thought-liners.
- How do you make a pool laugh? You make a big splash-joke.
- Where do fish go to learn how to swim? Finishing school.
- What did the water say to the swimmer? Keep making waves.
- I asked the lifeguard for a pun joke, and they told me to be sure not to drink and dive.
- What do you call a swimming competition between two pigs? A hog-swim race.
- The swimmers were always racing against time, but time was always making a splash.
- Where do sharks learn how to swim? At the f-ISHademy.
- Why did the gingerbread man refuse to go swimming? He was worried he’d get soggy.
- What do you get when you mix a swimmer and a plumber? A diving leak-pun.
Making a Splash with These Swimming Tom Swifties!
- ) “I can’t do a backstroke,” Tom floundered.
- ) “I’ll race you to the other side,” Tom plunged forward.
- ) “I just dove into the pool,” Tom did a cannonball.
- ) “I’m not a strong swimmer,” Tom treaded water.
- ) “I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed,” Tom said with a breaststroke.
- ) “Watch out for that deep end,” Tom warned poolly.
- ) “I hate swimming laps,” Tom whined.
- ) “I’ll be doing butterfly strokes,” Tom fluttered away.
- ) “I forgot my goggles,” Tom said with a blurry vision.
- ) “I never learned how to dive,” Tom chickened out.
- ) “I’ll use this kickboard to practice,” Tom said buoyantly.
- ) “This water is too cold,” Tom shivered.
- ) “I need to work on my flip turns,” Tom said while doing a belly flop.
- ) “I wish I could float like you,” Tom said to an innertuber.
- ) “I can hold my breath under water for a long time,” Tom boasted.
- ) “I’ll make a splashy entrance,” Tom said with a cannonball twist.
- ) “I’m getting wrinkles from being in the water too long,” Tom wrinkled his nose.
- ) “I like to swim in the nude,” Tom said bare-faced.
- ) “I’ll have to reschedule our swim date,” Tom said with a freestyle stroke.
- ) “I’m not afraid of sharks,” Tom said fin-ternally.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Swimmin’! Get ready to splash into some hilarious jokes!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Swim. Swim who? Swim-thing funny about to happen!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Coral. Coral who? Coral you ready for some swimming puns?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Pool. Pool who? Pool-larious jokes about swimming!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Mermaid. Mermaid who? Mermaid to make you laugh with these swimming jokes!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Flippers. Flippers who? Flippers crossed that these swimming jokes are funny!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Swimtastic. Swimtastic who? Swimtastic jokes to make you giggle!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Drowning. Drowning who? Drowning in laughter from these swimming jokes!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Swim coach. Swim coach who? Swim coach says these jokes are the best!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Butterfly. Butterfly who? Butterfly joke will have you laughing!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Water slide. Water slide who? Water slide into these funny swimming jokes!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Snorkel. Snorkel who? Snorkel your way through these hilarious swimming jokes!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Swim trunks. Swim trunks who? Swim trunks don’t get enough credit, but these jokes will give them some!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cannonball. Cannonball who? Cannonball into these jokes and have a splashin’ good time!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fin. Fin who? Fin-tastic jokes about swimming!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Noodle. Noodle who? Noodle around with these swimming jokes!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Swim cap. Swim cap who? Swim cap-tivating jokes to make you laugh!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lifeguard. Lifeguard who? Lifeguarding these jokes to make sure they’re funny!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Pool party. Pool party who? Pool party-ing with these jokes!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Splash. Splash who? Splash-ing good time with these swimming jokes!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Freestyle. Freestyle who? Freestyle your way through these funny swimming jokes!
Making a Splash with Swimming Malapropisms
- Doggy paddling: Instead of doing the traditional doggy paddle, one attempts to paddle with an actual dog.
- Butterfly stroke: Swimming while wearing butterfly wings.
- Breast reduction: Mistaking the breaststroke for a way to reduce the size of one’s chest.
- Backside stroke: A variation of the backstroke where one swims on their backside instead of their back.
- Freestyle fries: Swimming while simultaneously snacking on french fries.
- Front crawl space: A mix-up of the front crawl stroke and outer space.
- Diving into books: Rather than diving into a pool, one mistakenly dives into a stack of books.
- Pool noodling: Attempting to swim using pool noodles as flippers.
- Float like a butterfly, sting like a bee: A play on words from the famous Muhammad Ali quote, but applied to swimming – trying to float like a butterfly while stinging like a bee.
- Backsplash: When one accidentally splashes water with their back while swimming.
- Flip-flop turns: Attempting to turn at the end of a lap by flipping upside-down and flopping onto one’s back.
- Sink or swim suit: A swimsuit that can either help one swim or sink, depending on how well it fits.
- Breaststroke milk: Substituting breaststroke for breast milk.
- Cannonballerina: Doing a cannonball into the pool while simultaneously striking a ballerina pose.
- Snorkel thunk: When one accidentally hits their head on a snorkel while trying to swim.
- Floating feelings: Using flotation devices to express emotions while swimming.
- Backstroking through life: Taking a more relaxed approach to life, as if swimming on one’s back.
- Treading noodles: Attempting to stay afloat by treading water with pool noodles instead of one’s own arms and legs.
- Backstroke of genius: A brilliant idea or a stroke of luck while swimming the backstroke.
- Belly flop therapy: The act of therapeutic belly flopping into a pool to release stress or tension.
Making a Splash with These Hilarious Spoonerisms about Swimming
- “Goggle Foggles”
- “Pooltery Bumps”
- “Divehopping Strokes”
- “Water Flirty”
- “Swimmy Sink”
- “Floatiful Splashes”
- “Pup Splashing”
- “Diving Wizzards”
- “Breaststrokey Floaties”
- “Marco Plop”
- “Backstroker Seabugs”
- “Butterflip Strokes”
- “Fart Crawling”
- “Swim Snorker”
- “Flip Noodle”
- “Lifeguard Lemons”
- “Pool Poop”
- “Racing Backbay”
- “Swimmy Wozzles”
- “Synchronized Golf”
Dive into these puns and make a SPLASH!
And that, my friends, wraps up our deep dive into swimming puns! We hope you had a splashing good time and that these puns left you feeling buoyant and full of laughter. But don’t just take our word for it, swim on over to our other puns and joke posts for more giggles and groans. Until next time, remember to always keep your head above water and your sense of humor afloat. Happy swimming!