Laugh Your Pipes Off: 210+ Hilarious Plumber Jokes & Puns
Are you ready to laugh your pipes off? Because we’ve got the best collection of plumber jokes and puns that are sure to make any kid, or adult, crack a smile. Get ready to fix that leak in your mood with our clever and humorous list of puns about everyone’s favorite tradesperson – the plumber. So sit back, relax, and get ready for some positive humor. Trust us, these jokes will leave you in stitches (not the sewing kind). Let’s dive in, shall we?
Flush Away Your Sorrow with These Hilarious Plumber Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks
- What did the plumber say when he finished fixing the toilet? “Looks like that one really took the plunge!”
- I asked the plumber if he had any advice for my clogged sink. He said, “Just go with the flow.”
- Why did the plumber bring a wallet with him to work? In case he needed to make a pipe-line.
- The plumber accidentally took too many laxatives before work and ended up having a very busy day.
- Why did the plumber drink so much coffee on the job? He needed to stay fluid.
- I called a plumber to fix my broken toilet, but he was still eating his lunch. I guess he was on his lunch break.
- I asked the plumber why he started his own business. He said, “I couldn’t stop the urge to be my own boss.”
- Why did the plumber quit his job at the music store? Because he was tired of dealing with all the clogs.
- The plumber told me he had a crush on a girl who worked at the hardware store. I guess you could say he had pipe dreams.
- What did the plumber say when he found a leaky faucet? “Looks like this one is trying to drip me crazy.”
- Why did the plumber refuse to fix a bathroom on a pirate ship? Because it was full of barnacles.
- Did you hear about the plumber who got stuck in a drain? He was totally drained.
- The plumber told me he could fix my shower in no time. He’s always been very faucet.
- Why did the plumber have a hard time finding a job? Because he kept flushing his opportunities away.
- What did the faucet say to the plumber? “You turn me on.”
- Why did the plumber never get invited to backyard barbecues? He always brought his own PVC pipe.
- The plumber told me he had a long-relationship with pipes. He said it was a drainage that never ended.
- What did the plumber say when he couldn’t find his wrench? “Looks like I’ve misplaced my pipe-wrenches.”
- Why did the plumber refuse to work with copper pipes? He’s always been more of a lead kind of guy.
- The plumber told me he didn’t mind working with sewage. He said he was used to dealing with people’s crap.
Drip with laughter over these funny plumber one-liner jokes!
- Did you hear about the plumber who couldn’t get a date? It turns out he was just afraid of his own pipe dreams.
- I asked the plumber if he could fix my sink in record time. He replied, “I’ll just need to take a leak first.”
- What did the toilet say to the plumber? “You’ve got me in a tough spot.”
- I hired a plumber to fix my water heater, but he ended up heating our conversation instead.
- Why did the plumber start a comedy club? He had a lot of potty jokes to flush out.
- My plumber friend told me he was training for a marathon. I asked him what his goal was and he said, “To finish with a great time.”
- How does a plumber deal with a difficult customer? He just goes with the flow.
- You know you’re getting old when you hire a plumber instead of trying to fix your own toilet.
- I hired a plumber to fix my sink, but he ended up just pouring his heart out to me instead.
- Did you hear about the plumber who got into a fight? He was a real tough guy, but he always had a leaky faucet.
- What do you call a plumber who can’t fix a leak? A slow drip.
- Did you hear about the plumber who tried to tap dance? He ended up with two left feet.
- I asked my plumber if he had any tips for saving water. He said, “Just don’t tell my boss I told you this, but you can flush your troubles away.”
- Why did the plumber take the day off? He needed to put his feet up and rest.
- Did you hear about the plumber who tried to tell jokes? He was really good at flushing out the competition.
- How does a plumber flirt? He turns on the charm.
- What did the plumber say to his apprentice? “I’ve been plumbing for years, so just go with the flow.”
- Why couldn’t the plumber find his drain snake? He had a clogged memory.
- What’s a plumber’s favorite song? “Drain, Drain, Go Away.”
- Why did the plumber quit his job? He was tired of dealing with all the crap.
Flush out some laughter with these QnA jokes & puns about plumbers!
- Q: Why was the plumber feeling drained? A: Because the toilet wouldn’t flush and it was severely affecting his career.
- Q: How does a plumber make sure his clients are satisfied? A: By providing top-notch service and always cracking a few jokes to keep them laughing.
- Q: Why did the plumber quit his job? A: The stress of constantly dealing with clogs and leaks was draining the life out of him.
- Q: Why is a plumber’s bank account always empty? A: Because they’re always flushing their money down the drain on expensive tools and equipment.
- Q: What did the plumber say to his apprentice? A: Let’s get crack-a-lackin and fix this leaky pipe before it becomes a major problem.
- Q: How does a plumber unclog a toilet? A: With a lot of elbow grease and a good sense of humor.
- Q: What’s a plumber’s favorite type of music? A: Drain-age rock! It really gets them in the mood for some serious plumbing work.
- Q: Why did the plumber refuse to work on a yacht? A: He was afraid he’d end up sinking the ship instead of fixing the pipes.
- Q: What do you call a plumber who likes to play practical jokes? A: A pipe prankster!
- Q: How does a plumber stay in shape? A: By lifting heavy pipes and doing a lot of snake-like movements to unclog drains.
- Q: What did the plumber say when he was asked to fix a shower? A: I’ll be there in a jiffy, this should be a pretty tubular experience.
- Q: What do you call a plumber with a fancy degree? A: A master of pipes, or perhaps a faucet professor.
- Q: Why did the plumber get so emotional while fixing a sink? A: Because the faucet was always dripping, and he just couldn’t handle the constant tears.
- Q: What’s a plumber’s favorite type of vegetable? A: Cauli-flower! It reminds them of those pesky caulk lines they have to deal with.
- Q: How many plumbers does it take to fix a toilet? A: Just one, but they’ll tell you a million jokes while doing it.
- Q: Why did the plumber start using recycled materials? A: Because he was tired of always spending money on new pipes and fittings.
- Q: What did the drain say to the plumber? A: Can you help me unclog? I’m feeling a bit backed up.
- Q: How does a plumber feel after a long day of work? A: Drained, but also satisfied knowing they helped fix someone’s plumbing problems.
- Q: Why did the plumber refuse to work on a haunted house? A: He didn’t want to deal with ghostly pipelines and spooky leaks.
- Q: What’s a plumber’s favorite type of cereal? A: Cl-O-A-Kies! They love starting their day with a good bowl of humor.
Pipe Dreams and Handy Quotes: Funny and Wise Proverbs for Plumbers
- A plumber’s work is never done, but that doesn’t mean they can’t take a bathroom break.
- A good plumber never leaks information, only pipes.
- You can’t fix a leaky faucet with duct tape, but a plumber can.
- A plumber’s motto: “We flush what you can’t handle.”
- When life gives you clogged drains, call a plumber.
- A plumber’s job is like a never-ending game of whack-a-mole.
- You know you’re dealing with a bad plumber when they start using a plunger as a wrench.
- A wise plumber always has a spare roll of toilet paper in their toolbox.
- A plumber’s idea of a romantic dinner involves pasta and a drain snake.
- Trust me, you don’t want to hire a plumber who has a “can’t fix, won’t fix” attitude.
- If at first you don’t succeed, call a plumber.
- The only time a plumber will ever see a perfectly clean toilet is on their day off.
- A true plumber is always ready to take a plunge.
- Every time you flush, remember to thank a plumber.
- Plumbing is like magic: it may not always make sense, but it sure does get the job done.
- A plumber’s favorite dance move? The pipe shuffle.
- When it comes to plumbing, always go with the flow.
- A plumber’s biggest fear is running out of Teflon tape.
- The secret to a happy marriage? Good communication and a reliable plumber.
- If you think hiring a professional plumber is expensive, just wait until you hire an amateur.
Pipe Up and Laugh with These Dad Jokes about Plumbers
- Why did the plumber not enjoy his job? Because it was just a pipe dream.
- Did you hear about the plumber who tried to fix a broken pipe with a band-aid? It was a temporary fix.
- How does a plumber answer the phone? “Pipe, pipe, hooray!”
- What did the plumber say when he couldn’t find his wrench? “I’ve plumbed lost it!”
- Did you hear about the plumber who got arrested? He was charged with pipe-lifting.
- Why did the plumber bring a snake to work? To unclog the toilet, of course.
- How do you fix a broken sink? Call the sink-doctor, a.k.a. the plumber.
- Why did the plumber go to therapy? He had too many pipe dreams.
- What do you call a plumber’s favorite song? A pipe tune.
- What did the plumber say when he saw a leaky faucet? “Looks like another drip in the bucket.”
- Why did the plumber always work alone? They preferred to work on a solo-flush-tic project.
- What do you call a plumber who loves his job? A pipe-dreamer.
- How does a plumber stay healthy? By avoiding drainjing activities.
- Why did the plumber refuse to fix the sink? He didn’t want to sink any lower.
- What do you call a plumber sent by the mafia? A pipenforcer.
- Why did the plumber switch careers and become a musician? He had a flair for tuber-cleaning.
- How does a plumber stay organized? With a plumbline.
- What did the plumber say when he couldn’t find any tools? “Looks like I’m plumb out of luck.”
- Why did the plumber feel bad for the leaky faucet? Because it was going through a difficult drip.
- How many plumbers does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they’re too busy fixing pipes!
Plumber Up Your Day with Double Entendres and Puns That’ll Leave You Chuckling!
- “Looks like we’ve hit a clog in the pipes…better get my plunger and my plumber’s crack ready.”
- “The new guy on the job is a real drip…but he knows how to lay some serious pipe.”
- “When I pulled out my pipe wrench, she couldn’t help but blush.”
- “I’ve been in the plumbing business for years, so I know how to handle all kinds of leaks.”
- “I may not be the most skilled plumber, but I can definitely make your pipes gush.”
- “The trick to unclogging a toilet is to use a gentle touch…just like when you’re snaking the bathroom pipes.”
- “My wife says I have a real talent for laying pipe…but she’s not talking about plumbing.”
- “I’ve never met a leak I couldn’t fix…in both the plumbing and relationship sense.”
- “I may be a plumber by trade, but I’m an expert in finding the right pipe.”
- “Don’t worry, ma’am, I’ll have your kitchen sink up and running in no time…and maybe your heart too.”
- “I’ve got all the tools necessary to fix your plumbing…including a charming smile.”
- “I’m a plumber, not a magician…but I can make your faucet disappear with just one turn of the wrench.”
- “I always say, if you want something done right, call a plumber…especially when it comes to unclogging your drains.”
- “They say plumbers make great husbands…because they know how to take care of all your pipes.”
- “When it comes to plumbing, my motto is ‘go with the flow’…both literally and figuratively.”
- “I specialize in hot water repairs…and hot dates, if you catch my drift.”
- “There’s no job too big or too small for this plumber…I’ll handle anything your pipes throw my way.”
- “My wife says I have a natural knack for plumbing…but I think she’s just impressed by how I hold a wrench.”
- “Forget the old saying ‘like a kid in a candy store’…for me, it’s like a plumber in a hardware store.”
- “I’ve got a plumbing pun for every occasion…I guess you could say it’s my pipe-line.”
Plumbing through the Depths of Recursive Comedy: Puns about Plumbers
- Why did the plumber always bring a ladder to work? To ensure he had a step up on the competition.
- Did you hear about the plumber who had a fear of drains? He just couldn’t seem to get over it.
- What did one plumber say to the other when he was feeling down? Don’t worry, we’ll pipe you up.
- How does a plumber celebrate a job well done? With a plumb-bob party, of course.
- Why did the plumber refuse to fix the leaky faucet? Because he didn’t want to be accused of having a wrench in the works.
- What did the plumber say when he successfully unclogged the toilet? Looks like I’ve flushed another problem down the drain.
- Did you hear about the plumber’s new weight loss plan? He’s been trying to shed some pipe pounds.
- Why did the plumber refuse to fix the sink in the haunted house? He didn’t want to get sucked into any paranormal plumbing problems.
- What did the plumber say when he was trying to impress a date? Let me show you how well I can handle my pipe.
- Why did the plumber have a hard time fixing the shower? It kept running away from him.
- What did the plumber say to the leaky toilet? You’re a real pain in the drain.
- How does a plumber organize his tools? He arranges them in plumbline order.
- Why did the plumber start using emojis instead of words? Because sometimes a picture is worth a thousand words…or pipes.
- What’s a plumber’s favorite type of music? Pipe organ, of course.
- What did the plumber say to the frozen pipes? Let it flow, let it flow, let it flow.
- Why did the plumber hire an accountant? To help him keep his financial pipes in order.
- What did the plumber say to the new apprentice? You have some big shoes to fill in these drain pipes.
- Why did the plumber decide to become a poet? He just couldn’t contain his overflowing love for pipes and drains.
- What did the plumber say when he saw the price of a new tool? That’s not too wrenching on the wallet.
- Did you hear about the plumber who started his own band? They called it The Plumb Tones.
Plumber’s Play on Words: Hilarious Malapropisms in the Plumbing Business
- “My pipes are acting up, I think there’s a plumbus stuck in the drain.”
- “I’ve been a plumber for 20 years, I really know how to grip the rooter.”
- “Before I start working on your toilet, I need to put on my monkey wrench.”
- “I’ve been dealing with some serious dinglebarries in the sewer line.”
- “My boss always tells me to tighten the flasket, but I think he means the flapper.”
- “This clogged drain is no match for my plunger sword.”
- “I’m not just a plumber, I’m a master of the porcelain throne.”
- “I could fix this leaky faucet blindfolded, I’m a real gravity-defyer.”
- “My van is fully equipped with all the latest plumbamentals.”
- “I need to use my snake to clear out the u-bend, it’s feeling a bit snaky.”
- “I’ll have this busted pipe fixed in no time, I’m like a wookietight grip.”
- “I’m like a detective, I can find the source of any leak with my leakalyzer.”
- “Sometimes my job really goes down the toilet, but at least I’m flush with cash.”
- “I always bring my trusty plumber’s assistant, Drip, with me on jobs.”
- “I never leave a customer’s home without making sure their plumb-closet is fully stocked.”
- “You can’t scare me with tales of septic tank ghosts, I’m a brave plumber.”
- “I’m like a plumber-artist, creating masterpieces with my pipes and fittings.”
- “My motto is: ‘If there’s a problem, plumb it.'”
- “I’d never cheat on my wife, she’s the plunger to my heart.”
- “My dream is to someday open my own plumb-cottage on the beach.”
Plummeting Jokes: Hilarious Spoonerisms about Plumbers
- “Plumb Fumbler” instead of “Plumb Fumbler”
- “Lumber Pumber” instead of “Plumber Lumber”
- “Chubby Bummer” instead of “Plumber’s Buddy”
- “Flushing Mishap” instead of “Plumbing Mishap”
- “Dripping Faucet” instead of “Flipping Daucet”
- “Silly Wrench” instead of “Willy Sprench”
- “Pipe Peeper” instead of “Pype Piper”
- “Clogged Drains” instead of “Dogged Crans”
- “Toilet Troubles” instead of “Troulet Tibbles”
- “Leaky Sink” instead of “Sakey Link”
- “Snakey Plunge” instead of “Playing Plunge”
- “Soggy Sockets” instead of “Coggy Sockers”
- “Flooded Basement” instead of “Bloated Facement”
- “Gassy Plunger” instead of “Passy Glunger”
- “Moldy Grout” instead of “Goldy Mrount”
- “Shower Showdown” instead of “Shower Sowdown”
- “Wacky Wrenching” instead of “Wrenchy Wacking”
- “Draining Dilemma” instead of “Draining Dilema”
- “Rusty Pipes” instead of “Pusty Ripes”
- “Bumbling Fixer” instead of “Fumbling Bixer”
Drain Your Laughter with These Hilarious Plumber Tom Swifties!
- “I’m feeling drained after a long day of unclogging,” said Tom swiflty.
- “This faucet is really starting to get on my nerves,” said Tom disdainfully.
- “Looks like I need to lay some serious pipe,” said Tom heavily.
- “I think I’ll take a plunge into the plumbing business,” said Tom suddenly.
- “I feel like I’m twisting in the wind with this leaky pipe,” said Tom unsteadily.
- “This sewage system is really backing up,” said Tom grimly.
- “I’ll have this job done in a flush,” said Tom confidently.
- “I have a knack for finding cracks in pipes,” said Tom seamlessly.
- “It’s a good thing I can think outside the drain,” said Tom reflectively.
- “I’ll have this plumbing problem fixed in no time,” said Tom quickly.
- “Looks like I need to tighten up my skills,” said Tom firmly.
- “I never forget to bring my plunger, just in case,” said Tom plungingly.
- “Looks like I’m knee-deep in a sticky situation,” said Tom mired.
- “I may not be the fanciest plumber, but I get the job done,” said Tom modestly.
- “I don’t like to brag, but I can fix any plumbing issue with ease,” said Tom smoothly.
- “It’s all about knowing how to handle your tool,” said Tom wrenchingly.
- “Being a plumber is all about finding the right connection,” said Tom with a spark.
- “I never let a drip get me down,” said Tom drippingly.
- “Looks like I need to put a plug on this geyser,” said Tom explosively.
- “I’ve found my niche in life, and it’s all thanks to plumbing,” said Tom pipingly.
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Not a plumber, but these jokes are pipe-lining funny.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Plumber. Plumber who? Plumbering all day just to fix your leaky faucet!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ralph. Ralph who? Ralph the plumber here to unclog your toilet.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Penny. Penny who? Penny for your thoughts on my plumbing skills.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Hugo. Hugo who? Hugo-get-a better plumber if you want your pipes fixed properly.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lizzy. Lizzy who? Lizzy called, your plumbing is leaking again.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Olive. Olive who? Olive to be your plumber for all your plumbing needs.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Jasper. Jasper who? Jasper my plumber, I’ll fix it in a jiffy.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Donnie. Donnie who? Donnie worry, I’m a certified plumber.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Nora. Nora who? Nora plumber can fix your clogged drain.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Curtis. Curtis who? Curtis the plumber, here to save the day!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Rita. Rita who? Rita-round the clock plumber, at your service.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Frankie. Frankie who? Frankie-tastic plumber here to make all your plumbing woes disappear.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Malcolm. Malcolm who? Malcolm on the job, your friendly neighborhood plumber.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Gloria. Gloria who? Gloria the plumber, ready to fix your broken pipes.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Katie. Katie who? Katie the plumber, I’ll have your water flowing in no time.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Nate. Nate who? Nate-ural plumber, I’ve been doing this for years.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Becky. Becky who? Becky-use I’m the best plumber around!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Wally. Wally who? Wally-away, this plumber’s on a mission to fix your plumbing.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Vera. Vera who? Vera-experienced plumber, I guarantee your satisfaction.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tyler. Tyler who? Tyler your sink just broke, but lucky for you I’m a plumber!
Flush and funny: The pipe-ing hot puns!
Well, I hope you got a good laugh and didn’t feel too ‘flushed’ out after reading these 210+ plumber puns! But don’t let the puns stop here, make sure to check out our other hilarious posts about all things plumbing and keep the ‘flow’ going. Remember, laughter is the best medicine, but a good plumber is a close second. Happy punning!