Swimming in Laughter: 200+ Crocodile Jokes & Puns

Welcome to the best place for some clever and positive humor – a list of crocodile jokes and puns that will have both kids and adults rolling with laughter! These joke-slinging reptiles may seem intimidating, but we’ve got a whole arsenal of funny jokes to take them down (figuratively, of course). So get ready to dive into our pun-tastic world of crocodile humor, and embrace the hilarity that ensues. Let’s not waste any more time, time to snap into these crocodile jokes!

Snappy and Hilarious: Our Top ‘Crocodile’ Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks!

Why was the crocodile feeling depressed? Because he couldn’t find any good scales!
What do you call an alligator in a vest? An inVESTigator.
Did you hear about the crocodile who went on a diet? He was trying to be a slim-odile.
Why did the crocodile cross the road? To get to the other swamp!
What do you call a crocodile that likes to bowl? A strike-o-dile.
What is a crocodile’s favorite game show? “Wheel of Fortune”!
How do you make a crocodile laugh? Tell him a “tail” joke!
What did the crocodile say when he saw a zebra with no stripes? “Looks like dinner is ‘off the grid’ tonight!”
I saw a crocodile in the movie theater last night. He was at the “Tears of the Nile” screening.
Why do crocodiles always cry with their eyes closed? Because they never want to admit they are “watering” their food.
How do you make a crocodile really angry? Just mention the word “chicken.”
What do you call a crocodile in a tuxedo? A “dino-mite” dresser!
Did you hear about the crocodile who went on strike? He was tired of working for “peanuts.”
Why did the crocodile start taking ballet lessons? He wanted to learn how to do a “swan” dive.
What is a crocodile’s favorite type of music? “Rock and Croc”!
How do you know if a crocodile has been to the dentist? His smile will be toothy-perfect!
What’s the difference between a crocodile and an alligator? One will see you later and the other will see you in a while.
What do you call a lazy crocodile? A crock-odidle!
What did the crocodile say to the other crocodile when they bumped into each other? “Sorry, my bad-army!”
Why did the crocodile go to therapy? He had a reptile dysfunction.

funny Crocodile jokes with one liner clever Crocodile puns at PunnyFunny.com

Tickle Your Funny Bone with These ‘Crocodile’ One-Liner Jokes!

Why did the crocodile go to the dentist? Because he wanted to improve his croc-odile smile!
Have you heard about the party at the crocodile’s house? It was a snappy affair.
What do you call a crocodile that becomes a comedian? A stand-up reptile.
Why did the crocodile get a job at the shoe factory? Because he wanted to be a croc-maker.
What do you call a crocodile in a vest? An investigator.
How do you know when a crocodile is playing hide and seek? When it’s in plain sight, pretending to be a log.
Why do crocodiles make terrible date planners? They always see things in black and white, with no room for flexibility.
Why couldn’t the crocodile ever have a steady job? Because he was always on the lookout for a better swan opportunity.
Did you hear about the doctor who performed surgery on a crocodile? He really took a chance-saw.
How does a crocodile send a message to another crocodile? With a snapchat, of course!
What do you call a crocodile who wears a suit? An investi-gator.
Why do crocodiles love listening to music underwater? Because they’re huge fans of the crock and roll genre.
What do you call a fancy crocodile? An eleg-ant croc.
How do you make a crocodile laugh? Just tell him a joke and wait for his jaw to drop.
What was the crocodile doing at the bank? Making a deposit and some withdrawals.
Why don’t crocodiles like going to the dentists? They always end up with lots of cavities.
What’s a crocodile’s favorite subject in school? Algeb-croc.
How does a crocodile stay cool in the summer? By staying in the shade and taking plenty of snaps.
Why are crocodiles such terrible liars? Because they can never keep a straight face.
What’s a crocodile’s favorite time of day? Tea time. After all, they do enjoy a nice cup of crockery.

Snappy Responses: QnA Jokes & Puns about Crocodile

What did the crocodile say when he couldn’t find his wallet? “Aww, snap!”
Why did the crocodile go to the dentist? To get some scales polished!
How does a crocodile communicate with other animals? Through snap-chat.
What do you call a sneaky crocodile? A reptile deceiver.
Why did the crocodile buy sunglasses? To avoid getting eye-gator.
How does a crocodile send messages? Through its jaws.
What do you call a crocodile in a vest? An investi-gator.
How did the crocodile lose its job? It got fired for being too snaughty.
Why did the crocodile cross the road? To prove he wasn’t chicken.
What’s a crocodile’s favorite footwear? Crocs, of course!
Why did the crocodile decide to become a comedian? Because it had a great sense of humor-odile.
How did the crocodile become a fashion model? It had a killer smile.
Why did the crocodile go to therapy? Because he was having an identity crisis: was he a reptile or just a big handbag?
What is a crocodile’s favorite type of music? Rock and croc.
Why did the crocodile take up knitting? Because it wanted to make some snappy sweaters.
Why did the crocodile refuse to eat anything except chicken? Because it was afraid of catching snaflu.
What do you call a crocodile with a GPS? A navigator-gator.
Why did the crocodile start its own business? It wanted to be an entre-gator.
How many crocodiles does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they prefer to live in the dark.
Why did the crocodile go to the doctor? It had a terrible case of croc-oconnoritis.

Snap, Crackle, Chuckle: Hilarious Proverbs & Sayings about Crocodiles

A hungry crocodile doesn’t care whether its prey is meat or vegetable.
A wise man once said, “Never smile at a crocodile, especially if you’re lunch.”
A crocodile’s tears may deceive the naive, but its jaws never lie.
Crocodiles have a thick skin, but not as thick as their ego.
A crocodile may have a great smile, but its bite is nothing to laugh about.
A crocodile never forgets, especially when it comes to dinner.
It’s better to be safe than to be “snapped” by a crocodile.
Don’t put all your eggs in one crocodile-infested river.
As wise as a crocodile? Only if you consider strategizing for a successful ambush wise.
A crocodile on land is dangerous, but a crocodile in water is deadly.
You can’t make a leather purse out of a crocodile’s snout.
When life gives you lemons… make sure there aren’t any crocodiles around before you make lemonade.
Even the most ferocious crocodile will tremble at the sight of a dentist.
Foolish is the man who plays tug of war with a crocodile’s tail.
You can’t teach an old crocodile new tricks, but you can definitely get out of its way.
If a crocodile starts talking to you, run! You’re either in a Disney movie or it’s about to eat you.
There’s always something fishy about a crocodile’s intentions.
Some people are like crocodiles, they only show their true colors when they want to bite.
Crocodiles may have big appetites, but they have even bigger jaws.
The saying goes “opposites attract,” but a crocodile and a zebra would beg to differ.

Sinking Your Teeth into These Hilarious Dad Jokes About Crocodiles

What do you call a crocodile in a vest? An investi-gator.
Why did the crocodile refuse to buy a new toothbrush? He was afraid of a brush with death.
A crocodile walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey, we’ve got a drink named after you!” The crocodile replies, “You must mean the ‘cocktail’!”
What’s a crocodile’s favorite game? Snap and Seek.
Why did the crocodile go on a diet? He wanted to watch his reptile style.
Did you hear about the shoe store where a crocodile works? It’s called Croc Mart.
What do you get when you divide the circumference of a crocodile by its diameter? Croc Pi.
Why was the crocodile always depressed? He had a reptile dysfunction.
Why did the crocodile text his ex-girlfriend? He wanted to say he was still missing her, but she was too good at dodging his texts.
What do you call a crocodile in a vest, sitting on a unicorn? A uni-gator.
What’s a crocodile’s favorite meal? A snap-roni and cheese.
Where do crocodiles keep their money? In their river banks.
How does a crocodile keep his teeth shiny? With mental floss.
What do you call a crocodile wearing a cowboy hat? A Croc-odile Dundee.
What’s a crocodile’s favorite dance move? The snap and roll.
Why was the crocodile so good at basketball? He had killer crossover moves.
What did one crocodile say to the other during their annual dance party? “Let’s make this snappy!”
Why do crocodile couples never stay together? There’s too much snappage between them.
What did the crocodile say when he won the lottery? “Snapping is life-changing!”
What do you call a crocodile with a GPS? A Navi-gator.

Crocodile Tears and Double Entendres: A Punny Pairing

“I’m feeling a bit on edge today…I must have been bitten by the crocodile of anxiety.”
“Did you hear about the sneaky crocodile who stole all the toilet paper? He’s on a roll!”
“Wow, that suit is quite a snappy dresser…just like a crocodile!”
“I wouldn’t trust that shady salesman as far as I can throw him…he’s a bit of a crocodile in suit.”
“Have you seen the latest crocodile skin handbags? They’re really quite reptile-able.”
“Why did the crocodile go on a diet? He wanted to be more lean and scaly.”
“Once a crocodile gets you in its jaws, there’s no hope for a happy ending…just a tail of woe.”
“How do you keep a crocodile entertained? You give him a toothbrush and a long conversation.”
“My neighbor must be part crocodile…he always snaps at me when I borrow his lawnmower.”
“I wouldn’t trust that crocodile dentist…I hear he’s been known to have a few bite marks on his record.”
“Why was the crocodile confused? He couldn’t decide if he was an alligator or a croc-onut.”
“I heard they opened up a fancy restaurant for crocodiles only…must be for those with refined tastes.”
“If someone ever tells you they have a pet crocodile, just make sure they’re being literal and not figurative.”
“You know you’re a true croc connoisseur when you can spot the difference between a saltwater and freshwater crocodile at a glance.”
“I was feeling a bit croc-ky this morning…but then I had a cup of coffee and now I’m feeling a little less snappy.”
“Why did the crocodile go to the therapist? He had some repressed scales.”
“My friend bet me he could do a handstand longer than a crocodile…I think he’s just trying to be a show-off.”
“What did the confused crocodile say? ‘Is it just me or did that chicken taste like alligator?'”
“You know you’re in Crocodile Dundee country when the statue of limitations has an actual statue of a crocodile.”
“There’s a fine line between being crocodile smart and just plain cro-crazy.”

Humor that will make you snap: Recursive Puns about Crocodile!

Why couldn’t the crocodile finish its meal? It got caught in a vicious cycle!
How does a crocodile double-cross someone? It uses its crocodile tears!
Why did the crocodile keep telling the same joke over and over again? It just couldn’t help but retile it!
How do crocodiles communicate with each other? They have a re-croc-tive language!
Where do crocodiles go when they need a break? To the re-croc-very room!
What do you call a crocodile with a broken tooth? A recroc!
Why did the crocodile cross the road twice? To have a recursive chuckle!
How did the crocodile feel after eating too much? Recursive!
Why didn’t the crocodile trust the quack doctor? He was a recroc-screw-tive!
How do you know when a crocodile is feeling nostalgic? It starts to recroach on its past!
What did the crocodile say when it ran out of puns? I’ve hit rock recroc bottom!
What’s a crocodile’s favorite type of music? Recroc and roll!
Why did the crocodile refuse to let anyone touch its tail? It was too recroc-sensitive!
How does a crocodile prepare for an important meeting? With a recroc-ca-pella!
What do you call a crocodile that pokes fun at other crocodiles? A recroc-teaser!
Why did the crocodile go back to school? To learn about recroc angles!
How does a crocodile improve its memory? By attending recroc-nition classes!
Why couldn’t the crocodile hold down a job as a comedian? It just kept making recroc-tions!
What’s a crocodile’s favorite game to play? Re-croc-tangle!
What did the crocodile say when it finished telling all its recursive puns? I think I’ve just completed my re-croc-dex!

Crocodile Tears and Malapropisms: A Combo That’ll Snap You Up

“I’m going to buy some crocodiles and make a living selling croquet sets.”
“Don’t be such a crocodile, just apologize already!”
“I was so scared, my heart was beating like a crocodile.”
“I’ve got a crocodile in my throat, can someone pass the cough alligator?”
“I can’t believe you fell for his crocodile tears.”
“I tried to make lemonade, but the store was out of crocodiles.”
“I need to stop putting the cart before the crocodile.”
“My neighbor has been telling crocos a lot lately, I don’t know if I believe him anymore.”
“I need to go to the doctor, I think I have a case of crocodile tunnel syndrome.”
“I can’t hang out tonight, I have to do some crocodile crossing.”
“I was so angry, I could have bitten off my own snout.”
“I can’t decide if I want pizza or a crocodile for dinner.”
“I’m not a fan of that band, their music is too crocodilian for me.”
“My doctor told me I have high levels of cholesterol and crocodile. I think it’s time to lay off the reptiles.”
“I don’t understand why people say I’m crocodiling around, I was just taking a leisurely stroll.”
“I love watching nature documentaries, especially the ones about crocheting.”
“Why do you keep yelling at me? You’re acting like a real crocodonna.”
“I heard he’s really good at telling crocodolescents.”
“I tried to make a joke about crocodiles, but it was a real flop-o-dile.”
“I need to buy some new shoes, these ones are really crocodile-ing me.

Crazy Crikey: Hilarious Spoonerisms about Crocodiles

“Frocodile Cunch”
“Crocodile Book”
“Crocodile Fake”
“Crocked Dial”
“Codile Rots”
“Crowd of Lido”
“Crock Pot File”
“Fiddle Crock”
“Lyle Foydile”
“Drocodile Calm”
“Crazy Docfile”
“Toddle Crock”
“Gator Coiled”
“Mockodile Cew”
“Silly Crook”
“Bottle Crock”
“Rocking Frink”
“Wacky Rocco”
“Tangle Croons”
“Funky Crocleg”

Crocodile tears? More like ‘sob-cans’ for this clever Tom Swiftie!

“I can’t believe he ate my sandwich,” said Tom crocodiley.
“I’ve been trying to reach the other side for hours,” croaked the crocodile Tom.
“I prefer my water in a river,” said the crocodile Tom streamlessly.
“I always have a smile on my face,” beamed the crocodile Tom jaw-droppingly.
“I don’t like this game,” grumbled the crocodile Tom snappily.
“I forgot to put on sunscreen,” basked the crocodile Tom sunnily.
“This party is a bore,” yawned the crocodile Tom lackadaisically.
“I could use a good dental cleaning,” hissed the crocodile Tom toothily.
“I never get tired of swimming,” gushed the crocodile Tom fantastically.
“I love it when people underestimate me,” grinned the crocodile Tom cunningly.
“I’ll catch this fish with my eyes closed,” boasted the crocodile Tom blindly.
“I could really go for a chicken dinner,” drooled the crocodile Tom hungrily.
“I’m not afraid of anything,” boasted the crocodile Tom fearlessly.
“I’m feeling a little blue today,” said the crocodile Tom greenly.
“I’m not a fan of large crowds,” murmured the crocodile Tom shyly.
“I could use a vacation,” sighed the crocodile Tom wearily.
“I don’t understand how humans walk on two legs,” pondered the crocodile Tom leglessly.
“I think I’ll take a bite out of that phone,” snapped the crocodile Tom dangerously.
“I might be tiny, but I’m fierce,” growled the crocodile Tom minusculely.
“I’m not afraid of heights,” boasted the crocodile Tom lying down.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? A snappy Crocodile with a joke to share!

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile dentures, they bite!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile shoes fit for a big mouth!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile crossing, watch your step!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile tears, don’t be fooled!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile Dundee, mate!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile Dundee’s cousin, Crocodile Darnell!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile Dundee’s brother, Crocodile Doug!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? See you later, crocodile!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile Rock, let’s do the twist!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile clips for a snappy hairstyle!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Never smile at a crocodile, they’ll think you’re dinner!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile wrestling, watch out for the tail!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile Dundee’s sister, Crocodila!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile hunter, mate!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Dundee’s mate, Crocodile Bruce!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile pool party, don’t forget your floaties!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile’s toothbrush, made of sharp teeth!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile dentist, beware of the bite!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Snap, Crackle, Crocodile!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crocodile. Crocodile who? Crocodile Dundee’s wife, Mrs. Dundee!

Crocs and Giggles: Wrapping Up the Fun!

As we wrap up this post overflowing with crocodile-themed puns and jokes, I hope you were able to sink your teeth into some belly-wrenching laughter. But don’t be a scaly-sport and stop here – be sure to check out our other pun and joke posts for more gut-busting humor. Now go forth and make some snappy puns of your own!