210+ Shots of Humor: Tequila Just Got Punned!

funny Tequila jokes with one liner clever Tequila puns at PunnyFunny.com

Looking for a good laugh? Tequila, known for its smooth taste and wild nights, also happens to be the butt of some of the best puns out there. From clever wordplay to silly one-liners, these tequila jokes are sure to brighten up your day. So grab a margarita and get ready to laugh your way through this list of hilariously funny and positive jokes for kids (and adults, too!). Trust us, these puns about tequila will have you saying “te-kill-ya” with laughter. Let’s raise a glass and dive into the top tequila humor – because who said adults can’t have fun too? Cheers to that!

Pouring Out the Best ‘Tequila’ Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Top Picks!

  1. “Why did the margarita get fired? She couldn’t handle her tequila.”
  2. “What did the bartender say when the tequila asked for another refill? ‘You’ve had your shot.'”
  3. “What do you call a tequila-loving ghost? A spookarita.”
  4. “Why isn’t tequila a good wingman? It always steals the lime-light.”
  5. “Why did the margarita break up with the lime? She couldn’t handle his peelings.”
  6. “What’s the best kind of tequila? The kind in my hand.”
  7. “Why do tequila and sugar make the perfect couple? They’re always sweethearts.”
  8. “How does tequila apologize? It says ‘lo siento’ in a shot glass.”
  9. “Why did the bottle of tequila go to therapy? It had too many issues with shots.”
  10. “What do you call a group of tequilas singing together? A shot-tour.”
  11. “Why was the tequila disappointed? It took a shot and missed the target.”
  12. “What’s the difference between a margarita and an elephant? One is a mix of tequila and lime, the other is a mix of elephant and lime.”
  13. “What does the tequila say when someone asks if it wants more salt? ‘Gracias, but I’m already sal-tye-d.'”
  14. “Why does tequila make the best partner in crime? It always has your back, but sometimes it causes trouble.”
  15. “What did the doctor prescribe for someone who’s feeling down? Tequila-laxatives.”
  16. “Why did the limes throw a party for the tequila? They couldn’t bear to see it on the rocks anymore.”
  17. “What’s a pirate’s favorite tequila? Captain Marga-reit-ah.”
  18. “Why did the margarita refuse to go outside? It was afraid of getting blended with the tequila.”
  19. “What does a tequila and a Christmas tree have in common? They both light up the room.”
  20. “Why did the lime dump the tequila? He was a bit too salty for her.”

Get ready for a fiesta of laughs with these hilarious ‘Funny Tequila’ one-liners!

  1. Tequila – because sometimes the worm is the only friend that stays by your side.
  2. I tried to quit drinking tequila, but every time I did, it just made me want to worm my way back to it.
  3. If there’s one thing I’ve learned from drinking tequila, it’s that you can’t trust a shot that has a worm floating in it.
  4. I don’t always drink tequila, but when I do, I end up dancing on the bar and singing “Tequila” by The Champs.
  5. People say “one tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor” but I’m convinced there’s a fourth tequila in there somewhere.
  6. A shot of tequila a day keeps the doctor away – or at least it numbs the pain.
  7. They say “never cry over spilt milk” but no one ever said anything about spilt tequila.
  8. Tequila – for when life gives you limes and salt, but forgets to give you the lemons.
  9. Some people say they have a “skeleton in their closet,” I have a bottle of tequila in mine.
  10. Tequila is a like a hug in a bottle… until it turns into a chokehold.
  11. I don’t always drink tequila, but when I do, I end up waking up with a sombrero and a bandolier of lime wedges.
  12. I don’t have a drinking problem, I have a tequila enthusiasm.
  13. You know it’s going to be a good night when someone shouts “tequila” and everyone shouts back “shots!”
  14. Tequila is like a magic potion – it can turn the shyest person into the life of the party.
  15. Why make lemonade when you can make margaritas?
  16. When life gives you tequila, just say “¡Salud!”
  17. Maybe the real reason the Mayans predicted the end of the world in 2012 was because they ran out of tequila.
  18. Tequila is just like a good friend – always there to pick you up when you’re down.
  19. My doctor said I should have a Mediterranean diet – so I have a shot of tequila with every meal.
  20. Drinking tequila doesn’t solve my problems, but it does make me forget them for a little while.

Answers So Good, They’ll Give You a ‘Shot’ of Laughter: QnA Jokes & Puns about Tequila

  1. Q: What did the tequila say to the lime? A: “I’m feeling a little sour today.”
  2. Q: Why did the tequila go to therapy? A: It had some serious emotional shots.
  3. Q: How many tequilas does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Just one, but you’ll end up changing your outfit and texting your ex by the end of the night.
  4. Q: What’s the best way to drink tequila? A: In a sombrero, while riding a donkey.
  5. Q: Why did the tequila go to school? A: It wanted to get a shot at higher education.
  6. Q: How do you know when you’ve had too much tequila? A: When your lemon wedge starts talking back.
  7. Q: What’s the national bird of Mexico? A: The margarita-vine flying tequila eagle, of course.
  8. Q: What did the tequila bottle say to the vodka bottle? A: “Oye, why are you always so transparent?”
  9. Q: How did the tequila get its name? A: It fought its way out of a barrel and said “I am te-KILL-a!”
  10. Q: What’s a tequila’s favorite TV show? A: Breaking Bad. Because it’s a chemistry whiz.
  11. Q: What’s a tequila’s favorite color? A: If you guessed “blue,” then you’re probably too drunk to be playing this game.
  12. Q: Why was the tequila bottle feeling self-conscious? A: It heard someone say “you look like a shot glass with legs.”
  13. Q: What do you call a group of tequila shots? A: A fiesta in your mouth.
  14. Q: How did the tequila become friends with the salt? A: They were introduced by their mutual friend, the lime.
  15. Q: What’s a tequila’s favorite hobby? A: Barrel rolling.
  16. Q: What did the tequila say to the soda? A: “Let’s mix things up a bit.”
  17. Q: What’s a tequila’s zodiac sign? A: It’s a fire sign, because it burns so good going down.
  18. Q: Why was the tequila feeling depressed? A: It felt like nobody appreciated its aging process.
  19. Q: What do you call a fake tequila? A: An im-po-tequila.
  20. Q: How do you make a tequila laugh? A: Just pour it into a shot glass – it’ll be in stitches.

Tequila: The wise man’s cure for a serious attitude and funny proverbs.

  1. “A shot of tequila a day keeps the doctor away…but attracts the bartender.”
  2. “Tequila is like a genie in a bottle, granting wishes of wild nights and blurry memories.”
  3. “In life, it’s important to have a good sense of humor and a bottle of tequila.”
  4. “The easiest way to break the ice? Just bring a bottle of tequila.”
  5. “The only bad part about tequila is when the bottle is empty.”
  6. “A margarita a day…keeps the boredom away.”
  7. “Tequila: the reason the floor is suddenly closer than it was before.”
  8. “Just like love, tequila burns, but in a good way.”
  9. “A shot of tequila is worth a thousand words…or at least a few hilarious stories.”
  10. “Tequila may not solve your problems, but it’s definitely worth a try.”
  11. “Life is too short to drink cheap tequila.”
  12. “Some people say money can’t buy happiness, but it can buy tequila, and that’s pretty much the same thing.”
  13. “In a world full of stress and chaos, there’s always tequila to make things a little better.”
  14. “Sometimes you just need a little salt, lime, and tequila to make everything okay.”
  15. “I cook with wine, but I drink tequila. Because it’s important to have a balance in life.”
  16. “Tequila: the sworn enemy of clear thinking and coherent speech.”
  17. “A strong margarita is like a hug in a glass.”
  18. “Tequila may not be the answer, but it’s worth a shot.”
  19. “They say laughter is the best medicine, but I think tequila can give it a run for its money.”
  20. “When life gives you lemons, trade them for limes and make yourself a margarita.”

Sip on these clever Dad Jokes about Tequila and pour out a laugh!

  1. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? Because it was two-tired from all the tequila shots.
  2. I accidentally drank an entire bottle of tequila last night. I woke up with a massive hue-headache.
  3. What did the lime say when it saw the tequila shot? “I’m ready to take the “shot” of my life!”
  4. Did you hear about the Mexican magician who disappeared after drinking tequila? He was just doing a te-qui-vanish trick!
  5. What do you call a tequila that doesn’t give you a hangover? A unicorn, because it doesn’t exist!
  6. Why did the pepper go to the bar? To get jalapeño business!
  7. I’ll have a tequila, hold the salt and lime. I’m trying to watch my margaritas!
  8. Why do they call it “happy hour”? Because it’s the time of day when all the tequilas are half-price and everyone is feeling a little happier!
  9. What do you call a tequila that can tell dad jokes? A chilli con hombre!
  10. Why did the avocado go to the bar? To get smashed!
  11. Did you hear about the tequila that got locked out of the party? It couldn’t find its way in since it had too many shots!
  12. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
  13. What do you call a drunken insect? Tequiloworm!
  14. Why did the ghost go to the bar? For some boos!
  15. How many tequila shots does it take to change a lightbulb? None, because the room is already spinning!
  16. Why didn’t the skeleton go to the party? Because he had no body to go with!
  17. What’s a pirate’s favorite drink? A-rrrrr-rmaretto sour!
  18. Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well!
  19. What do you call a sad cup of tea? A teary-eyed!
  20. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? They make up everything, including tequila!

Inebriating Fun!

“Shake Up Your Night with These Tequila Double Entendres Puns – Inebriating Fun Guaranteed!

  1. “Shots, shots, shots- when in doubt, just tequila it out”
  2. “Tequila mockingbird- for when you want to get a little literary with your drinking”
  3. “When life gives you lemons, make tequila margaritas”
  4. “I never trust a person who says they don’t like tequila- they’re probably lying”
  5. “It’s not drinking alone if the tequila is there with you”
  6. “Tequila sunrise, looking for a fun time”
  7. “Tequila: because sometimes wine just isn’t strong enough”
  8. “Tequila: the solution to all of life’s problems (or at least the ones you can’t remember)”
  9. “Tequila is like a hug in a shot glass”
  10. “In tequila we trust”
  11. “Tequila: it’s not just for breakfast anymore”
  12. “Roses are red, tequila is gold, forget all your problems, and just take a hold”
  13. “Tequila: proving that sometimes mistakes can turn into good decisions”
  14. “Tequila may not solve all your problems, but it’s worth a shot”
  15. “Tequila: because sometimes you just need a little liquid courage”
  16. “Nothing a little tequila and tacos can’t fix”
  17. “Why have a margarita, when you can have a tequilagrita?”
  18. “Life is better with salt, lime, and a little bit of tequila”
  19. “Tequila: the real MVP of happy hour”
  20. “Tequila made me do it… and I regret nothing”

Bottoms up for these tequila-tively funny recursive puns!

  1. “Why was the tequila always feeling down? Because no matter how many shots it took, it never found its true ‘spirits’.”
  2. “I asked the bartender if they had any Wayne Gretzky tequila. They said yes, but it’s a highly ‘recycled’ brand.”
  3. “What did the scientist say when they discovered a new element in tequila? It’s ‘Tequila’mentary, my dear Watson.”
  4. “I have a ‘margarita’ therapy session every time I drink tequila.”
  5. “Why don’t ghosts drink tequila? They can’t handle their ‘spirit’ being summoned.”
  6. “What did the grape say when it was turned into tequila? It’s ‘grape-ly’ transformed.”
  7. “Why did the tequila go to high school? To get its ‘spirit’ education.”
  8. “I told my friend to stop drinking tequila and they said ‘one tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor’.”
  9. “Why don’t chickens like drinking tequila? They’re afraid of becoming ‘peckish’.”
  10. “What’s a pirate’s favorite type of tequila? ‘Reposado’.”
  11. “I tried to order some Tequila Mockingbird at the bar but they said they only serve real drinks.”
  12. “Why didn’t the cow like tequila? It wasn’t ‘milk’-able.”
  13. “Why did the worm in the tequila bottle never move? It was too ‘squeezed’ in.”
  14. “What did the doctor say when a patient complained of headaches from drinking too much tequila? ‘You need to take a shot at a better life’.”
  15. “Why did the tequila need glasses? It had ‘blurred’ vision.”
  16. “What did the tequila say when asked about its love life? ‘I’m always ‘on the rocks’ with someone’.”
  17. “Why did the tequila need a map? It couldn’t find its ‘way home’ after a night of drinking.”
  18. “I thought I had a bottle of tequila in my pocket, but it turned out to be my ‘pocket spirit’.”
  19. “Why was the tequila bottle sad? It was always getting ‘spiked’.”
  20. “I tried to pour tequila into my teacup but it kept turning into a ‘spirited’ beverage.”

Tipsy with Tequila: Hilarious Malapropisms That Will Leave You In Stitches!

  1. “I drank so much tequila, I’m definitely going through an agave-lanche.”
  2. “I’m feeling tequila-ous today, watch out!”
  3. “I have a real tequil-appetite for tacos tonight.”
  4. “My boss is a real tequila-lizard, always trying to make me work late.”
  5. “I’m not clumsy, I’m just tequila-prone.”
  6. “Tequila Tuesday is my favorite day of the week.”
  7. “I’m going to take a tequila-batical from work and just relax.”
  8. “You know what they say, a tequila a day keeps the doctor away.”
  9. “I’m not a morning person, I’m a tequila person.”
  10. “I may be tequila-dicted, but at least I’m happy.”
  11. “You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy tequila and that’s pretty much the same thing.”
  12. “I’m a firm believer in the tequila cleanse diet.”
  13. “I don’t trust people who don’t like tequila, they’re just salty.”
  14. “You can’t buy love, but you can buy tequila shots and that’s kind of the same thing.”
  15. “I’m having a bad day, I need some tequila sunshine.”
  16. “I love Mexican food, it’s the perfect pairing for tequila swigs.”
  17. “I may not be a pro-fesional, but I can drink tequila like one.”
  18. “Just remember, life is better with a little lime and tequila.”
  19. “I didn’t choose the tequila life, the tequila life chose me.”
  20. “Why have one shot of tequila when you can have a tutti-frutti?”

Tipsy Tequila: Playful Spoonerisms about Everyone’s Favorite Spirit

  1. Tilaque
  2. Quegila
  3. Kilatequila
  4. Elatequil
  5. Gimatequila
  6. Lequiltia
  7. Tiquala
  8. Quilate
  9. Gatilaque
  10. Stealequil
  11. Rhymequla
  12. Fishtequil
  13. Barriltequ
  14. Dribolitequila
  15. Whiskytequil
  16. Tangotekila
  17. Flamencotequi
  18. Mariachitequ
  19. Salsatequilo
  20. Ponchotequila

Tequila makes Tom swifty- it’s a shot of pun-sational fun!

  1. “I can’t handle this tequila,” Tom said morosely.
  2. “I think I should stick to beer from now on,” Tom stated soberly.
  3. “Tequila makes me feel like a different person,” Tom mused.
  4. “I just took a shot and now I’m feeling agave-rage, y’all,” Tom slurred.
  5. “I’ll have another round of tequila,” Tom said with resolve.
  6. “This drink is making me feel so cactus-y,” Tom remarked.
  7. “I might be drunk, but I’m still a smooth operator,” Tom boasted.
  8. “My head is pounding like a mariachi band,” Tom moaned.
  9. “I think this tequila just cured my fear of heights,” Tom chuckled.
  10. “I’m going to tequila sunrise and shine,” Tom announced.
  11. “I don’t know what’s worse, the hangover or the shame of drinking tequila again,” Tom lamented.
  12. “I’m not drinking tequila ever again…until tomorrow night,” Tom joked.
  13. “I feel like I could run a marathon after that tequila shot,” Tom exclaimed.
  14. “This tequila has me feeling like a walking, talking piñata,” Tom quipped.
  15. “I can’t feel my face, but I can taste the tequila,” Tom slurred.
  16. “I better stop drinking before I get accused of being a tequila thief,” Tom joked.
  17. “I used to think I was tough, until I tried tequila,” Tom admitted defeat.
  18. “Tequila and I have a love-hate relationship…mostly hate,” Tom grumbled.
  19. “Is it just me, or does this tequila taste like regret?” Tom asked.
  20. “I guess it’s true what they say, you can’t handle the truth, or tequila,” Tom smirked.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tequila! Tequila who? Tequila the funny bone with these knock-knock jokes!

  1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tequila. Tequila who? Tequila come over and hang out tonight?
  2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lemon. Lemon who? Lemon squeeze of tequila in this margarita, please!
  3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Salt. Salt who? Salt makes everything better… especially with a shot of tequila!
  4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cactus. Cactus who? Cactus has spines, but tequila has smooth taste!
  5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Sour. Sour who? Sour lime for my tequila, please!
  6. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Mexico. Mexico who? Mexico my favorite place to drink tequila!
  7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Agave. Agave who? Agave you tried this tequila? It’s delicious!
  8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shot. Shot who? Shot of tequila, please and thank you!
  9. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tequila. Tequila who? Tequila make you feel like dancing!
  10. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Salt. Salt who? Salt my rim before I take a shot of tequila!
  11. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lime. Lime who? Lime out for a night of tequila shots with me?
  12. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Jose. Jose who? Jose can say ‘no’ to a shot of tequila!
  13. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Margarita. Margarita who? Margarita in each hand, please!
  14. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shotgun. Shotgun who? Shotgun a margarita with me!
  15. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Desert. Desert who? Desert is the perfect place for a tequila sunrise!
  16. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Mint. Mint who? Mint julep? No thanks, I’ll take a tequila instead.
  17. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Margarita. Margarita who? Margarita life better with a little bit of tequila.
  18. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Mexico. Mexico who? Mexico sure to bring your sombrero for our tequila tasting party.
  19. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Party. Party who? Party like there’s no manana when there’s tequila involved.
  20. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Lime. Lime who? Lime drives me crazy when there’s no tequila left.

Tequila: the real joke’s on us!

Well folks, I hope these tequila puns have been a shot of laughter straight to your funny bone. Whether you like your tequila on the rocks or with a lime and salt, one thing’s for sure: these puns are sure to spice up any fiesta. But don’t just take my word for it, be sure to check out our other hilarious pun and joke posts to keep the laughs pouring in. And remember, when life gives you lemons, squeeze them into your tequila and make a margarita! Cheers!

Jami Ch., the enthusiastic owner and operator of PunnyFunny.com

PunnyFunny Team

I'm Jami Ch., the enthusiastic owner and operator of PunnyFunny.com, where I and my team share the best puns and jokes with the world. My passion for original humor drives me to create content that keeps everyone smiling. As a dedicated humorist, I've made PunnyFunny.com a haven for those who love a good laugh, just like me. Explore my Best Puns & Jokes collection.

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