200+ Belly-Laugh Inducing Baby Jokes & Puns

funny Baby jokes with one liner clever Baby puns at PunnyFunny.com

Introducing the best collection of baby jokes & puns! Get ready for your daily dose of humor and laughter with our list of clever and positive quips about little ones. From funny observations to hilarious punchlines, these jokes are guaranteed to make your day brighter. So buckle up and get ready for some baby talk, because this is one post that will have you giggling and cooing in no time! Let’s dive into this bundle of joy and see what hilarity we can find.

Chuckling with Cuteness: Our Top “Baby”-liscious Puns & Jokes

  1. Why couldn’t the baby go to sleep? Because she was having a “crying spell.”
  2. What did the baby say when she saw her bottle? “I’m gonna grab-a-bottle!”
  3. Why did the baby cross the playground? To get to the other “slide.”
  4. How do you know when a baby is a magician? When he starts pulling “milk” out of a hat.
  5. What did the baby say when she saw a squirrel? “Look, a tiny hooman!”
  6. Why are babies always tired? Because they spend all day “playing” and “tummy-time” napping.
  7. What did the baby say to the turkey? “Gobble gobble ba-ba-ba!”
  8. Why didn’t the baby want to eat her mashed peas? Because she found them “unappee-sing.”
  9. How do you make a tissue dance? Put some “boogie” in it and give it to a baby.
  10. What do you call a baby who’s always looking for trouble? An “in-fun-til”!
  11. How do you know when a baby is a future rockstar? When she starts “screaming” into her toy microphone.
  12. What did the baby say when she saw a donut for the first time? “Da-na-naaa-nut!”
  13. Why did the baby refuse to eat his vegetables? Because he didn’t want to be a “pea-pil.”
  14. How do you know when a baby is an artist? When they start “drawing” all over the walls with their food.
  15. What did the baby say when he met his new puppy? “Aww, you’re so “fur-baby cute!”
  16. How does a baby ask for a cookie in sign language? By making a “cookie-cutter” shape with her hands.
  17. What did the baby say when she saw her reflection for the first time? “Who’s that cute little hooman?”
  18. Why did the baby refuse to go to bed? Because she wanted to “stay-up and p-aar-tee-y!”
  19. How do you find a lost baby in a grocery store? Just “follow the trail of spilled Cheerios.”
  20. What do you call a group of babies having a playdate? A “cuddle-ation!”

Get a Giggle with these Hilarious Funny Baby One-Liner Jokes!

  1. Why did the baby go to sleep on the keyboard? He wanted to have power naps.
  2. What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? “Where’s my popcorn?”
  3. I wanted to write a joke about a pacifier, but it sucked.
  4. Why was the baby strawberry crying? His parents were in a jam.
  5. Did you hear about the kidnapping at the playground? The baby woke up.
  6. Why did the baby cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
  7. Did you hear about the baby who couldn’t stop laughing? He was having a giggle fit.
  8. What do you call a baby who is always hungry? A snack-oholic.
  9. Why did the baby chicken need a Band-Aid? He had a pecking order accident.
  10. I couldn’t figure out why the baby kept staring at the orange juice bottle. Then it clicked.
  11. What do you call a baby monkey who loves to sing? A rapscallion.
  12. Why did the diaper go to law school? He wanted to pass the bar.
  13. Did you hear about the pickpocket at the playground? He got away with nap time.
  14. Why did the baby tomato turn red? Because he saw the salad dressing.
  15. What do you call a baby ghost who is always cold? A shivering spectre.
  16. I asked my baby if he wanted a toy car or a toy train. He said he wanted a toyota.
  17. Why don’t babies ever gamble in the jungle? Because there are too many cheetahs.
  18. Did you hear about the baby who always had trouble sleeping? He had a lot of cradle issues.
  19. What do you call a baby bee who is always eating? A honey bugger.
  20. Why did the baby go to the doctor? He wanted to get a shot of energy.

Tickle Your Funny Bone with These Hilarious QnA Jokes & Puns About Babies

  1. Q: What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? A: Where’s my popcorn?
  2. Q: What do you call a baby rabbit that’s always getting into trouble? A: A little hop-scapade.
  3. Q: Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? A: Because it was two-tired.
  4. Q: How does a baby astronaut communicate? A: He uses space talk-et.
  5. Q: What did the baby fish say when it swam into a wall? A: Dam!
  6. Q: How do you make a baby laugh? A: Tickle its toes-ies.
  7. Q: What’s a baby’s favorite type of pizza? A: Cheesy, of course.
  8. Q: Why don’t skeletons fight each other? A: They don’t have the guts.
  9. Q: What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it? A: Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
  10. Q: What do you call a baby bear with no teeth? A: A gummy bear.
  11. Q: Why did the tomato turn red? A: Because it saw the salad dressing.
  12. Q: What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? A: “I can’t ear you!”
  13. Q: What did the grape do when it got stepped on? A : It let out a little ‘whine’.
  14. Q: Why did the teddy bear say no to dessert? A: He was already stuffed.
  15. Q: What did one slice of bread say to the other slice? A: “You’re toast!”
  16. Q: Why did the banana go to the doctor? A: Because it wasn’t peeling well.
  17. Q: What did the baby pig say when it wanted to go outside? A: “Let me pork my snout!”
  18. Q: What kind of music do mummies listen to? A: Wrap music.
  19. Q: Why did the baby strawberry cry? A: Because its parents were in a jam.
  20. Q: What did the baby corn say when it saw the mama corn? A: “Aww shucks, I’m not ready to come out of the husk!”

Cuteness Overload: Hilarious Baby Proverbs and Sage Sayings!

  1. A baby’s laughter is the best medicine – just make sure it’s not the tequila kind.
  2. A baby is nature’s way of telling you to clean your house.
  3. Sleep when the baby sleeps – or you’ll never sleep again.
  4. There are two types of people in this world: those with babies, and those who can still find their car keys.
  5. A baby’s cry is the ultimate alarm clock – and it never has a snooze button.
  6. Diapers and politicians have one thing in common – they both need to be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
  7. Babies are like little drunk people – constantly spilling, falling, and babbling nonsense.
  8. The best way to learn new lullabies is to have a baby – they’ll never let you miss a verse.
  9. A baby’s first word is usually “mama” or “dada” – but every parent secretly hopes for “chocolate” or “wine”.
  10. Giving birth is like running a marathon with no training – but instead of a medal, you get an adorable tiny human.
  11. A baby’s smile is proof that you’re doing something right – or that they just farted.
  12. Parenthood is a constant battle between wanting alone time and missing your child as soon as they’re asleep.
  13. A screaming baby is just a tiny dictator practicing their vocal chords.
  14. A child’s first year is spent teaching them to walk and talk – and the next 18 years telling them to sit down and be quiet.
  15. The best things come in small packages – especially when they’re wrapped in blankets and smell like baby powder.
  16. Parenthood: the only job where you have to constantly clean up someone else’s poop, and still love them unconditionally.
  17. Baby-proofing your house is like trying to stop a leak with a Band-Aid – it might work temporarily, but eventually everything will come crashing down.
  18. Babies grow up in the blink of an eye – just make sure you’re not blinking during the important moments.
  19. A baby’s laughter can make even the worst day seem better – unless you’re trying to take a nap.
  20. They say babies are expensive – but no one warns you about the cost of coffee to survive their sleepless nights.

Get Ready to LOL: Hilarious Dad Jokes About Babies

  1. Did you hear about the baby who couldn’t stop crying? He was just having a little “toddler tantrum.”
  2. Why did the baby go to bed with a flashlight? Because he was afraid of the “boogie man!”
  3. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was “two-tired.”
  4. What did the mama grape say to the baby grape? “Don’t be a little sour-puss!”
  5. Have you heard about the new corduroy pillows? They’re making “headlines!”
  6. I used to hate facial hair, but then it “grew on me.”
  7. What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? “Where’s my popcorn?”
  8. Why did the tomato turn red? Because it “saw” the salad dressing!
  9. What’s the best way to communicate with a fish? Drop him a “line!”
  10. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was “two-tired.”
  11. Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because if they lived by the bay, they’d be called “bagels!”
  12. What did the grape do when he was stepped on? He “let out a little wine!”
  13. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his “field!”
  14. How do you organize a space party? You “planet!”
  15. What do you give a sick bird? “Tweetment!”
  16. Did you hear about the kidnapping at the playground? They woke up!
  17. What do you call a belt made out of watches? A “waist of time!”
  18. Why can’t you trust atoms? They make up everything!
  19. How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Ten-tickles!
  20. How do you organize a space party? You “planet!”

Baby-naming ‘puns’essential for a hilarious and pun-derful nursery

  1. “I’m so good at changing diapers, I could do it blindfolded and still come out smelling like a rose.”
  2. “No one can resist my baby’s charm – they always end up melting in her hands.”
  3. “I’m the proud parent of a future heartbreaker.”
  4. “They say babies are bundles of joy, but when they start projectile pooping, it’s more like bundles of mess.”
  5. “You know you’re a mom when your belly button becomes a target.”
  6. “I may be small, but my cries can be heard from miles away.”
  7. “I’ve got my hands full with this little bundle of joy, literally.”
  8. “Babies are like the Energizer bunny – they keep going and going and going…”
  9. “They say having a baby changes your life – who knew it also changed your sleep schedule?”
  10. “Babies are the ultimate wingmen – just watch how people fawn over you when you’re pushing a stroller.”
  11. “They say babies are born with a clean slate, but my little one seems to have already mastered the art of giving side-eye.”
  12. “I never knew something so small could create such big messes.”
  13. “I’m starting a petition to add baby giggles to the list of natural antidepressants.”
  14. “Forget gym memberships – have you tried carrying a 10-pound weight around all day?”
  15. “Babies don’t come with instruction manuals, but I’m pretty sure sleepless nights and repetitive diaper changes are required.”
  16. “I never knew multitasking until I became a parent – now I can simultaneously hold a baby, make dinner, and fold laundry.”
  17. “They say babies are expensive, but have you seen the cost of diapers these days?”
  18. “I may have given birth, but my baby is the real boss of this household.”
  19. “Babies may be small, but their cries have the power to shatter glass.”
  20. “I may not be a morning person, but my baby seems to be a 24/7 party animal.”

Tickle your funny bone with these clever recursive puns about baby!

  1. Why couldn’t the newborn lift his pacifier? Because he wasn’t up to the task!
  2. Why did the baby go to the bank? To get some bottle caps!
  3. What do you call a baby who is always fighting with his siblings? A little warring son!
  4. What did the father say when his wife asked for help changing the baby’s diaper? “Sorry, I’m not a diaper-y changer!”
  5. Why did the baby refuse to take a nap? Because he was afraid he would wake up as a double “trouble”!
  6. What did the baby’s shirt say when it got wet at the pool? “I’m all wet’eth!”
  7. Why did the baby laugh at his own jokes? Because he was just a little pun-y!
  8. What did the baby’s grandmother say when she forgot his name? “I’m sorry, I have a case of amnesia-and-baby!”
  9. What did the baby say when his siblings asked if he wanted to join their game? “I’m game for anything!”
  10. Why did the baby go to the prom with an umbilical cord necklace? Because he liked to accessorize with his natural choker!
  11. What did the doctor say to the newborn who had a fever? “Looks like you have a little temperature-toddler!”
  12. Why did the baby put on a superhero cape? To prove he was super-cuddly and not just a regular-cuddly!
  13. What did the baby say when his mother asked him if he was hungry? “I sure am mother-forker!”
  14. Why did the baby get an early start on his math homework? Because he was in the multiplying stages of his life!
  15. What did the baby say when his sister tried to play with his toys? “I’m not sharing my play-doughly created masterpieces!”
  16. Why did the baby refuse to wear a diaper? Because he wanted to be a little pants-y rebel!
  17. What did the baby say when his parents asked what he wanted for his birthday? “I don’t want anything, I’m a little gift-y enough!”
  18. Why did the baby want to live in a castle? He was a little prince on a “throne” quest!
  19. What did the baby say when he burped? “Excuse me, I can’t control my “gas-loops”!”
  20. Why did the baby want to play with his food instead of eating it? Because he was a little food “party-pooper”!

Cute Bloopers: Exploring the World of Baby Malapropisms

  1. “I need to go take a quick napkin.” (instead of “nap”)
  2. “I spilled my grape juice all over the floor, mommy. Can you bring me a moppy?” (instead of “mop”)
  3. “Look at that big bookie!” (instead of “bug”)
  4. “I’m going to put on my shoesies.” (instead of “shoes”)
  5. “Where did you put my noony?” (instead of “blanket”)
  6. “Do you have any nummies for me?” (instead of “snacks”)
  7. “I want to play with my dollydoo.” (instead of “doll”)
  8. “Can I have a drink from my sippy cuppy?” (instead of “sippy cup”)
  9. “I love to jump on the tramploon.” (instead of “trampoline”)
  10. “Mommy, can I have some chippies with my lunchie?” (instead of “chips”)
  11. “I have to go potty, I’m feeling a little bit earful.” (instead of “fearful”)
  12. “Look at the birdie! That’s a yellow bumblebee!” (instead of “bumblebee”)
  13. “Daddy, can we play fishy ball outside?” (instead of “football”)
  14. “Why is that man wearing a swimmy suit outside in the winter?” (instead of “snowsuit”)
  15. “I don’t want to go nigh nigh! I’m not even tired-y!” (instead of “night night” and “tired”)
  16. “Do you like my new jammies? They have horsey on them!” (instead of “pajamas” and “horses”)
  17. “Can we go to the park and play on the far-away slide?” (instead of “playground”)
  18. “I don’t like peas, they’re too punchy!” (instead of “peppery”)
  19. “My crayons are all scrumbled up!” (instead of “scrambled”)
  20. “I love this song, it’s my favorite tittie!” (instead of “ditty”)

Tickle Your Funny ‘Bibbles’ with These Spoonerisms about Baby

  1. “Bottle of noise” instead of “crying baby”
  2. “Goo-choo train” instead of “choo-choo train”
  3. “Baba’s tummy” instead of “tummy time”
  4. “Diaper wrestling” instead of “diaper changing”
  5. “Bewitched bib” instead of “wet bib”
  6. “Nappy happy” instead of “happy baby”
  7. “Burpy gurgles” instead of “gurgling baby”
  8. “Piddle puddle” instead of “puddle of drool”
  9. “Binky dinky” instead of “pinkie finger”
  10. “Binky hiccup” instead of “hiccuping baby”
  11. “Gummy bear” instead of “baby’s gum”
  12. “Stroller coaster” instead of “rollercoaster of emotions”
  13. “Cuddle bug” instead of “bundle of joy”
  14. “Squishy cheeks” instead of “chubby cheeks”
  15. “Teething woe” instead of “teething woes”
  16. “Cooing crooner” instead of “babbling baby”
  17. “Blankie bankie” instead of “security blanket”
  18. “Spitty kitty” instead of “spitting up”
  19. “Bottle bottle” instead of “bottle feeding”
  20. “Pee-pee teepee” instead of “changing table”.

Baby Tom Swifties: The “Infant” Adventure of Wordplay

  1. “I’ll never let go,” Kate said bashfully baby Tom Swifties.
  2. “Can we please go to the park?” Timmy said whiningly baby Tom Swifties.
  3. “I can’t wait to try this new formula,” the baby said excitedly baby Tom Swifties.
  4. “This diaper change is the worst,” the mom said poo-ishly baby Tom Swifties.
  5. “I think I just said my first word,” the baby babbled on baby Tom Swifties.
  6. “I hope this pacifier actually works,” the dad said suck-essfully baby Tom Swifties.
  7. “I wanna go to Disneyland!” the toddler said Mickeyly baby Tom Swifties.
  8. “I’m not going to bed, ever,” the kid said exhaustedly baby Tom Swifties.
  9. “If I don’t get a nap, I’m going to cry,” the baby complained crankily baby Tom Swifties.
  10. “Do I really have to share my toys?” the child asked selfishly baby Tom Swifties.
  11. “I may be small, but I’m mighty,” the baby boasted egoistically baby Tom Swifties.
  12. “I think I’m ready for solid foods,” the baby said spoon-fedly baby Tom Swifties.
  13. “I’m in charge now,” the toddler said bossily baby Tom Swifties.
  14. “Mom, can I have some milk please?” the baby said moo-ingly baby Tom Swifties.
  15. “This stroller ride is giving me major motion sickness,” the baby said nauseously baby Tom Swifties.
  16. “I don’t want green beans, I want ice cream!” the toddler whined desire-lingly baby Tom Swifties.
  17. “Can we please stop at the petting zoo?” the child begged animally baby Tom Swifties.
  18. “No more bath time, I’m pruney!” the baby declared wrinkly baby Tom Swifties.
  19. “I’m not wet, that’s just baby drool,” the parent said denial-lingly baby Tom Swifties.
  20. “Okay kids, let’s go to the library,” the babysitter said booksually baby Tom Swifties.

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby hilarity awaits with these top-notch knock-knock jokes!

  1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby you’re the best joke teller I know!
  2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, I’m just here for the giggles!
  3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, let me in before I start crying!
  4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, can I borrow a pacifier? I need something to chew on!
  5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, are you going to tell me a joke or just keep knocking?
  6. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, did you hear about the diaper shortage? It’s a real mess!
  7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, I think you owe me a burp after all that milk I drank!
  8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, can you keep a secret? I’m about to tell you a funny joke!
  9. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, do you know why the chicken crossed the road? To get to the baby on the other side!
  10. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, are you sure you don’t need a nap? You’re looking a little cranky!
  11. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, you’re so cute, you should be illegal!
  12. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, can I have my toys back now? You’ve been playing with them long enough!
  13. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, why did the baby go to the hospital? Because he felt a little ‘rattle’!
  14. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, why did the baby put his money in the freezer? He wanted cold hard cash!
  15. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, I’m not a baby, I’m a grown-up…baby!
  16. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, I heard there’s a new baby movie coming out. It’s called ‘In-diaper-able’!
  17. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, I’m the boss around here…or at least that’s what my parents tell me!
  18. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, have you heard of the baby corn? It’s just like regular corn, but a lot cuter and smaller!
  19. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, do you know why the baby went to bed with a ruler? Because he wanted to measure how long he slept!
  20. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby. Baby who? Baby, I’m not just a cute chubby face, I’m also funny!

Leaving with a baby-teaser and giggle!

And with that, we come to the end of our 200+ puns and jokes about babies. From diaper-dreading dads to sneaky stork deliveries, we hope these puns have tickled your funny bone and made you giggle like a baby. Don’t forget to check out our other pun and joke posts for more laughs. Until next time, keep on punning!

Jami Ch., the enthusiastic owner and operator of PunnyFunny.com

PunnyFunny Team

I'm Jami Ch., the enthusiastic owner and operator of PunnyFunny.com, where I and my team share the best puns and jokes with the world. My passion for original humor drives me to create content that keeps everyone smiling. As a dedicated humorist, I've made PunnyFunny.com a haven for those who love a good laugh, just like me. Explore my Best Puns & Jokes collection.

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